Why, oh why, must they make us wait 2 weeks for the Super Bowl? How much hype can we take? What the hell am I supposed to do this Sunday? Sheesh... As for the championship games...
In the AFC game... Well, so much for the under. And so much for it being close.
It was actually a pretty good game though, despite the final score. I think the real defining moment was when the Steelers had it first and goal from like the 5, and if they get a TD they pull within 7. Run stuffed, pass defended, run stuffed, they settle for a field goal. Ben looked the rookie part, and made my Trent Dilfer comparisons look even more genius. And god, he was in a lot of commercials for someone who really isn't proven yet. And you know who played a hell of a game? That Asante (or whatever) Samuels guy. Several nice plays in the secondary.
As far as playoff picks go.. Going into the Super Bowl, Samichlaus is 7-3 and St. Ides is a woeful 3-7....
Oh, and although Vinatieri didn't boot a 50-yarder to win it, he still made the record books by tying the longest FG at Heinz Field with his 48-yarder.
In the NFC, Vick pretty much did what people were afraid he might do: try to throw, and forget to run. Even when he did his "uh oh" scrambles in the backfield, he was brought down. I'm still not sure what to make of Vick, and not sure I believe the "Well, he's still learning a new system, give him another year or two" bullshit excuse people keep making for him. They made it to the NFC Championship game. That just doesn't happen every season. He needs to win that game no matter what system he's in, not despite it. I wouldn't be surprised if Atlanta drops back to a 9-7 or 8-8 team next season.
And one last reminder, from a previous article, here's the hype you can look forward to for the remaining week and a half:
Pats: Dynasty? Belichek as a genius and the best coach in the NFL. Their hard-working defense with no true "stars". Brady as the next Montana.
Eagles: McNabb as finally "taking the next step". The Eagles finally getting past the NFC title game, and how they can maybe finally bring a championship home. Comparisons to the Red Sox this year of a team that often fell JUST short of the title.
Throw in a non-stop TO Watch, and that ought to cover most of the stories. :P
Thursday, January 27, 2005
Monday, January 24, 2005
Exclusive Samichlaus Insider!!!
My inside source in Milwaukee called this morning with the following: The Packers plan to demote Bob Slowik to defensive backs coach and are interviewing former Miami Dolphins Defensive Coordinator Jim Bates to take over for Slowik.
I have mixed feelings about this. On one hand I am thrilled at the possibility of Bates being in charge. He’s a terrific coach. His defenses usually land in the top ten, and his players love him. This could not be more evident than with the 3 – 4 record he had as interim head coach of the Dolphins, a team that was 1 – 8 prior to Bates taking the reigns.
On the other hand, the defensive coordinator should have some say over his position coaches, and what in the name of Christ on a popsicle stick does Bob Slowik have over Mike Sherman? Slowik is like this cancer on the team, a malignancy that can’t be killed. This decision, if it turns out as my source predicts, is analogous to buying a beautiful new car but having to use the engine from your old beater.
One final thought: Ed (Antonio Salieri) Donatell was fired mainly for not being able to defend the infamous 4th and 26 against the Eagles in their 2003 NFC playoff game. Donatell took the hit for the failure of many, including Mike Sherman, whose gutless play calling took opportunity out of the Packers hands on several occasions. When one objectively looks at the 4th and 26 play, the most blaring failures fall upon the Packers secondary, including Mike McKenzie, Darren Sharper, Marques Anderson and Michael Hawthorn who were all out of position. All out of position and all coached by defensive backs coach Bob Slowik.
Christ.
I have mixed feelings about this. On one hand I am thrilled at the possibility of Bates being in charge. He’s a terrific coach. His defenses usually land in the top ten, and his players love him. This could not be more evident than with the 3 – 4 record he had as interim head coach of the Dolphins, a team that was 1 – 8 prior to Bates taking the reigns.
On the other hand, the defensive coordinator should have some say over his position coaches, and what in the name of Christ on a popsicle stick does Bob Slowik have over Mike Sherman? Slowik is like this cancer on the team, a malignancy that can’t be killed. This decision, if it turns out as my source predicts, is analogous to buying a beautiful new car but having to use the engine from your old beater.
One final thought: Ed (Antonio Salieri) Donatell was fired mainly for not being able to defend the infamous 4th and 26 against the Eagles in their 2003 NFC playoff game. Donatell took the hit for the failure of many, including Mike Sherman, whose gutless play calling took opportunity out of the Packers hands on several occasions. When one objectively looks at the 4th and 26 play, the most blaring failures fall upon the Packers secondary, including Mike McKenzie, Darren Sharper, Marques Anderson and Michael Hawthorn who were all out of position. All out of position and all coached by defensive backs coach Bob Slowik.
Christ.
Friday, January 21, 2005
Taking the Schott for Slowik
Both the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel and the Green Bay Press Gazette are reporting that the Packers have fired Defensive Backs coach Kurt Schottenheimer. This is the worst news Packer fans could have received at this crucial juncture in team history.
It’s not that Schottenheimer is any good, in fact he was God awful. Packer DB’s had their worst collective season in recent history, and Schottenheimer was their leader and apologist. His laid-back coaching style completely failed, eventually leading to a televised sideline shouting match between DBs after Randy Moss scored his now infamous ass wiping touchdown. The reason why this is such bad news is because Schottenheimer is the second worst coach on Defense.
The worst is Bob Slowik.
And if the decision was made to fire Schottenheimer at this juncture, we can only assume that the decision was made to keep Slowik. And that is a crime. Of course this should come as no surprise. Mike Sherman’s one tragic flaw is that he does not admit mistakes. One only needs to look as far as the B.J. Sander fiasco to see how deeply this trait runs in Sherman. When the team needed defensive help, he kept the punter. When we were down to three healthy receivers, he kept the punter. No matter what detriment the team faced Sherman kept the punter rather than admit this tremendous misjudgment Releasing Slowik after firing Ed (Antonio Salieri) Donatell would be to admit a mistake, and having his pride shook this week would be too much for the suddenly fragile Sherman.
I watched Sherman’s season ending news conference. He was visibly shaken, and at one point got testy with MJS reporter Tom Silverstein. That was atypical behavior for the usually patient and classy Sherman, although in all fairness Silverstein’s question was inaudible. After today’s events I was left hoping that the exchange went something like this:
Silverstein: Coach, can you comment on what it’s like to have a filthy toothless cocksucker worthless piece of shit moron scumbag douche pissstain like Bob Slowik for a defensive coordinator, and could you tell us when the public castration will be held? Also, have you gotten an “I told you so” call from Mike McKenzie?
Sherman: (Pauses) Why don’t you ask one of your unnamed sources? They’re more reliable than me. Next question.
I’ve been checking the wires periodically, hoping for some sign that I’m wrong. Any rumor will do, anything that says “Packers fire Slowik”. I’ll even settle for “Unnamed source says Packers fire Slowik” but if it doesn’t happen soon, then I’ll be looking for stories titled “New Packer GM Fires Sherman”
PS: The character of Antonio Salieri remarks at the end of “Amadeus”: “That’s what I am, the patron saint of mediocrities”
It’s not that Schottenheimer is any good, in fact he was God awful. Packer DB’s had their worst collective season in recent history, and Schottenheimer was their leader and apologist. His laid-back coaching style completely failed, eventually leading to a televised sideline shouting match between DBs after Randy Moss scored his now infamous ass wiping touchdown. The reason why this is such bad news is because Schottenheimer is the second worst coach on Defense.
The worst is Bob Slowik.
And if the decision was made to fire Schottenheimer at this juncture, we can only assume that the decision was made to keep Slowik. And that is a crime. Of course this should come as no surprise. Mike Sherman’s one tragic flaw is that he does not admit mistakes. One only needs to look as far as the B.J. Sander fiasco to see how deeply this trait runs in Sherman. When the team needed defensive help, he kept the punter. When we were down to three healthy receivers, he kept the punter. No matter what detriment the team faced Sherman kept the punter rather than admit this tremendous misjudgment Releasing Slowik after firing Ed (Antonio Salieri) Donatell would be to admit a mistake, and having his pride shook this week would be too much for the suddenly fragile Sherman.
I watched Sherman’s season ending news conference. He was visibly shaken, and at one point got testy with MJS reporter Tom Silverstein. That was atypical behavior for the usually patient and classy Sherman, although in all fairness Silverstein’s question was inaudible. After today’s events I was left hoping that the exchange went something like this:
Silverstein: Coach, can you comment on what it’s like to have a filthy toothless cocksucker worthless piece of shit moron scumbag douche pissstain like Bob Slowik for a defensive coordinator, and could you tell us when the public castration will be held? Also, have you gotten an “I told you so” call from Mike McKenzie?
Sherman: (Pauses) Why don’t you ask one of your unnamed sources? They’re more reliable than me. Next question.
I’ve been checking the wires periodically, hoping for some sign that I’m wrong. Any rumor will do, anything that says “Packers fire Slowik”. I’ll even settle for “Unnamed source says Packers fire Slowik” but if it doesn’t happen soon, then I’ll be looking for stories titled “New Packer GM Fires Sherman”
PS: The character of Antonio Salieri remarks at the end of “Amadeus”: “That’s what I am, the patron saint of mediocrities”
PPS: I just shared this news with Karen, who in stunned robotic voice began repeating "ALL DEFENSIVE COACHES MUST BE FIRED!!!"
email me at: samichlaus@beerdrinkingfools.orgThursday, January 20, 2005
Yikes and Double Yikes
I’ve missed blogging, but with my workload picking up and my DSL down at home I’ve barely had time to scratch my ass. Hang on a sec, gotta scratch my ass. Ahhhh! Nothing beats the sweet scrape of relief.
OK, here’s what you missed: The Packers lost to the Vikings, and thus ended the grand experiment we’ve called Double Yikes. Double Yikes is Mike Sherman GM and Mike Sherman Coach, and the term was pirated from an article St. Ides sent me once that had this line “Mike Sherman is still their coach? Double Yikes!”
So as coach and GM, Mike Sherman became Double Yikes. It seemed appropriate until Bob Harlan mercifully removed the GM title from Sherman’s resume and hired Ted Thompson to assume full control of the organization. Ted seems like a funny guy. I like him. I like Mike Sherman too, but I have to ask. It’s Thursday. Why is Bob Slowik still employed? Yikes!
Hmmm…
Yikes is a pretty good football coach. The players seem to like him too, all except for Mike McKenzie. Yesterday I tried to find his email address so I could send him a reminder to fire Bob Slowick. I figure Yikes had a tough week (after loosing his title and all) and he may have forgot. My web searches were fruitless so today I’m breaking out my geek hat and I’m going to use nslookup and a few other geek tools. Needless to say, Yikes is going to be visited by Samichlaus himself. I figure the email would go something like this:
Dear Mr. Sherman,
It’s Thursday. Why is Bob Slowik still employed? Have a great day!
Steve Samichlaus.
PS: Samichlaus isn’t my real name just like Yikes isn’t your real name. Wait, you don’t know about that. Never mind.
In a way, I’m glad the Packers season ended the way it did. I’m hoping the image of Randy Moss wiping his ass on the goalpost stays in the minds of the players, the coaches, the all too forgiving fans, and the new GM. Years ago, 49er Terrell Owens tried to do a touchdown celebration on the 50 yard line in Texas Stadium… and was promptly knocked on his ass by Cowboy (and ex-Packer) George Teague. There’s no one on this Packer team, no one, with the guts to do that to Moss. The Packers need tough snot-bubbling hitters on defense, and a tough snot-bubbling defensive coordinator.
Is Buddy Ryan still alive???
OK, here’s what you missed: The Packers lost to the Vikings, and thus ended the grand experiment we’ve called Double Yikes. Double Yikes is Mike Sherman GM and Mike Sherman Coach, and the term was pirated from an article St. Ides sent me once that had this line “Mike Sherman is still their coach? Double Yikes!”
So as coach and GM, Mike Sherman became Double Yikes. It seemed appropriate until Bob Harlan mercifully removed the GM title from Sherman’s resume and hired Ted Thompson to assume full control of the organization. Ted seems like a funny guy. I like him. I like Mike Sherman too, but I have to ask. It’s Thursday. Why is Bob Slowik still employed? Yikes!
Hmmm…
Yikes is a pretty good football coach. The players seem to like him too, all except for Mike McKenzie. Yesterday I tried to find his email address so I could send him a reminder to fire Bob Slowick. I figure Yikes had a tough week (after loosing his title and all) and he may have forgot. My web searches were fruitless so today I’m breaking out my geek hat and I’m going to use nslookup and a few other geek tools. Needless to say, Yikes is going to be visited by Samichlaus himself. I figure the email would go something like this:
Dear Mr. Sherman,
It’s Thursday. Why is Bob Slowik still employed? Have a great day!
Steve Samichlaus.
PS: Samichlaus isn’t my real name just like Yikes isn’t your real name. Wait, you don’t know about that. Never mind.
In a way, I’m glad the Packers season ended the way it did. I’m hoping the image of Randy Moss wiping his ass on the goalpost stays in the minds of the players, the coaches, the all too forgiving fans, and the new GM. Years ago, 49er Terrell Owens tried to do a touchdown celebration on the 50 yard line in Texas Stadium… and was promptly knocked on his ass by Cowboy (and ex-Packer) George Teague. There’s no one on this Packer team, no one, with the guts to do that to Moss. The Packers need tough snot-bubbling hitters on defense, and a tough snot-bubbling defensive coordinator.
Is Buddy Ryan still alive???
Championship Games Picks
So who's going to the Super Bowl and who's going home? What chances do we say there might be for an all Pennsylvania Super Bowl? Is it possible we might actually have more than 2 readers these days? These questions and more will be answered. Right now...
As always, St. Ides picks in blue, Samichlaus in green...
I'm probably slightly insane taking both road teams in the conference finals, but with how awful my picks have been lately, I could stand a little insanity to try and shape things up:
Falcons (+5) over EAGLES
Forecast: Snow and wind. Vick versus McNabb. Sketchy receivers versus sketchy receivers. Really good defense that gets a lot of recognition versus a pretty good defense that doesn't get a lot of notice. I'm going to go with the Falcons just because I don't think they'll even have to throw very much. With their running game (1st in the league this year, I might add) of Vick, Dunn, and Duckett, they have a nice combination there that keeps the defense off balance just enough. Oh, and their O-line is now coached by the old Denver O-line coach who teaches his linemen to go for the knees. Nice. Let's see if Trotter can avoid them. I think this comes down to Vick making one or two highlight film plays, McNabb making one or two "up for grabs" throws (that his team doesn't grab), and the pressure just being too much for the Eagles.
Falcons 23, Eagles 18
The question that begs to be asked is “Will the aforementioned snow and wind slow down Vick enough to make him a non factor?” I see the Falcons as a one dimensional team: Vick. With poor weather in the forecast, Vick becomes human. Don’t be surprised if the grass is a little thicker this week either. All year long I’ve bet against Philly. I’ve been certain that they are not as good as they’re given credit for. All year long I’ve been wrong. I’m picking Philly, but I’m rooting for the human highlight film. I’ve decided I hate Philly.
Eagles 24 – Vicks 10
Pats (-3) over STEELERS
Forecast: Snow and wind. It's a little surprising that the Pats are a 3 point favorite on the road to the #1 seed, but I think that's probably a reaction to the way the betting is going. Everybody is taking the Pats. What is fresh in everybody's mind is their dismantling of the Colts and Pittburgh's close call against the Jets. Nobody remembers that the Steelers pretty much man-handled the New England back in week 8. But a couple things to remember: Corey Dillon didn't play. And the Pats O-line was banged up. This time, they have Dillon back, and their line healthy. They have the confidence and swagger. They have the linebackers and defensive schemes to make Big Ben's life miserable. He looked awful last week against the Jets. This week he says he's going to play without the gloves he wore. The gloves won't be the issue. The defense will be.
Oh, and I'll repeat this line I sent to Jon earlier in the week:
During last week's Steelers-Jets game, they flashed the stat that there's never been a 50+ yarder kicked at Heinz Field.
Paging Mr. Vinatieri... Mr. Vinatieri...the history books are on Line 1.
Patriots 16, Steelers 13
That line started at 2 and jumped a point. Tells you that the smart money is on the Pats. St. Ides has to post his “Big Ben is really Trent Dilfer” postulate. After I read that, I was convinced too. Here’s my take: if Peyton Manning couldn’t score on the Pats, what in the name of Christ is Roethlisberger going to do? Maybe the Steelers keep it close with their D. Maybe Bettis (who gets the start) can grind out some yards. Ultimately the Patriots are the class of the league and find a way to win.
Patriots 13 – Steelers 6. P.S.: take the under.
(Editor's note: The St. Ides “Big Ben is really Trent Dilfer” postulate appears in the previous post about Super Bowl Hype. :P )
As always, St. Ides picks in blue, Samichlaus in green...
I'm probably slightly insane taking both road teams in the conference finals, but with how awful my picks have been lately, I could stand a little insanity to try and shape things up:
Falcons (+5) over EAGLES
Forecast: Snow and wind. Vick versus McNabb. Sketchy receivers versus sketchy receivers. Really good defense that gets a lot of recognition versus a pretty good defense that doesn't get a lot of notice. I'm going to go with the Falcons just because I don't think they'll even have to throw very much. With their running game (1st in the league this year, I might add) of Vick, Dunn, and Duckett, they have a nice combination there that keeps the defense off balance just enough. Oh, and their O-line is now coached by the old Denver O-line coach who teaches his linemen to go for the knees. Nice. Let's see if Trotter can avoid them. I think this comes down to Vick making one or two highlight film plays, McNabb making one or two "up for grabs" throws (that his team doesn't grab), and the pressure just being too much for the Eagles.
Falcons 23, Eagles 18
The question that begs to be asked is “Will the aforementioned snow and wind slow down Vick enough to make him a non factor?” I see the Falcons as a one dimensional team: Vick. With poor weather in the forecast, Vick becomes human. Don’t be surprised if the grass is a little thicker this week either. All year long I’ve bet against Philly. I’ve been certain that they are not as good as they’re given credit for. All year long I’ve been wrong. I’m picking Philly, but I’m rooting for the human highlight film. I’ve decided I hate Philly.
Eagles 24 – Vicks 10
Pats (-3) over STEELERS
Forecast: Snow and wind. It's a little surprising that the Pats are a 3 point favorite on the road to the #1 seed, but I think that's probably a reaction to the way the betting is going. Everybody is taking the Pats. What is fresh in everybody's mind is their dismantling of the Colts and Pittburgh's close call against the Jets. Nobody remembers that the Steelers pretty much man-handled the New England back in week 8. But a couple things to remember: Corey Dillon didn't play. And the Pats O-line was banged up. This time, they have Dillon back, and their line healthy. They have the confidence and swagger. They have the linebackers and defensive schemes to make Big Ben's life miserable. He looked awful last week against the Jets. This week he says he's going to play without the gloves he wore. The gloves won't be the issue. The defense will be.
Oh, and I'll repeat this line I sent to Jon earlier in the week:
During last week's Steelers-Jets game, they flashed the stat that there's never been a 50+ yarder kicked at Heinz Field.
Paging Mr. Vinatieri... Mr. Vinatieri...the history books are on Line 1.
Patriots 16, Steelers 13
That line started at 2 and jumped a point. Tells you that the smart money is on the Pats. St. Ides has to post his “Big Ben is really Trent Dilfer” postulate. After I read that, I was convinced too. Here’s my take: if Peyton Manning couldn’t score on the Pats, what in the name of Christ is Roethlisberger going to do? Maybe the Steelers keep it close with their D. Maybe Bettis (who gets the start) can grind out some yards. Ultimately the Patriots are the class of the league and find a way to win.
Patriots 13 – Steelers 6. P.S.: take the under.
(Editor's note: The St. Ides “Big Ben is really Trent Dilfer” postulate appears in the previous post about Super Bowl Hype. :P )
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Hyping the Super Bowl Hype
Well, we're down to the Final Four. And our picks so far have been fairly mediocre these playoffs. (St. Ides with an abysmal 2-6 record, Samichlaus at 5-3.) So, heading into the weekend, Samichlaus asked me the following question regarding Super Bowl hype:
"What's worse: Vick hype or Rothlesberger hype? Christ, imagine if Atlanta plays Pittsburgh? I might have to block ESPN for 2 weeks on the dish..."
So I decided to break down the hype for all 4 remaining teams...
I think the Ben hype is worse. For one simple reason: He hasn't really done jack sh1t yet to deserve it. Yes, his team won the first 13 games or whatever that he started. But they did it with an awesome D and running game. Imagine, if you will, if the year the Ravens won the Super Bowl that Trent Dilfer were a rookie. He managed the games, didn't make mistakes, and was an efficient passer when needed. What happened? He was a journeyman so he got almost no hype and wasn't even re-signed after they won the Super Bowl. Just because this kid's a rookie he's getting hyped like crazy. How many highlight film plays can you remember him making this season? Maybe one or two? Hell, I can't even think of one right now.
Meanwhile, Vick, although he's still not a great passer, he's a frickin human highlight reel. Even when the game was out of hand, he was spinning and juking in the backfield, and even took a hard hit or two which made me wonder why the heck he was still in the game.
The Super Bowl hype will get annoying no matter which way it turns out.. it always is. And the worst part is it's so frickin predictable and uncreative it's not funny. So here's a preview:
Eagles: McNabb as finally "taking the next step". The Eagles finally getting past the NFC title game, and how they can maybe finally bring a championship home. Comparisons to the Red Sox this year of a team that often fell JUST short of the title.
Falcons: Vick, Vick, and more Vick. Jim Mora, Jr. and what a great coach he is and at least one father-son interview, possibly with Mora Sr. breaking into tears. Their "underappreciated" defense and running game. Linebacker Keith Brooking (cause he's white).
Pats: Dynasty? Belichek as a genius and the best coach in the NFL. Their hard-working defense with no true "stars". Brady as the next Montana.
Steelers: Ben, Ben, and more Ben. The Bus as one of the greatest RBs ever. Cowher and the scowl, and how the Steelers have come up short several times recently too. And at least 3 pieces on how this is the return of the "Steel Curtain" defense.
There, i just provided all the sports networks and websites with 2 weeks worth of topics in about 5 minutes. They should really make me a frickin editor or something.
"What's worse: Vick hype or Rothlesberger hype? Christ, imagine if Atlanta plays Pittsburgh? I might have to block ESPN for 2 weeks on the dish..."
So I decided to break down the hype for all 4 remaining teams...
I think the Ben hype is worse. For one simple reason: He hasn't really done jack sh1t yet to deserve it. Yes, his team won the first 13 games or whatever that he started. But they did it with an awesome D and running game. Imagine, if you will, if the year the Ravens won the Super Bowl that Trent Dilfer were a rookie. He managed the games, didn't make mistakes, and was an efficient passer when needed. What happened? He was a journeyman so he got almost no hype and wasn't even re-signed after they won the Super Bowl. Just because this kid's a rookie he's getting hyped like crazy. How many highlight film plays can you remember him making this season? Maybe one or two? Hell, I can't even think of one right now.
Meanwhile, Vick, although he's still not a great passer, he's a frickin human highlight reel. Even when the game was out of hand, he was spinning and juking in the backfield, and even took a hard hit or two which made me wonder why the heck he was still in the game.
The Super Bowl hype will get annoying no matter which way it turns out.. it always is. And the worst part is it's so frickin predictable and uncreative it's not funny. So here's a preview:
Eagles: McNabb as finally "taking the next step". The Eagles finally getting past the NFC title game, and how they can maybe finally bring a championship home. Comparisons to the Red Sox this year of a team that often fell JUST short of the title.
Falcons: Vick, Vick, and more Vick. Jim Mora, Jr. and what a great coach he is and at least one father-son interview, possibly with Mora Sr. breaking into tears. Their "underappreciated" defense and running game. Linebacker Keith Brooking (cause he's white).
Pats: Dynasty? Belichek as a genius and the best coach in the NFL. Their hard-working defense with no true "stars". Brady as the next Montana.
Steelers: Ben, Ben, and more Ben. The Bus as one of the greatest RBs ever. Cowher and the scowl, and how the Steelers have come up short several times recently too. And at least 3 pieces on how this is the return of the "Steel Curtain" defense.
There, i just provided all the sports networks and websites with 2 weeks worth of topics in about 5 minutes. They should really make me a frickin editor or something.
Saturday, January 15, 2005
Divisional Playoff Round
Yes, we've been slacking a bit. Yes, we've been watching football and talking about it. And yes, we know you've anxiously awaited our latest words o' wisdom. Wait no more... Last week: St. Ides went 1-3 last week. Samichlaus went 3-1.
Although Samichlaus picked the wrong winner in the Seahawks and Packers game, his final score predictions didn't have them covering.
This week:
STEELERS (-9.5) over the Jets
Let's face it. The Jets are pretty lucky to have won last week. Between Barton's bone-headed forearm to the head that gave the Chargers a second life and the missed field goal in overtime, they deserved to lose. Pennington played pretty well, but I don't think he has another game like that in him. Pretty big spread, which scares me a little. But let's try again: Jets lose big.
Steelers 30, Jets 16.
I totally misjudged the Jets last week. I had them folding up against the Bolts... so much for my prognasticatability. Perhaps my clairvoyance was just a week behind...
Steelers 38, Jets 10
FALCONS (-7.5) over the Rams
The Rams got pretty lucky too. Seattle catches a few more of those balls (including the game-ending one in the end zone), and Mike Martz might be looking for a new job right now. Instead, we get treated to another weekend of his smug smile on the sidelines as Bulger tries to bail his ass out again. Rams only turned it over once last week, which is very atypical for them. The Falcons defense is much better than the Seahawks defense. Prediction: Rams throw 3 picks and fumble 2 more away. Oh, and then there's that Vick guy that nobody can stop when he's on. And in the playoffs, I'm willing to bet he'll be on.
Falcons 34, Rams 24
I think that the Birds and Vick are overrated. Then again, I'm surrounded by rednecks and Hokie fanassholes. Hey, That's two words I've invented.
Rams 27 - Falcons 10
Vikings (+8.5) over the EAGLES
This is exactly the game I was hoping Seattle would get against a rusty Eagles team with a ton of pressure on them. Instead, a fired up Randy Moss and company get the privelege. It'll be interesting to see how the Eagles D handles this explosive Vikings offense. But the difference will be the Eagles missing TO just too much. Their other receivers just can't get it done. And I think we might be hearing some rumblings about how the receivers dropped too many passes after this one. The Vikings will be looking to stop the running game, and should be able to. I'm not a big fan of the Vikings or Mike Tice, and I'm very tempted to take the Eagles just on Andy Reid alone, but I think they choke it away. Even if the Eagles pull it out, I don't think they cover.
Vikings 34, Eagles 31
Moss is hurt, Eagles are rested. This could backfire but I'm soaring with the Eagles..
Eagles 24 - Viqueens 13
Colts (+2.5) over the PATS
This is the big game. Some people are actually hyping this game as the winner will win the Super Bowl. Not sure about that, but this could be the most exciting game of the whole postseason (including the Super Bowl). So, who do we go with? On one hand you have the defending World Champions, a brilliant coaching staff, a defense that always gives Manning problems, and a quarterback who is on the verge of legendary status very early in his career. On the other hand you have an offense that's set all kinds of records, an improving defense, a quarterback who just had the best regular season of all-time, and a team that is looking to defeat its nemesis and move on to the next level. Throw in a few more factors: New England cold weather (and rumors the grounds crew is purposely leaving the field a bit swampy to try and slow down the Colts). The New England secondary still very banged up.And has the Boston area used up all its mojo to pull out that Red Sox win? This one really is a tough call. I'm going to say the Pats pull it out on a last second field goal by Vinateri, but they don't cover.
Patriots 31, Colts 30
The only thing melting in Foxboro this weekend is the evil one, Satan's left hand man Peyton Manning. Bellichik is in his head.
Pats 28 - Colts 17
Although Samichlaus picked the wrong winner in the Seahawks and Packers game, his final score predictions didn't have them covering.
This week:
STEELERS (-9.5) over the Jets
Let's face it. The Jets are pretty lucky to have won last week. Between Barton's bone-headed forearm to the head that gave the Chargers a second life and the missed field goal in overtime, they deserved to lose. Pennington played pretty well, but I don't think he has another game like that in him. Pretty big spread, which scares me a little. But let's try again: Jets lose big.
Steelers 30, Jets 16.
I totally misjudged the Jets last week. I had them folding up against the Bolts... so much for my prognasticatability. Perhaps my clairvoyance was just a week behind...
Steelers 38, Jets 10
FALCONS (-7.5) over the Rams
The Rams got pretty lucky too. Seattle catches a few more of those balls (including the game-ending one in the end zone), and Mike Martz might be looking for a new job right now. Instead, we get treated to another weekend of his smug smile on the sidelines as Bulger tries to bail his ass out again. Rams only turned it over once last week, which is very atypical for them. The Falcons defense is much better than the Seahawks defense. Prediction: Rams throw 3 picks and fumble 2 more away. Oh, and then there's that Vick guy that nobody can stop when he's on. And in the playoffs, I'm willing to bet he'll be on.
Falcons 34, Rams 24
I think that the Birds and Vick are overrated. Then again, I'm surrounded by rednecks and Hokie fanassholes. Hey, That's two words I've invented.
Rams 27 - Falcons 10
Vikings (+8.5) over the EAGLES
This is exactly the game I was hoping Seattle would get against a rusty Eagles team with a ton of pressure on them. Instead, a fired up Randy Moss and company get the privelege. It'll be interesting to see how the Eagles D handles this explosive Vikings offense. But the difference will be the Eagles missing TO just too much. Their other receivers just can't get it done. And I think we might be hearing some rumblings about how the receivers dropped too many passes after this one. The Vikings will be looking to stop the running game, and should be able to. I'm not a big fan of the Vikings or Mike Tice, and I'm very tempted to take the Eagles just on Andy Reid alone, but I think they choke it away. Even if the Eagles pull it out, I don't think they cover.
Vikings 34, Eagles 31
Moss is hurt, Eagles are rested. This could backfire but I'm soaring with the Eagles..
Eagles 24 - Viqueens 13
Colts (+2.5) over the PATS
This is the big game. Some people are actually hyping this game as the winner will win the Super Bowl. Not sure about that, but this could be the most exciting game of the whole postseason (including the Super Bowl). So, who do we go with? On one hand you have the defending World Champions, a brilliant coaching staff, a defense that always gives Manning problems, and a quarterback who is on the verge of legendary status very early in his career. On the other hand you have an offense that's set all kinds of records, an improving defense, a quarterback who just had the best regular season of all-time, and a team that is looking to defeat its nemesis and move on to the next level. Throw in a few more factors: New England cold weather (and rumors the grounds crew is purposely leaving the field a bit swampy to try and slow down the Colts). The New England secondary still very banged up.And has the Boston area used up all its mojo to pull out that Red Sox win? This one really is a tough call. I'm going to say the Pats pull it out on a last second field goal by Vinateri, but they don't cover.
Patriots 31, Colts 30
The only thing melting in Foxboro this weekend is the evil one, Satan's left hand man Peyton Manning. Bellichik is in his head.
Pats 28 - Colts 17
Friday, January 7, 2005
Wild Card Picks
It's playoff time! Woohoo! I'll cut the BS and get straight to the picks...
St. Ides in blue, Samichlaus in green.
SEAHAWKS (-4) over Rams
Well, I usually pick against the Seahawks to provide a little emotional comfort for when they lose. I could always say, "Well, yeah, they lost.. But at least I picked against them and got a win in my pools!" Not this time. I really and truly believe they are exactly where they need to be to go on a run: The media bashing them for not "deserving" to win a division title, nobody left on their pre-season bandwagon, a little bit of controversy with Alexander's "backstabbed" comment after he came up a yard short of the rushing title, and a team that still has enough offensive talent to really light up the scoreboard. Plus the Rams still have Mike Martz coaching them.
Plus we get gems like this one from ESPN: http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/playoffs04/columns/story?columnist=clayton_john&id=1959787 Here's a little quote from "expert" John Clayton: "It's actually hard to figure out why the Seahawks are favored by four points. The Rams have their number." Well, John, here's why: The Rams have Mike Martz coaching them and have lost to the likes of Miami. The only reason they are even in the playoffs is because the Jets suck and the Eagles mailed it in on Monday night two weeks ago. The Rams SHOULD have lost to Seattle in week 5, as they were behind 17 late in the 4th before the collapse. This Ray Rhodes defense will NOT collapse again, and I have a strange feeling they'll play an inspired game and force several turnovers. Chad Brown will be back. Grant Wistrom might even be back, which would be huge lift. The Seahawks haven't won a playoff game in 20 years. 20 years. I was 10 at the time. And, honestly, I don't even remember it. They're due. Seattle 34, Rams 26.
This is the time of year when I most question my own judgment. As I pondered this game, I began to think that the Seahawks are better than I give them credit for and the Rams are worse than I give them credit for. Especially the Rams. I look at that team, close my eyes, and imagine it’s five years ago. Then I pick them to win. On the other hand, I perceive Seattle to be the team that (a) drops passes, (b) has defensive collapses and (c) says dopey things like “We want the ball and we’re gonna score! Wheeeeee!!!!” Well, Seattle won the division and yes the Rams beat them twice, but this time I think they pull it out. I’m taking Holmgren over Martz by 3 in what will turn out to be the best game of the weekend.
Seattle 34, Rams 31
CHARGERS (-6.5) over Jets
The Jets just aren't that good. They proved this last week by losing to the Rams, a game they thought they needed to make the playoffs. Buffalo losing let them "back in" (as everybody loves saying) into the playoffs. The Jets just aren't as good as their record indicates. Pennington has a weak arm. Curtis Martin was the oldest RB to ever win the rushing title (and he barely did), and the only RB to ever win it without a single run over 25 yards all season. Oh, and the Jets only beat 2 playoff teams all season - the Chargers in week 2 before they came together, and the Seahawks. The best part about this game will be the Pennington and Herm Edwards interviews after they get dismantled. Will they be hostile, or humble? Chargers 30, Jets 16.
What’s strange about this game, and I’m saying this as someone that is at worst indifferent about the Jets and at best will root for them because my Cousin likes them, is I see a total Jets collapse. Call it a hunch, call it intuition, but I think that the Jets (in light of their week 2 victory over the Bolts) will be completely unprepared, and the Bolts are going to have their orgasm. It’s a pull it out of the ass and come on the face of the Jets victory for the Chargers.
Chargers 41, Jets 10
COLTS (-10) over Broncos
10 points is a LOT to give in the playoffs... Even for a ridiculously potent offense like the Colts. I picked the Broncos originally, and really should pick them and want to pick them. But until I see Jake Plummer win a game that matters (and beating the 3rd stringers last week doesn't count), I will continue to bet against him. Dwight Freeney ought to be able to get enough pressure on Jake to force 2-4 picks, and that's just enough for the Colts to win by 2 TDs. Colts 38, Broncos 24.
I must be mad, because there’s a little voice inside my head going “The Broncos are going to WIN!!!!” Yup, lets just call that insanity. Can’t happen, right? That’s still Jake Plummer out there. Besides, Indy is a first round wrecking ball. One final historical lesson I learned years ago… one Monday night my cousin and I had some money on the Broncos for a MNF game. The Broncos were having a dominant year. They were playing a mediocre team and the spread was really low. Easy money. So we sit at the bar like always and the bartender says “Who do you boys have tonight?” and we gleefully reply in the gayest unison “The Broncos!” He just smiled, drew us a couple of beers and quietly said “They suck on the road”. They lost that night…
Colts 38, Broncos 17
PACKERS (-6) over Vikings
The press is making a big deal about how it's hard to beat the same team 3 times in a single season, but the numbers don't support that argument. I believe I read that out of 8 times a team had a chance for the 3-game sweep since the NFL went to the current Wild Card format, it's happened 4 times. That's half the time for you who have trouble with math. So, let's stick with the scientific approach and say it follows the 50/50 trend: Rams fail to complete the 3-game sweep of Seattle, and the Packers pull it off. I'm happy, Mr. Samichlaus is happy, and both Mikes Tice and Martz can get an early start on their golf games. Maybe Wayne Fontes is available to give them some pointers. Throw in Samichlaus's insider tip from last week about the Vikes sucking outdoors (which they continued with by losing in Washington), and the Packers D holds up just well enough to cover. Packers 31, Vikings 24.
St. Ides needs to check his stats. The sweepers are 10-5 against the sweepees in post season play so ol’ St. Nick here is happier still. This game goes one of two ways: Packers win big or Packers win small. I’m going with the latter for 2 reasons. First, as much as I love the Green and Gold, folks this team just isn’t very good. The offense has been awesome, but the defense has been terrible. Although there are some talented players, there are few playmakers. Second, the Vikings play loose against the Packers. In fact the Vikings could have won either game this year. I think it’s going to come down to the last drive: Packers ball, about a minute and a half to go, score tied at 31, Favre brings them down field and with 4 seconds left Ryan Longwell trots out from 42….
Packers 34, Vikings 31.
St. Ides in blue, Samichlaus in green.
SEAHAWKS (-4) over Rams
Well, I usually pick against the Seahawks to provide a little emotional comfort for when they lose. I could always say, "Well, yeah, they lost.. But at least I picked against them and got a win in my pools!" Not this time. I really and truly believe they are exactly where they need to be to go on a run: The media bashing them for not "deserving" to win a division title, nobody left on their pre-season bandwagon, a little bit of controversy with Alexander's "backstabbed" comment after he came up a yard short of the rushing title, and a team that still has enough offensive talent to really light up the scoreboard. Plus the Rams still have Mike Martz coaching them.
Plus we get gems like this one from ESPN: http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/playoffs04/columns/story?columnist=clayton_john&id=1959787 Here's a little quote from "expert" John Clayton: "It's actually hard to figure out why the Seahawks are favored by four points. The Rams have their number." Well, John, here's why: The Rams have Mike Martz coaching them and have lost to the likes of Miami. The only reason they are even in the playoffs is because the Jets suck and the Eagles mailed it in on Monday night two weeks ago. The Rams SHOULD have lost to Seattle in week 5, as they were behind 17 late in the 4th before the collapse. This Ray Rhodes defense will NOT collapse again, and I have a strange feeling they'll play an inspired game and force several turnovers. Chad Brown will be back. Grant Wistrom might even be back, which would be huge lift. The Seahawks haven't won a playoff game in 20 years. 20 years. I was 10 at the time. And, honestly, I don't even remember it. They're due. Seattle 34, Rams 26.
This is the time of year when I most question my own judgment. As I pondered this game, I began to think that the Seahawks are better than I give them credit for and the Rams are worse than I give them credit for. Especially the Rams. I look at that team, close my eyes, and imagine it’s five years ago. Then I pick them to win. On the other hand, I perceive Seattle to be the team that (a) drops passes, (b) has defensive collapses and (c) says dopey things like “We want the ball and we’re gonna score! Wheeeeee!!!!” Well, Seattle won the division and yes the Rams beat them twice, but this time I think they pull it out. I’m taking Holmgren over Martz by 3 in what will turn out to be the best game of the weekend.
Seattle 34, Rams 31
CHARGERS (-6.5) over Jets
The Jets just aren't that good. They proved this last week by losing to the Rams, a game they thought they needed to make the playoffs. Buffalo losing let them "back in" (as everybody loves saying) into the playoffs. The Jets just aren't as good as their record indicates. Pennington has a weak arm. Curtis Martin was the oldest RB to ever win the rushing title (and he barely did), and the only RB to ever win it without a single run over 25 yards all season. Oh, and the Jets only beat 2 playoff teams all season - the Chargers in week 2 before they came together, and the Seahawks. The best part about this game will be the Pennington and Herm Edwards interviews after they get dismantled. Will they be hostile, or humble? Chargers 30, Jets 16.
What’s strange about this game, and I’m saying this as someone that is at worst indifferent about the Jets and at best will root for them because my Cousin likes them, is I see a total Jets collapse. Call it a hunch, call it intuition, but I think that the Jets (in light of their week 2 victory over the Bolts) will be completely unprepared, and the Bolts are going to have their orgasm. It’s a pull it out of the ass and come on the face of the Jets victory for the Chargers.
Chargers 41, Jets 10
COLTS (-10) over Broncos
10 points is a LOT to give in the playoffs... Even for a ridiculously potent offense like the Colts. I picked the Broncos originally, and really should pick them and want to pick them. But until I see Jake Plummer win a game that matters (and beating the 3rd stringers last week doesn't count), I will continue to bet against him. Dwight Freeney ought to be able to get enough pressure on Jake to force 2-4 picks, and that's just enough for the Colts to win by 2 TDs. Colts 38, Broncos 24.
I must be mad, because there’s a little voice inside my head going “The Broncos are going to WIN!!!!” Yup, lets just call that insanity. Can’t happen, right? That’s still Jake Plummer out there. Besides, Indy is a first round wrecking ball. One final historical lesson I learned years ago… one Monday night my cousin and I had some money on the Broncos for a MNF game. The Broncos were having a dominant year. They were playing a mediocre team and the spread was really low. Easy money. So we sit at the bar like always and the bartender says “Who do you boys have tonight?” and we gleefully reply in the gayest unison “The Broncos!” He just smiled, drew us a couple of beers and quietly said “They suck on the road”. They lost that night…
Colts 38, Broncos 17
PACKERS (-6) over Vikings
The press is making a big deal about how it's hard to beat the same team 3 times in a single season, but the numbers don't support that argument. I believe I read that out of 8 times a team had a chance for the 3-game sweep since the NFL went to the current Wild Card format, it's happened 4 times. That's half the time for you who have trouble with math. So, let's stick with the scientific approach and say it follows the 50/50 trend: Rams fail to complete the 3-game sweep of Seattle, and the Packers pull it off. I'm happy, Mr. Samichlaus is happy, and both Mikes Tice and Martz can get an early start on their golf games. Maybe Wayne Fontes is available to give them some pointers. Throw in Samichlaus's insider tip from last week about the Vikes sucking outdoors (which they continued with by losing in Washington), and the Packers D holds up just well enough to cover. Packers 31, Vikings 24.
St. Ides needs to check his stats. The sweepers are 10-5 against the sweepees in post season play so ol’ St. Nick here is happier still. This game goes one of two ways: Packers win big or Packers win small. I’m going with the latter for 2 reasons. First, as much as I love the Green and Gold, folks this team just isn’t very good. The offense has been awesome, but the defense has been terrible. Although there are some talented players, there are few playmakers. Second, the Vikings play loose against the Packers. In fact the Vikings could have won either game this year. I think it’s going to come down to the last drive: Packers ball, about a minute and a half to go, score tied at 31, Favre brings them down field and with 4 seconds left Ryan Longwell trots out from 42….
Packers 34, Vikings 31.
Monday, January 3, 2005
And we're in! It's playoff time!
Happy new year!
Okay, so we knew last week that Seattle would be in the playoffs at least as a wild card. But it took a close finish yesterday to secure the division title, and the right to host the Rams next weekend...
Well, so much for my theory that you can't play divisional rivals in the first round.... I guess that only applies in baseball...
I was kind of rooting for the Rams to lose so Seattle would have gotten the Vikings instead (and Green Bay would have gotten the Saints), but oh well. I feel pretty good about playing the Rams again at home. I mean, come on, the Rams and Mike Martz just won their last two games against playoff-bound teams (although the Eagles were playing their scrubs).. Do you really think he can keep that up?
In related but unrelated news, Shaun Alexander came up one yard short of winning the rushing title. On the final Seattle scoring drive, they had the ball 3rd and goal from the 1. And Hasselbeck ran a sneak... Giving the ball to Alexander there would have tied him for the rushing title with Curtis Martin. Now there were about 5 minutes left, so all the defense needs is a decent stop and they'll get the ball back and can get him 2 yards for the title. But it never happened. On one hand, it's a shame he didn't get it because he has been a workhorse and deserved it. On the other hand, being a free agent at the end of the season, you KNOW he would use that as leverage for a few extra million dollars.
Early spreads for next weekend's games:
Seattle -4 Rams
Chargers -6 Jets
Indy -8.5 Broncos
Packers -6 Vikes
Two other things going in both Seattle and Green Bay's favor: no 8-8 team has ever won a playoff game. And no team who has lost their final two regular season games has won a Super Bowl (Atlanta, Philly).
We'll wait til later in the week for playoff picks, but just to wrap things up, here are our final regular season picks records:
Samichlaus: 33-29 (Last week: 11-5)
St. Ides: 32-30 (Last week: 11-5)
Okay, so we knew last week that Seattle would be in the playoffs at least as a wild card. But it took a close finish yesterday to secure the division title, and the right to host the Rams next weekend...
Well, so much for my theory that you can't play divisional rivals in the first round.... I guess that only applies in baseball...
I was kind of rooting for the Rams to lose so Seattle would have gotten the Vikings instead (and Green Bay would have gotten the Saints), but oh well. I feel pretty good about playing the Rams again at home. I mean, come on, the Rams and Mike Martz just won their last two games against playoff-bound teams (although the Eagles were playing their scrubs).. Do you really think he can keep that up?
In related but unrelated news, Shaun Alexander came up one yard short of winning the rushing title. On the final Seattle scoring drive, they had the ball 3rd and goal from the 1. And Hasselbeck ran a sneak... Giving the ball to Alexander there would have tied him for the rushing title with Curtis Martin. Now there were about 5 minutes left, so all the defense needs is a decent stop and they'll get the ball back and can get him 2 yards for the title. But it never happened. On one hand, it's a shame he didn't get it because he has been a workhorse and deserved it. On the other hand, being a free agent at the end of the season, you KNOW he would use that as leverage for a few extra million dollars.
Early spreads for next weekend's games:
Seattle -4 Rams
Chargers -6 Jets
Indy -8.5 Broncos
Packers -6 Vikes
Two other things going in both Seattle and Green Bay's favor: no 8-8 team has ever won a playoff game. And no team who has lost their final two regular season games has won a Super Bowl (Atlanta, Philly).
We'll wait til later in the week for playoff picks, but just to wrap things up, here are our final regular season picks records:
Samichlaus: 33-29 (Last week: 11-5)
St. Ides: 32-30 (Last week: 11-5)
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