Quick hitter on Hutchinson...

Regular readers to SBS know it's no secret that Steve Hutchinson's defection to the Viqueens left a bitter taste on St. Ides's beer soaked taste buds. For what its worth, the conventional wisdom in the NFL seems to think that not only did Minnesota overpay for him, but that Hutchinson simply isn't as good as he used to be.

This from JSOnline's Bob McGinn:

The Packers will get their first look at guard Steve Hutchinson in a Vikings' uniform. Minnesota gave Hutchinson $16 million in bonuses this season in a transition free-agent offer that the Seahawks declined to match. "Not in a million years would I pay that guy $49 million," an opposing defensive coach said. "You can get away without having tremendous guards. He's a pretty good guard, but it's not like he comes off and mauls people. When he gets his hands on you he can block pretty good." One scout used the word "solid" to describe Hutchinson's season. "He's not playing what he was last year in Seattle," the scout said. "Whether that's a comfort level with who he's playing with, I don't know. In Seattle, he was just a road grader. He has been good, that's it. Before I thought he was outstanding. He's not what he was in Seattle."

Truth be told, Hutchinson isn't making an impact in Minnesota, and he probably wouldn't be adding much in Seattle.

For the love of Anonymous: The picks are posted! All of 'em! No, Seriously!

Some comments I sent to Anonymous after watching Monday Night Football:

I think Christian Slater was stoned, drunk, or both. He was making next to no sense. And what the hell was that veiled reference to Suzy Kolber about? Weird.

Gotta love the pump fake. I don't know why more pro QBs don't do it. In today's NFL, DBs are ALWAYS looking to make the big play and peeking into the backfield, ready to jump the route. Two weeks in a row, Seneca Wallace has done the old "pump fake short, throw deep" play. Both times it resuled in TDs. Last week, Ty Law (who still gets alllllllllllllllll my love) was so faked out, he fell down. This week, Deion Branch didn't even turn around to try and sell the pump fake. He just ran a patten right for the corner cone, and thanks to the pump fake, he was wide open. Long live the pump fake!

Tony Kornhole brings nothing to the table. Nothing. Well almost nothing. At least it's somewhat entertaining when he calls out Thiesmann for ridiculous comments. Oh, and we're sick of hearing "I have him on my Fantasy Team!" every week. Either he's A) lying or B) purposely playing someone that plays on Monday night every single week JUST so he can say that. I'm not sure which is worse.

And speaking of the bad announcers, two things last night annoyed me. Well, three things. We know the Raiders are bad. We get it. No need to say it every 10 seconds.

Then going into halftime, they said "Well, at least the Raiders get the ball the second half." "Oh, that's about the only good thing I could say about their offense." See point one above. We get it. They're bad. But not only that, you're WRONG! Raiders got the opening kickoff. Seahawks got the ball to start the second half.

And lastly, late in the 4th quarter with the Raiders putting together some semblence of a drive, they face a 3rd and 20. Throw to Moss, who at first looks to make the catch rolling out of bounds. But nope, incomplete. He dropped it as he was falling out of bounds. They replayed this play about 6 ot 7 times. They talked about whether or not he caught it. They mentioned it again several times a little later on when pointing out how Moss had a bad game and didn't step up. But the thing they pretty much just glided right over was a pretty important fact: there was a penalty on the play. Illegal shift on Oakland. The play wouldn't have counted even had he caught it. SO THESE EFFIN MORONS SPENT LIKE 10 MINUTES ANALYZING AND REPAYING A NON-CATCH THAT WOULDN'T HAVE COUNTED ANYWAYS!!!! Ugh.

Hey, you know what would be a great idea? Get this: you should start a sports blog! Yeah, instead of sending emails to your friend Anonymous, you could post your thoughts on your sports blog! Then Anonymous and all of your other friends could read your blog and post comments too! It’s just like the email except everyone participates! Wow, I can’t believe we hadn’t thought of that before!

OK, enough smartassing. The reader has spoken and so here I am on Thursday night taking valuable family time to write my gambling predictions. Well, I’m writing and chatting with my wife so this could get interesting. Anyway, I’ve been meaning to write about Green Bay and low and behold my wife told a great story about the trip on her blog! So check out Mrs. Samichlaus's Blog by clicking here and I swear one of these days I’ll tell you all about meeting Fuzzy Thurston…..

Last Week:
Samichlaus: 7-7
St. Ides: 4-10

Overall:
Samichlaus: 51-47
St. Ides: 45-53

Bye weeks are over, woohooo! Full slate of 16 games every week from here on out...

EAGLES -6.5 over Redskins
Redskins got a win they needed badly last week against the Cowboys, but they're still going nowhere. Eagles got off to a great start, but have cooled off recently. Divisional game at home should be just what they need to get going again. Eagles 26, Skins 17.

The Redskins got a huge win last week against the Cowboys, a game I had a funny feeling about, and the mood in Redskin country has been somewhere between thrilled and ecstatic. I don’t think the Skins are good enough to beat Philly in Philly, but I think they keep it close. Eagles 27 Redskins 24


Niners +5.5 over LIONS
Let me beat him to it: "It's the Samichlaus Stinker of the Week!" Both teams are pretty bad, yet both teams beat "good" (and I use that term loosely) teams at home last week. Niners beat the Vikings, Lions beat the Falcons. Lions probably pull this out, but are bad enough to not cover. Lions 24, Niners 23.

Hey, ya got me! So I'll beat you to the posting.... Agreed, this one will have lower ratings than the Packer game. St. Ides nailed the Lions last week and got a win, and it was a big enough win to think they’ll do it again AND cover. Lions 24 Niners 17


VIKINGS -5.5 over Packers
Speaking of the Viqueens... Seems like just a few weeks ago I was telling a worried Anonymous that the Vikings suck. Their offense is awful. They only beat the Seahawks thanks to a horrendous defensive effort and Hasselbeck being knocked out of the game. And I think they showed it last week by laying an egg in San Fran. That said, their defense is decent, and may be enough to keep them in this game until that seemingly inevitable Favre turnover late in the game. I actually had the Packers game on last week when he threw that pick on the 1. Ouch. Take that away and the last second fumble against the Rams, and the Packers could be 5-3 right now. Vikings 17, Packers 10.

I watched an absolutely unbelievable Packer performance last week. They hands down dominated the Bills in every aspect of the game, except one: four motherfucking killer turnovers. The Favre interception that St. Ides saw was all Brett. He thought he could look off a veteran linebacker on a slant to Donald Driver (like they never run THAT play) and was easily picked. The other three turnovers? A botched snap by Scott Wells (who got a big contract extension this week), another botched snap by Scott Wells (who did I mention got a big contract extension this week?), and a terrible call on a first and goal play: a (wait for it) slant to Donald Driver that was well defended tipped and picked off. Here’s the thing with young teams: they are never as good or as bad as they look.

I want to believe the Packers can win this game, really, but (wait, my wife is dancing around the ironing board and exposing herself…. OK, shows over…. Where was I?) I know that they won’t. Even when they were good they had a hard time in Minnesota. The Viqueens are tough against the run and the Packers are thin at receiver. Jennings reinjured his ankle last week and is questionable, so look for a game plan of short to medium passes to the likes of Shawn Bodiford and Ruvel Martin. In fact, don’t be surprised if you see a slant or two to Donald Driver. Viqueens 31 Packers 24


FALCONS -7.5 over Browns
Who can figure out the frickin Falcons? Not me. Browns played the Chargers tough last week, but I can't trust them. Falcons 26, Browns 17.

I think the Falcons are more consistent at home and the Browns are less consistent on the road. I see the Falcons having all the answers for anything the Browns throw at them. Throw in ol’ drippy pecker playing like a decent QB and the Falcons win and cover. PS: know who the highest paid player in the NFL is? Mike Vick and his Sick Dick. Mr "So fucking sue me for giving you an STD": 31 Browns 17


Bills +11.5 over COLTS
Has anybody noticed the Colts aren't really blowing teams out this year? Yet they still give double-digit points almost every game? I'm too lazy to look it up, but I'm thinking they're probably only like 4-4 against the spread this year. Too many big points to cover. Colts 28, Bills 17.

I can’t begin to tell you how bad the Bills looked for 58 minutes last week. However, they had a really good 2 minutes and evidently that’s all you need to beat the Packers. That’s not going to be enough to beat the Colts. Did I mention that Willis McGay-hee is out? Colts win easy: Colts 41 Bills 10

Chiefs -0.5 over DOLPHINS
Dolphins got to enjoy beating the Bears last week. Chiefs had a pretty nice showing to win in St. Louis, not a real easy place to play. I'm kinda liking what the Chiefs offense is doing right now, and suddenly my 8-1 odds for them to win the AFC don't seem so crazy. A steady diet of Larry Johnson with throws over the middle to a wide open Tony Gonzalez all day long. Chiefs 24, Dolphins 20.

Well I guess we were a little off on last weeks Dolphins game, eh? I’m thinking it’s a blip on the radar, and the Fins will go back to sucking eggs this week. Meanwhile the Chiefs have picked it up on the road and I’m kinda liking it too. Chiefs 24 Dolphins 17

PATRIOTS -10.5 over Jets
I get the funny feeling the Patriots will come out ready to take care of business after that debacle against the Colts. Patriots 31, Jets 10.

I agree: the Pats will win but I have a funny feeling about that half point… The Jets keep on keeping ‘em close and that’s good enough for me. Pats 30 Jets 20


BENGALS +1.5 over Chargers
This one follows the rule of "most desperate team". Bengals NEED to start winning or else they're not making the playoffs. Carson Palmer may be the best young quarterback in the league, but that injured knee has effected his mobility, and he's a sitting duck behind an underachieving offensive line. At least Shawn "I didn't know my supplemants contained illegal stuff" Merriman is sitting this out. Chargers are a damn good team, but the fact they let the Browns stick around last week makes me nervous. Bengals 27, Chargers 24.

I like the Bolts for several reasons. First, that bad knee is not only affecting Palmer’s mobility, it’s affecting his throwing motion. He’s not the same QB he was last year. Second, I’m betting that the Browns anomaly last week was a team playing down to the level of the competition. Young teams do that from time to time and the Chargers are a young team, I’m going with the Bolts: Chargers 31 Bengals 27


JAGUARS -10.5 over Texans
Last week I took the Titans and a crapload of points against the Jaguars. The Jags covered by like 30 points. I'll go the other way this week behind David Garrard or however you spell it. Maybe Leftwich was the reason why they didn't blow out these weak divisional opponents when they should have. Jaguars 32, Texans 20.

I’m getting tired of trying to figure out these two teams. David Carr keeps playing well, but that supporting cast leaves a lot to be desired. The Jags meanwhile impressed without the still injured Leftwich who I heard may be more injured than he’s letting on to. I’ll take the Jags at home: Jags 34 Texans 20

Broncos -9.5 over OAKLAND
Wow, the Raiders couldn't block anybody Monday night. Andrew Walter was getting hit from every side, and that was only with 4 rushing on several of the 9 sacks. 3rd string DE Craig Terrill had THREE sacks! Anyways, don't expect Oakland to do much of anything against this defense. Broncos 20, Raiders 3.

Okie dokie, do we agree now that the Raiders are god awful? Denver meanwhile has played better on the road and that’s enough for me. PS: Art Shell, not Joe Gibbs, is the worst coach in the NFL. Period. Broncos 37 Oakland13

Saints +3.5 over STEELERS
I'm still not quite convinced that the Saints are for real. But I'm pretty sure the Steelers are done. Saints 20, Steelers 17

I like the Saints here as well, but don’t count the Steelers out. If they’d only smarten up a bit and give the ball to Najeh Trenadius Monte Davenport. Well at least my wife would be happy (update: she sitting on the couch taking a cigarette break, listening to club mix that sounds eerily like the stuff they play at those chick clothing stores like “The Limited”… OK, back to ironing… no more titty sightings) I’ll take the Saints and the points: Steelers 24 Saints 23


Rams +3.5 over SEAHAWKS
No Hasselbeck. No Alexander. Seneca Wallace has played well so far, and the Rams aren't exactly a top defense. But the Seattle defense might be worse. And if this is a shootout (and games between these two usually are), I'll take Marc Bulger over Seneca Wallace. Only way the Seahawks win this game is if their defense plays as well as they did against the Raiders. And I don't see that happening. Rams 30, Seahawks 23.

I’ll go with St. Ides here. Even with the 12th man (that amazingly loud fan base… it’s got to be the coffee) Seattle is simply outmanned. The Rams pull the upset: Rams 31 Seahawks 21


CARDINALS +6.5 over Cowboys
Did you see TO dropping those passes last week? Including a sure TD? He sucks. Cardinals actually have a decent defense (keep in mind that when they blew that game against the Bears, it wasn't the defenses fault - it was turnovers by the offense and a punt return allowed on special teams). I like Tony Romo, and Leinart will probaby be getting his ass kicked all game. But I'll take the home points. Cowboys 23, Cardinals 17.

I’d love to get that sound bite of Tony Romo doing his Brett Favre impression… I like the kid too, he’s got some spunk. Meanwhile, I don’t know which Cardinals D is going to show up: the one that held the Bears in check or the one we saw Green Bay have its way with. Oh, and admit it, you know there’s going to be more Cowboy fans in the stands than Cardinal fans…. Boys 34 Birds 17

Bears +2.5 over GIANTS
Giants are without Strahan, Toomer, and now it looks like Plaxico Burress could be out too. I think that Osi guy is hurt too. Urlacher should be fine for the Bears. Bears should be ashamed of how they played last week. Grossman is still young and mistake prone is pressured. Problem with all the injuries is will they be able to get that pressure? Probably not. And Eli in primetime in a big game? He's a Manning. Nuff said. Bears 20, Giants 17.

Holy shit are the Giants banged up. Not only is Burress questionable but so is Sam Madison and Sinorice Moss amongst others. The Bears are going to be ready to play Sunday, while the Giants are hobbling. I’m rooting for the G-men but I’m betting on the Bears: Bears 17 Giants 13

Bucs +9.5 over PANTHERS
This game probably looked great on the schedule at the beginning of the year. Now? Not so much. Panthers are ridiculously inconsistent all around, and need this home win pretty badly against a divisional rival. I think think the Bucs keep it close. Panthers 27, Bucs 20.

Fuck, I don’t know. You think the Bucs will keep it close? Who am I to argue? I’m getting tired and this club music is giving me a headache, plus my ass itches and we’re out of Preparation H. Getting older totally sucks. What in living fuck are my 50’s and 60’s going to be like??? I shouldn’t complain though, my wife IS doing the ironing. Panthers 27 Bucs 23


Ravens -7.5 over TITANS
I'm jumping on the "Brian Billick - Offensive Genius" bandwagon now while there's still room. And before Steve McNair gets hurt, which brings Kyle Boller back in at QB. Who woulda thunk the Ravens would be running away with the AFC North? Ravens 33, Titans 16.

Man, that Ray Lewis just keeps killing ‘em you know? Yeah, gotta say I didn’t see this coming either, but I’m officially on the bandwagon. I’ll take the Ravens and the points: Ravens 34 Titans 20

Peace out from the Capital of the Confederacy and points north....

Week 9 Picks (In Two Acts) (Second Act now available!)

Back to reality. Just in case anybody thought after the previous week's uncanny 11-2 performance that maybe I'd figured things out a bit and knew what I was doing, here's a nice 4-10 record to prove I don't. I did pick 4 of the teams to win, but I expected them to not cover. Not that it matters, but yeah, my picks weren't really as bad as the record indicates, I just bought into the "take the points" idea a bit too much this week. Damn favorites are covering a lot so far this season.

This week doesn't get any easier, with 4 spreads of 9 points or more. Oh, and this is the last week with bye teams, so full schedules start again next week! And I think that whole "flexible Monday night game" thingy kicks in soon too, with the first game being Bears at Giants in a few weeks. I hope the Bears lose at some point. I'm sick of people kissing their ass.

"And that's why they call it gambling"... Felix Unger

The trip to Green Bay was invigorating for the Samichlaus family, as evidenced by my return to winning ways. We're at the midway point in the season and things are shaking out just as St. Ides said they would: unpredicatbly. We get half of 'em right and half of 'em wrong...

As far as the Bears are concerned: they'll lose to the Giants and NewEngland, they may lose to the Jets, and the Packers have a shot in Soldier Field the last week in December...

Last Week:
Samichlaus: 9-5
St. Ides: 4-10

Overall:
Samichlaus: 44-40
St. Ides: 41-43

Cowboys -3.5 over REDSKINS
Stick a fork in the Skins, they're done. Cowboys looked awful for 3 quarters last week, then somehow the much-praised Panthers defense fell apart and allowed a QB in his first NFL start to rip them apart. At one point during the game, the announcers were talking about how Romo grew up idolizing Favre. How when the Cowboys signed the o-lineman Rivera, Romo was pestering him about what it was like to play with Favre. And the announcers mentioned how Romo does a great impression. A few minutes later, they cut to a pre-recorded clip of the aforementioned impersonation. I have to say, it was pretty funny. I like Romo now. I still hate Parcells and TO though. But anyways, Brunell is toast, the Skins defense is garbage,and Gibbs will be back into retirement soon. Cowboys 27, Redskins 16.

I'm starting to believe that Joe Gibbs may be the worst coach in football. I live in Redskins country and what I'm hearing is that "Gibbs should call the plays" and "the assistant coaches are killing the team". That's secret code for "the head coach is doing a terrible job, but we can't admit it". With that said, I know the Skins are fired up this week. I think St. Ides's analysis is dead on, but I have a funny feeling about this.... Skins 24 Boys 23.

GIANTS -12.5 over Texans
I keep taking the huge spreads, and more often than not, the teams have covered. I don't have exact numbers, but it seems every time I take 10+ points, the team loses by like 40. Giants somehow found their groove. Texans have not. Giants 30, Texans 10.

The G-Men are pretty dinged up, and that's enough to keep this game close. The Texans are experiencing growing pains, and are moving to a cold climate, but are otherwise healthy. Giants by 10, not by 12.5 Giants 31 Texans 21

BEARS -13.5 over Dolphins
I took the Niners +16.5 over the Bears last week. I think it was something like 63-3 at halftime. I'm not making that mistake again. Not just one week later. Bears 69, Dolphins 0.

That's an absurd prediction and you know it. Bears 71 Dolphins 3

LIONS +5.5 over Falcons
Falcons have looked great. Vick is running wild and actually finding the open receiver (9 times out of 10, that's Alge Crumpler) for long passes. They're due for a little bit of a letdown game I think, and the Lions aren't really that bad... Are they? Falcons 26, Lions 21.

Yep, they are that bad. The Falcons convinced me that they can win on the road so I'm officially on the bandwagon. Vicks Sick Dangling Prick 27 Lions 17

Packers +3.5 over BILLS
The Packers are the only team in the league with 3 wins. Exactly 3 wins that is. They're also only one game worse than the Seahawks. Who woulda thunk? Seems Favre is starting to find his groove again. Not sure I'm ready to say the defense looks good, but not getting lit up by the Cardinals is a good sign. The Bills offense isn't very good, and their defense is having something of a youth movement. The Pack is heating up, maybe they can start thinking playoffs! The NFC is wide frickin open. Packers 24, Bills 17.

The Packers have never won in Buffalo. In fact I saw them get their asses kicked there in September of 2000. However they are an improving team. For one, the O line is mastering the zone blocking techinique and is opening up the running game. Last week both Ahman Green and Vernon Morency each rushed for 100 yards. The defense is playing better now that Ahmad Carroll is gone and Brett Favre is having fun (It was a thrill to be able to see Favre's first "Lambeau Leap" in person). Favre's been making better decisions in the passing game and gets back rookie sensation Greg Jennings who missed our game due to injury. Jennings, who is still in some pain, had this to say: ""I think I'll be able to go. I've been getting off the jam, which was the biggest issue going into the Arizona game. Every day I run on it, I'm sore. But that's to be expected. There's nobody in this league that's playing that's 100%. It's something I'm going to have to play with for the rest of the season." I love this kid. Is JP Losman still starting foir the Bills? Good. Packers 27 Bills 17

BUCS +1.5 over Saints
So maybe the Saints illusion has been shattered by the Ravens last week. Reggie Bush hurt his ankle too, though he's expected to play. Meanwhile the Bucs looked like they might have some life in them, before the Giants spanked them in the Meadowlands. Tough game to call, but I'm going with the idea the Saints aren't as good as their record, and the Bucs aren't as bad as theirs. Bucs 20, Saints 17.

Here's a hot news flash: as I predicted, Reggie Bush has not been an impact player. The Saints winning ways have more to do with a good D and Drew Brees. I like the Saints on the road against a team I just have no respect for. Saints 24 Bucs 2o

Chiefs +2.5 over RAMS
Let's play a little "who beat who" logic game, shall we? Chiefs beat the Seahawks. Seahawks beat the Rams. Chiefs beat the Chargers. Chargers spanked the Rams. Yes, both those Chiefs wins were in KC, where they have a big home field advantage. But the loss to Seattle was in their dome. Oh, and the Rams have one of the league's worst run defenses. Larry Johnson is just getting warmed up. The Chiefs D isn't exactly great, but the Rams will be lucky if they force 3 punts all game. Chiefs 37, Rams 35.

Trent Green is out for the Chiefs so that leaves Damon Hooha, err Huard, to run the team. Chiefs are 1-2 on the road. Rams are 2-1 at home. Rams are relatively healthy... Rams 34 Chiefs 27

RAVENS -3.5 over Bengals
The Bungles laid an egg at home against the Falcons. The Ravens just went in and kicked the Saints heineys in New Orleans. Brian Billick fired his friend and offensive coordinator Jim Fassel and called the plays last week. And everybody is crediting him for the offensive explosion. McNair played well enough (though he did get lucky a couple passes weren't picked off, including one of his touchdown passes that deflected off the hands of two defenders). Anyways, I'll buy into it for now. But just barely. Ravens 19, Bengals 13.

The Bengals and Carson Palmer are having a bit of a slump. St. Ides has this one nailed: the Ravens at home against a slumping Bengals team equals a win and a cover: Ravens 24 Bengals 19

Titans +9.5 over JAGUARS
Let's not forget the Jaguars lost to the Texans recently. For some reason, the Jaguars always have close games against their divisional rivals. Against the Colts, that's good, since you're keeping pace with one of the league's best teams. With the Texans and Titans.. that's not such a good thing. Jaguars 23, Titans 17.

Here lies the Samichlaus Stinker of the Week: two teams that I could not care less about. One is 4-3 while the other is 2-4. That's a good observation about the Jags playing it close against their division rivals, so I'll go with that as well. Titans cover.... Jags 26 Titans 20

NINERS +5.5 over Vikings
As I was telling Anonymous all last week, the Vikings are not that good. Then the Patriots proved it. They should have lost to the Lions but their defense saved them. They needed an awful game and a backup QB to beat Seattle. I think they can easily lose this game outright. Niners 20, Vikings 17.

San Fran's two wins came at home and I think that may be good enought to keep it close. Of course, Brad Johnson usually doesn't do anything to beat himself... I'll take San Fran and the points: Vikings 24 San Francisco 23.

CHARGERS -12.5 over Browns
Browns offense finally showed a pulse against the Jets. But even with Merriman out, the Chargers defense is decent. I'm tempted to take all those points and say there will be a garbage time TD to prevent the Chargers from covering... But I'll play it safe. Chargers 27, Browns 13.

I agree with the pick. The big difference is going to be the home field. And let me say for the record that without anybody's assistance or opinions, I believe that Philip Rivers is the best young quarterback in the league. I'll take the Bolts: San Diego 34 Browns 17

Broncos +2.5 over STEELERS
Look! It's the Super Bowl loser curse! Oh wait, the Steelers won... But yeah, Big Ben's disguise as a talented young QB is melting away quickly. Broncos have a good chance to bounce back after Manning had his way with them in Denver. Cowher doesn't have the jaw-jut going this year, and it's almost as if he's already thinking about his retirement after the season. No way do the Steelers make the playoffs. Broncos 26, Steelers 16.

That damn brain trauma is a sonofabitch, ain't it Ben? The Broncos are in a tight battle against the aforementioned Chargers and are now the more desperate team. I think it's time they make a statement game and prove once and for all that they don't suck on the road. Denver 27 Pittsburgh 20

PATRIOTS -2.5 over Colts
Here's what I wrote to Anonymous the other day:

"I'd lean towards Indy too, but just barely. When was the Broncos game, like Week 2 or 3? Brady was in still in disbelief that they traded Branch, and was clearly not comfortable with the receivers he had left. I think it's safe to say he's settled in with them now.

Despite Manning finally winning one against Brady last year, keep in mind he is still one of the biggest choke artists out there when it comes to big games. And no, I don't really consider last week's game a "big game". The Colts own the Broncos for some reason. So if the Colts lost, in Denver, it wouldn't mean much. However, if they lose to the Patriots YET AGAIN, it'll make that one win last year seem like a fluke. This game is much more important for the psyche of the Colts than the Patriots. Which is why they'll likely choke, and are getting points.

Remember, Vegas isn't stupid. If the Patriots were getting points at home, everybody would take them. I mean, when was the last time the Pats got points at home? I'm thinking it had to be pre-Brady."

So I pretty much think Manning still kinda sucks when it really matters. Does this game REALLY matter? No. But in his mind, it probably does. Because he's still the #2 QB in the league in the mind of most people. Oh, and for an added wrinkle, let's throw in a missed Vinatieri kick with a chance to go to OT as the clock expires. Patriots 23, Colts 20.

I have to admit, I'm excited to see this game as well. I might have to TiVo it... OK, so here's the deal: The Colts have been their consistant dominant selves this season. They tend to also be a second half team. Look at the stats: they've had pedestrian first halves and then twisted sick second halves that blow away their opponents. That's not going to happen agains the Pats.

The Pats meanwhile have come into their own and are peaking. Their performance last week was one of the most dominating performances I've ever seen a team put on in some one else's back yard. Not only am I rooting for the Patriots to beat Indy (and injure Peytie Pie... something minor to keep him out a week and break his streak) but I'm picking them as well: Pats 24 Colts 20

Raiders +7.5 over SEAHAWKS
Forget the reverse jinx stuff. I'm actually worried about this game. No Hasselbeck. No Alexander. The defense looks as bad as it has in like 3 years. The Raiders defense is actually better than people might think, at least statistically. And the Raiders have Randy Moss, who should be good for 1-3 catches of 40+ yards against this horrible secondary. Awful. Not to mention the whole "Old AFC West Rivalry" thing they'll be playing up the whole game. And I'm sure we'll see the clip of Bo Jackson running over Bosworth during a Monday night game like 15 years ago. I just hope this time it's not LaMont Jordan running over Tatupu. But really, I am worried about this game and this team. I'm not trying to work the reverse jinx here. If I were, I'd admit it. Seahawks 27, Raiders 26.

Are they still showing that clip? Christ. Why the hell don't they show clips of Jim Zorn for that matter. OK, I admit that the Seahawks are reeling from their injuries, but have you seen your 2006 Oakland Raiders? I still can't believe they've won two. They beat the Cardinals dispite 5 turnovers and beat the Steelers dispite a total offensive (and I do mean offensive) outburst of 98 yards. Their luck can't last forever... Seahawks 27 Raiders 10

Racisim through the eyes of a child

"I'm not saying the whole city is racist -- that's not what I'm saying. But we do get stereotyped here. Like, when (city council members) were watching the video of my club. They looked at the way people were dressed and said, 'How do you get that element in your club?' Well, what do you mean by 'element?' Just because they're black? Is that the 'element' you're talking about?"

Nick Barnett, June 2006

During the offseason in Green Bay, Nick Barnett ran into a little trouble with the Green Bay City Council that reeked of racisim.

Nick Barnett owns a nightclub in Green Bay called the Club FiveSix UltraLounge and last spring the Green Bay City Council decided to revoke the clubs liquor license. The reason given? The high number of complaints and police calls to the club. The only problem with this reasoning was the fact that there were several neighboring clubs that had higher numbers of incidents and police calls that were happily granted their liquor licenses. In fact, the only differentiating factor seemed to be that those clubs were white-owned businesses, where as Barnett is half African-American.

To compound the issue, while Barnett was fighting it out with the Green Bay City Council, he was issued a wrtten warning by a white police officer for jay walking. Barnett's two white companions who were walking with him were not warned. Barnett, ever the gentleman, played it off as no big deal, but now that the story had made it to the local press, the Mayor of Green Bay stepped up. He asked the City Council to reconsider the liquor license and they relented. Alls well that ends well.

As a white guy, I sometimes hear these stories and think to myself "Everybody is too sensitive theses days". I mean, is this really racisim? Is it classisim? Is it anything?

Friday afternoon my wife was standing at the Packer gate waiting for Packers to sign her autograph ball. A little boy, all of 8 years old stood beside her along with his mom. He told my wife that he couldn't stay because he was playing in his pee-wee football championship that afternoon. The child couldn't hide his excitement, his life was all about football. My wife said to him "You should tell the players when they stop. Tell them that tonight's your championship game". "I'll only tell the white players" the child repliled without a hint of hesitation. The boys mother looked at her son, surprised by his candor, and asked "Why would you say that?" "Just because" the boy said, again without hesitation. My wife crouched down and looked the 8 year old in his eyes. "Son", she said, "If you want to make it as a football player then you can't be a racist".

It's warming to the heart to know that if his football career doesn't work out he can always work for Aushwabenon Police department, or the Green Bay City Council. Racism is alive and well in America.

Week 8 Picks (Part Uno) (et duo param)

St. Ides has the best week of his career last week, with an astonishing 11-2 record! Probably not gonna do better than that again. Of course, he somehow still managed to go 3-2 in his actual money pool that counted doh! (For those wondering "How the hell did you do that?", I took the Cardinals as one of the picks, and switched from the Falcons to Steelers at the last minute. So yeah, I can't even turn my best week picking ever into actual cash.)

Heard a few interesting things on the radio this week, all about QBs, so I thought I'd throw them in here.

Boomer Esiason was on with Mike and Mike in the morning. He said that Brady and Manning are like this generation's Montana and Marino. I like that comparison. Manning/Marino put up HUGE numbers, but never won the big game. Brady/Montana put up impressive numbers, though not quite as big, but have the all-important Super Bowl rings. I liked that comparison. And it seems Marino took the comparison as an insult or something. Dan, baby, I love ya and all, but if you're going to be an announcer, you need to get over your sensitivity over the "not winning the Super Bowl" stuff. You're one of the all-time greats. It's not your fault you never had a running game. Relax.

Of course, within seconds, Esiason floored me with the comment that Drew Bledsoe is a borderline Hall of Famer. Sorry, but couldn't disagree more. I know he had some nice years with the Pats, but no way they win that first Super Bowl with Bledsoe in there. No way.

And lastly, the reason Bledsoe came up was because they were discussing his benching in favor of Tony Romo. So trivia time! Tony Romo becomes one of four undrafted QBs who will start this week. Who are the other three? (Answer somewhere in the picks below. I got 2 of the 3, the 3rd one is a little less obvious cause he's not their regular starter.)

I'm going to have to send Anonymous a case of beer or something to buy him off. Easy on 'Ol Claus, the family traveled to Green Bay where it's really really cold and between me and Mrs. Claus we'd gotten about three hours sleep over the last 36. (btw, the actual count was Samichlaus 3, Mrs. Claus 0. She actually getting more fired up over these trips than I am, and I'm pretty fired up)

Lots to write about and more blogs to come so lets stay on topic: I'm going to have to check the stats but I do believe this is the first week St. Ides has taken the lead in the history of our picks. Either way, I must acknowledge the week he had.

Dude, it was monster. WTG.

Now, let's get the universe righted again with ol Samichlaus on top of the pickin' pile...

BTW, did Boomer mention anything about who he thought the best young quarterback in the league might be?

Last Week:
St. Ides: 11-2
Samichlaus: 4-9

Overall:
St. Ides: 37-33
Samichlaus: 35-35

Bucs +9.5 over GIANTS
Uh oh, look out! After the thrashing of the Cowboys in Dallas, the Giants are now being annointed one of the NFC's best teams. The Mad Dog was just saying yesterday that he wouldn't be surprised at all to see the Giants against the Bears in the NFC title game. Slow down there, chief. We're not even half way through the season. And I think the Giants are ready to stink it up. They might pull out the game, but they won't cover against a Tampa Bay team that is suddenly showing some signs of life. Giants 23, Bucs 17.

The Bucs have shown a lot lately, and I'm wondering why... oh, there it is: Chris Simms is out. Yep, St. Ides has it right, G-Men win a closer game than they expect: Giants 26 Bucs 24

EAGLES -6.5 over Jaguars
Both teams have had a rough couple weeks. The Jaguars lost to the frickin Texans last week, badly, and now they're making excuses saying that Leftwich is not healthy. Meanwhile the Eagles lost two winnable road games at New Orleans and Tampa Bay. I think they're ready to settle in at home and go on a bit of a run. Eagles 27, Jaguars 17.

The smell of cheesesteaks will do a lot for the Eagles this week, while the Jags will continue to reel. Leftwich is listed as questionable while the Eagles remail relatively healty. I like the Eagles in a low scoring game: Eagles 23 Jags 10

Niners +16.5 over BEARS
That's a whole lotta points. Last we saw the Bears, they were barely escaping Arizona with a win, as the Cardinals suffered one of the biggest collapses in NFL history. They had their bye, and they're home again, but suddenly they're not invulnerable. Rex Grossman looked awful. Now, I don't think the Niners have a chance in hell of actually winning this game, but I think they can keep it within two touchdowns. I think. Bears 23, Niners 10.

Da Bears are due for a letdown of sorts but I can't help but wonder: why is the spread soooooo friggin huge? I'm going against my better judgement here but I'm thinking the oddsmakers know something I don't. Weather in Chi-town is going to be sunny and 56. Bears and the points: Chicago 37 San Fran 10

BENGALS -4.5 over Falcons
Tough game to call. Both teams had pretty impressive wins at home last week, the Falcons over the Steelers and the Bengals over the Panthers. I'll say the Panthers win is slightly more impressive, and the Bengals need this more as a home game for them. Bengals 27, Falcons 20.

Ron Mexico, err, Mike Vick played pretty good last week and showed he can occasionally beat you with his arm. I'm starting to like the Falcons at home but they haven't shown anything on the road. Bengals 34 Falcons 17

SAINTS -2.5 over Ravens
I'm riding this Saints bandwagon as long as I can! Ravens should have McNair back, but I'm not convinced he's a better option than Boller at this point. And their defense is getting old. Gimme the Saints! Saints 24, Ravens 13.

...and I am refusing to get on that bandwagon, fool that I am. I think a healthy Steve McNair is the difference maker in this game, all other things being equal... unless of course Reggie Bush finally has that breakout everyone's been waiting on. Ravens 24 Saints 16

PACKERS -3.5 over Cardinals
The Samichalus family will be in Green Bay for this one, and they couldn't have picked a better team to watch the Packers slaughter! Between blowing that lead to the Bears and losing to the hapless Raiders, Arizona is a mess and Denny Green is on borrowed time. Edge James took the big bucks to go to the Cardinals, and now he has to suffer the consequences. (Oh, and he's complaing about not getting the ball enough, despite having the most touches in the league of any RB.) Packers 30, Cardinals 17.

Denny Green knows how to coach against the Pack, but it's not going to be enough. Arizona's O-line is awful, and the Pack should exploit that. My only concern was a quote from Nick Barnett this moning (and let me remind certain readers that although these picks are getting here a bit late you are getting exclusive insider information at great cost to the Samichlaus family). When asked if the Packers planned to throw stunts and blitzes at the inexperienced Cardinal line to try to confuse them, Barnett replied "Boy, I sure hope so. I would like to. We'll see." Uh oh. Please dear God tell me we are not "coaching not to lose". Anyway, trainer Pepper Burris stopped by to tell Mrs. Claus and I that Greg Jennings "was close" to playing, but he hoped the coaches would sit him. Nickleback Patrick Dendy told us he was feeling good and was ready to step in for Charles Woodson if necessary, and rookie receiver Shaun "Bodie" Bodiford was thrilled to be here (picked off of the Lions practice squad) and already practicing with the first string special teams unit. Oh, and Kabeer Baja Biamila told me he loved me in a spiritual way. Thank the good Christ for that, the man looked like he could snap my dick clean off between his butt cheeks. Packer win one for the Samichlaus family: Green Bay 35 Arizona 10

Texans +2.5 over TITANS
Both these teams have had surprising wins lately, with the Titans beating the Skins in DC, and the Texans pulling a pretty big upset against the Jaguars. Mario Williams is starting to find his groove (2 sacks and a fumble recovery last week) and the Texans offense doesn't look half bad. On the other side of the ball, Vince Young has been pretty good so far. For two crappy teams, this might actually be a decent game. Texans 27, Titans 26.

This will be a decent game but I'm going to go with the Titans. It's another case of I'm not convinced that the dog can do it on the road. Titans win and cover: Titans 24 Texans 20

CHIEFS -5.5 over Seahawks
What can I say other than thank god the Hasselbeck injury isn't season-ending, and our defense has been horrible. Starting safety Michael Boulware has been benched after being directly responsible for 4 touchdowns in the past 2 weeks: That 95-yard TD run by Chester Taylor (what the hell is he doing up so close to the line?), a 40-yard bomb TD by the Vikings on 3rd and 17 (don't bite on the pump fake FFS), a halfback pass for a TD on 3rd and 15 (let the D-line and LBs worry about the run, please), and that ridiculous catch by Torry Holt (he was actually in good position, but knock the ball away, don't try and catch it). Anyways, with Seneca Wallace and Mo Morris in the backfield for Seattle, they have about zero chance of winning in KC this week. And if Seattle couldn't stop Chester frickin Taylor, what's Larry Johnson going to do to them? It could get ugly. Chiefs 30, Seahawks 16.

I watched a good part of the Seattle game last week and had to admit: they looked pretty bad. Hasslebeck is a huge loss, and Boulware has no excuse for his play. I saw several missed tackles and at least one play where Ken Hamlin deliberately avoided tackling someone. At least I think it was 26. Maybe it was 28, but I did say outloud to no one in particular "26 is a pussy". I'll take the Cheifs at home and big: Cheifs 34 Seahawks 20

Rams +8.5 over CHARGERS
Chargers got off to a bad start in KC, then came back, then lost it on a last second field goal. This team is talented, but I'm starting to believe the critics who claim Marty Schottenheimer (and yes, I probably spelled that wrong) can get too conservative and lose games that way. After their bye, Rams find themselves tied for the NFC West lead after Seattle played like doodoo last week. The Chargers secondary is banged up, but at least Merriman will be playing this week as he awaits the appeal on his suspesion. Chargers 33, Rams 30.

Nope, you got it right. Schottenheimer. Funny story from yesterday: me and Mrs. Claus were at the players gate waiting for Packers along with another group of Virginians we met up with. One of the guys had a "Rainman-esque" ability to identify every Packer player, coach and trainer by sight (he correctly identified every person coming out of the parking lot including strenght and conditioning coach Rock Gilliam). I told him "If you spot Kurt Schottenheimer, let my wife know. I want everybody's signature but his". When a player wants to "ignore" the autograph seekers he will often pretend he's on his cell phone as he drives by the gate. I told Mrs. Claus "If Kurt Schottenheimer stops to sign the ball, just pretend you're on your cell phone". Anyway, I don't know what to make of this game, so I'll take the Bolts: Bolts 31 Rams 20.

BRONCOS -2.5 over Colts
We'll see just how good that Broncos defense is. And how this year's Colts offense matches up against solid competition. I think these two teams are fairly evenly matched, and the Colts run defense will be hurting without Corey Simon. Watch the Broncos run wild, and pull it out at home. Broncos 20, Colts 17.

Could this be the week the Colts lose their first? Last week they had a pedestrian first half against the Skins and a terrific second half. It's tough to pick against the Broncos at home but I'm going to anyway: Indy 31 Denver 27

BROWNS -2.5 over Jets
I keep expecting the Jets to have a bad game, and they keep proving me wrong. Not this week! Charlie Frye! Kellen Winslow! Braylon Edwards! The Cleveland Browns potent offense goes off! (For a whopping 27 points.) Browns 27, Jets 20.

Correctamundo. The Jets are playing over their heads and that's all about good coaching. I think St. Ides might have been right about Herm Edwards all along. The Jets come crashing to earth: Browns 24 Jets 21

Steelers -9.5 over RAIDERS
After the Raiders thumped the Cardinals last week, I'm tempted to take them and the home points. Then I remember how bad they are and how awful their coach is, and I just can't do it. Steelers 28, Raiders 17.

Big Dumb Ben is questionable with a brain injury, and that's sort of funny because I didn't realize the kid had a brain in the first place. If he can't go then it's Charlie Batch, and you know what? I think that's enough to keep the game close. Steelers 31 Raiders 24

PANTHERS -5.5 over Cowboys
Tony Romo, meet Julius Peppers. The Dallas offensive line was as much to blame for Bledsoe's benching as he was. Okay, maybe not. Maybe it was that pick he threw in the end zone. But guess what, Romo did the same thing later in the game, and his mistake went the other way fora 90+ yard score. Speaking of Romo, time for the trivia answer. The other three undrafted QBs starting this week: Jake Delhomme, Jon Kitna, and Damon Huard. Panthers 24, Cowboys 16.

Kitna wasn't drafted? No shit! Anyway, I don't think this game is going to be close. The 'boys are in a state of disarray and a road game against a good D is the last thing Tony Romo needs to get right. Parcells will offer a simple game plan and the Cats will be all over it. Panthers 27 Cowboys 10

Patriots -2.5 over VIKINGS
What does it tell you that the Vikings thumped the Seahawks in Seattle, yet are still getting points at home this week? That the AFC is still much better than the NFC. I think. Who knows. I just know I'm frickin sick of hearing about how great Steve Hutchinson is (okay, he's good, but not $49 million good), and how he's the reason the Seahawks are struggling (he's not, and 4-2 isn't exactly 1-5), and how he sprung Chester Taylor's 95-yard TD run (he didn't, and that was more the safeties fault than any big block). Please, for the love of god, someone roll up his knee, hell, both knees, and put me out of my misery by crippling him. Oh, and by the way, the Seattle defense gave two Vikings receivers concussions and another an injured back. So they're down to like their 4th and 5th string receivers. No way this offense does anything against a defense whose players actually stick to their assignments. Patriots 24, Vikings 10.

I wish I'd saved my emails from St. Ides about Steve Hutchinson from the last two seasons. He was St. Ides's wet dream: a Michigan Wolvereen playing for the Seahawks. St. Ides extolled his virtues in a series of love stories, err, emails that would have made Harlequin squirt their corporate shorts. Anyway, I agree with his analysis: New England will have no trouble with this Viqueens team, even in the Metrodome. Patsies 23 Viqueens 7

Week 7 Picks (Part One) (and Part Two)

We're still waiting for that one "Wow, they were right on!" week to happen for one of us... Maybe this will be the week. Those huge spreads make it rough. Last week Dallas covered 12.5 (over Houston) and San Diego covererd 10.5 (over San Fran). But the Skins didn't cover 9.5 (lost the game outright to Tennessee), Denver couldn't cover 14.5 (at home against god awful Oakland), and the Bears SHOULD have lost in Arizona, giving 10.5. Ah well, that's why it's called gambling, right?

Anonymous is right, this is a weird, hard to predict season. The thing I like about parity is that it forces teams to out smart rather than out spend the opposition in order to succeed. Unfortunately that's also what's killing Green Bay. It was nice when Ron Wolf was the GM, but 6 years of Mike Sherman and Ted Thompson have all but killed the franchise. We didn't even stop at mediocre on the way to God awful. Anyway, as St. Ides slowly closes the gap, on to the picks...

Last Week:
St. Ides: 8-5
Samichlaus: 7-6

Overall:
Samichlaus: 31-26
St. Ides: 26-31

BUCCANEERS over Eagles -4.5
Samichlaus said I must have gone "off the deep end" for picking the Bucs at home last week against the Bengals. Now I gave the Bengals the win, but took the points. But guess what. They won the whole game! Meanwhile the Eagles lost to the surprise Saints. So are the Eagles for real? How about this rookie Bucs QB who might take over Simms Jr's job permanently? I have no idea. When in doubt, home team and points. Eagles 24, Bucs 20.

I'm still not over the shock of that Bengals game. Kudos to St. Ides for seeing what I seeing what I could not see. So guess what? I'm going the other way. I'll take the Eagles and the points. Eagles 27 Bucs 20

FALCONS +1.5 over Steelers
I took the Falcons at home last week against the Giants as one of my "pool" picks last week. Needless to say, they burnt me. (Side note: Not sure if I've mentioned this yet, but I'm in an actual money pool. You pick 5 games every week. Any 5 games you want. To win the weekly prize, so far you need to get all 5 games right, and then win the Monday night tie-breaker points. Typically 3-5 people get all 5 right (out of 70ish people in the pool). The weekly prize is $250. There's also an overall yearly prize of about $5000. After 6 weeks, I haven't done better than 4-1 (and that only once), and stand at a horrible 13-17. My dad is tied for first at 22-8. So yeah, I suck. Back to the picks...) Big Ben loooked rejuvenated. The Falcons looked awful. Which means it's time to throw that upside down this week. Or something like that. Falcons 20, Steelers 17.

I hate to do this to my wife, but I read last week that the Steeler fans (in the tradition of Jerome "The Bus" Bettis) have given Najeh Davenport a new nickname: "The Dump Truck". Gol, that's just unfortunate. The Falcons are a mess and the Steelers are just getting better: Steelers 31 M.V.S.D. 17

Panthers +3.5 over BENGALS
Suddenly Carson Palmer and the Bengals aren't looking so hot. Their defense is pretty bad. (And it was pretty bad last year too, they just happened to get a TON of turnovers, which is about 50% luck.) And Chad Johnson has been eerily quiet. Meanwhile the Panthers started 0-2 (without Steve Smith) and are 4-0 since (with Steve Smith). The Bengals need this game more than the Panthers, so I'm going with that, but they're not good enough to cover. Bengals 29, Panthers 27.

Palmer's had two mediocre games in a row and this is a tough defense to get right against. Tight contest, but I'll gamble that Palmer isn't going to be mediocre three weeks in a row. Bengals 27 Panthers 21

Patriots -5.5 over BILLS
After a promising start, the Bills have settled back in right around where they should be - the botom third of the league. Patriots probably have a little extra incentive to prove that the close game between these two in Foxboro in Week 1 was a fluke. Although with every passing week, Tom Brady probably misses Deion Branch a bit more. (Did I mention he had 2 HUGE touchdowns last week for Seattle?) Patriots 23, Bills 16.

I like the Pats too, big time. It's the SBS "Kiss of death" for Anonymous: Pats 27 Bills 10

Lions +3.5 over JETS
The Jets keep winning. And they keep playing crappy teams it seems. Although the Dolphins came pretty close to sending the game to OT last week. Whatever, I can't get too excited analyzing this game. Jets are due to lose to a bad team. Lions 30, Jets 20.

I like the Jets at home against a crappy NFC team that even the Packers whooped. They're good enough to handle the Matt Millon all stars with ease. Jets 34 Lions 20

Packers +4.5 over DOLPHINS
Oh, check this out. Last week, there were 6 teams that had a bye. This week, again, there are 6 teams that have a bye. Why do I mention this? Because the NFL, in their money-grubbing wisdom, decided to increase the number of bye teams from 4 to 6 for two weeks this season, so the byes end a week earlier. All for TV ratings and more money. Why do I mention this now? Cause it's wreaking absolute havok on my fantasy team. The following "starters" for me all have byes this week: Marc Bulger, Steven Jackson, Reggie Bush, Antonio Bryant, Bernard Berrian, and John Carney. I'm going to have to drop one of those just because I can't fit them all on the bench. Ugh. Anyways, I am reminded of this because I am starting Brett Favre this week, and hope he doesn't throw too many picks. Which he shouldn't. This Dolphins D isn't as good as years past, and their offense pretty much sucks. If the Packers hope to salvage this season and give their fans any hope at all, they need to win this game. Packers 30, Dolphins 23.

I'm not sure who Favre is going to be throwing to this week. Robinson is gone, Ferguson is out for the season, Green is coming back from an injury. That leaves Driver and Jennings, and Driver hasn't had a good game in 4 weeks. Meanwhile, my Father in Law who is a die hard Dolphins fan is coming over the house to watch the game and he usually carries a weapon. You gotta love the south. PS: if the Packers get behind, Favre will throw picks. He's a lot more diciplined this season but he's still a gunslinger at heart. I'll take the Packers and the Points: Dolphins 24 Packers 23.

TEXANS +9.5 over Jaguars
I took Houston last week getting a ton of points at home, and regretted it. Let's see if I can make it two weeks in a row. Jaguars 24, Texans 16.

I don't know... another who cares game. I'll take the Jags D over that overrated pretty boy. Jags 24 Texans 10

CHIEFS +5.5 over Chargers
Conventional wisdom says home field advantage is worth like 3 points. In KC, one of the toughest places to play, I'd say it's closer to 6 points. So are you telling me the Chargers are like 11 points better than the Chiefs on a neutral field? I'm not quite buying it. Phillip Rivers is due for a bad game on the road. Chiefs 24, Chargers 23.

I agree. Rivers ain't never heard anything like the noise at Arrowhead and it's going to throw him off. If the Cheifs don't win outright, they'll keep it close. Cheifs 31 Bolts 27

Broncos -4.5 over BROWNS
There are 13 games this week (including no Sunday night game due to the frickin World Series). 7 home dogs. They can't all cover. No way. Broncos didn't blow away the Raiders in Denver. They should bounce back. Though I do think the Browns are better than people think. Broncos 27, Browns 20.

I'm going to take the Browns at home simply because Denver (all together now) sucks on the road. The Browns will win outright: Browns 24 Denver 23

COLTS -9.5 over Redskins
Redskins just lost to the frickin Titans in DC. They look awful. Colts haven't exactly been blowing people away, and their run D is horrible with Corey Simon done for the year. I'm very tempted to take the Skins, but yeah, the Colts are due to blow a team away. And might as well be the Skins. (I've said "they're due to whatever" way too much in this week's picks. Oh well, I'm due to be right about a few things.) Colts 30, Skins 16.

LOL! I'm due to agree with you on one of these picks but not this one. I'll take Washington and the points: Colts 34 Skins 30

Cardinals -3.5 over RAIDERS
Raiders showed some life in Denver. Cardinals absolutely collapses in that loss to the Bears. The only thing interesting about this game is which coach will be fired first, Denny Green or Art Shell? Matt Leinart looked pretty damn good though. I wonder if the Raiders regret passing on him now... He might have something to proove. Cardinals 27, Raiders 20.

Denny Green sounded like he was going to have a nervous breakdown after the Bears game. Actually, it was kind of funny. He reminded me of Howard Dean. Anyway, the Raiders are pretty awful and so are the Cardinals, but Mat Leinert is pretty mature for a young QB, and that's all I need. It's the Samichlaus stinker of the season: Cardinals 31 Raiders 20

Vikings +6.5 over SEAHAWKS
Samichlaus says give it up with the reverse jinx. But this year, my reverse jinx picks are 2-2 and Seattle is 3-1, so I'll stick with it for now. For those of you who missed the end of last week's game, here's a quick recap: Seattle up 6 (after coming back from a 21-7 halftime score by the way), Rams have the ball deep in their territory with about 5 minutes left. And seem poised to drive. But UH OH! There's Lofa Tatupu picking off a pass intended for Torry Holt and taking it to the Rams 20! Seattle grinds the ball inside the 10. Rams burn 2 timeouts. Just before the 2-minute warning, 3rd and 1. Mo Morris runs left, picks up the first down, and as he's going down, he falls forward into the legs of a defender. The ball pops hits the defender's knee, pops loose, Rams recover. The announcers (obviously Rams fans) gush on and on about how Leonard Little made the big play of stripping the ball, even as the replay shows Little was wrapped around Morris' legs, his arms not near the ball, and it was the knee that knocked the ball loose. Holmgren challenges the call (and it wasn't even close). The play stands. Seattle loses it's last timeout. If they just take a knee there, they kick a figgy and go up by 9. Game over. So instead, Bulger throws a bomb, safety Michael Boulware goes for the pick rather than bat it away, Torry Holt makes a ridiculous juggling catch and jobs into the end zone. Rams up by 1, about 1:40 left. No timeouts for Seattle. Yet somehow, some way, Matt Hasselbeck carves apart the Rams defense. 19 yards here, 12 here, 15 here. Next thing you know, they're inside the Rams 35, and spike the ball with like 20 seconds left. So, in a call that could have been questioned had the turnout been different, they call another play. Rush Mack Strong right for a couple more yards. But tick tick tick tick tick! Clock is ticking! Seattle lines up! Snaps the ball, Hasselbeck spikes it. Rams rookie coach Scott Linehan is jumping up and down, and runs over to a lineman hollering for a flag. And gets it! (Why does the NFL even pay the refs if they let the coaches make the calls?) "Game over! Game over!" the Rams coach hollers as he jumps up and down like a moron. The referee calmly turns on his microphone and explains, "It is NOT game over. The penalty is for an illegal formation, not a false start. There is no 10-second clock run-off for that penalty. The illegal formation penalty allows the play to continue, so the play did happen. The ball was spiked and the clock was stopped. Now, after the play, the 5-yard penalty will be enforced." So the kick goes from a 49 yarder to a 54 yarder - a big difference. Anyways, Josh Brown calmly strolls onto the field and nails it (with plenty of leg to spare). What's my point: 2 things: 1) Thank GOD that referee (Ed Hochuli) knew what he was doing. I'm convinced 9 out of 10 refs would have blown that call, and given the Rams coach the 10-second run-off he was begging for. 2) The Seahawks 2 years ago lose that game. The Seahawks last year win that game. So I'm happy to see they're more like last year's team.

Now, with that long-ass paragraph said, it's time for the Hutch Bowl! No way Seattle loses this game. And expect Hutch to be embarassed at least twice. He's trying to downplay it in the media (refusing to talk to Seattle media by claiming "This game isn't about me, there's 50 other players on my team"). But you're crazy if you don't think Holmgren wants this game badly. In Seattle, with a sputtering offense, the Vikings don't have much of a chance. Seahawks 30, Vikings 24.

Shit, I had to get up and pee twice during that read. Uhh, I don't know what else I can add except to say that I think Seattle will cover. Seattle 34 Viqueens 23

Giants +3.5 over COWBOYS
Giants showed me something in Atlanta last week. Their rushing game and pass rush both came to life. And if anybody is vulnerable to a good pass rush, it's Drew Bledsoe. Over/under on how many times he's sacked is 5.5. And I'll take the over. Giants 20, Cowboys 17.

Both teams will be ready. Both coaches know each other very well. Both teams are evenly matched. But only one team has T.O. and that's the difference. Cowboys 24 Giants 20

Week 6 Picks (Part 1) (and part 2!)

Guess what! We missed Week 5! Oops!

Anyways, besides the Yankees sucking and th Mets winning, and hockey season starting, I'm sure there's lots to talk about. But it's football time now! (PS. If the Mets lose, how bad do you think the ratings will be for a Tigers-Cardinals World Series? Could set the record for worst ratings ever I think.)

Sooooorrrrry kids! See my comment below and my picks too.

Last Week (Well, actually, 2 weeks ago):
St. Ides: 8-6
Samichlaus: 7-7

Overall:
Samichlaus: 24-20
St. Ides: 18-26

Texans +12.5 over COWBOYS
Between the whole TO soap opera (apparently after last week's loss in Philly, he strormed into the locker room shouting "Why the fvck did you guys bring me here?" Meanwhile, the truth is he was thrown to 11 times, or about 30% of the pass attempts. Sadly, Drew Bledsoe sucks, so not all of them made it there. Anyways, the Tony Romo watch is on. #1 pick Mario Williams finally got a sack, and maybe the immobile Bledsoe could give him another. Not sure how the Texans offense is gonna look against this good Dallas D, but that's lot of points for a team in disarray to be giving. Cowboys 24, Texans 13.

I like the Texans too. I see pretty boy tossing a TD in garbage time to keep it close: Cowboys 27 Texans 23

FALCONS -2.5 over Giants
Coming off the bye, Abraham should be healthy again for the Falcons. Which means Eli will get a steady diet of pressure. Write it down now: the Giants will be one of the most inconsistent teams all season. Their defense has looked like crap mostly, though they shut down the Skins last weekend. I think these teams are about even talent-wise, and since the Falcons are home and giving less than the standard 3-point home field advantage, I'll take em to win by 3. Falcons 26, Giants 23.

Good analysis, but sadly flawed. The Giants are a better team than the Falcons... but I like the point about their inconsistancy. Atlanta still has Ed Donatel as their defensive coorcinator, right? I'll be contrarian: Giants 31 Mike Vick and his sick dick 20

SAINTS +3.5 over Eagles
Do we really know what we have in the Saints yet? No? Neither does Vegas. Reggie Bush made his first (of many?) game changing plays last week with the winning punt return for a TD. However, the game really shouldn't have been that close against a struggling Bucs team with a rookie QB. Still, it was a divisional game, so those are usually close. Meanwhile, the Eagles offense is pretty much all McNabb at this point (Westbrook and Stallworth are banged up pretty badly.) How long can he keep it up? Not long enough. Saints 24, Eagles 20.

The Eagles did not impress me against the Packers, who suck and yet outplayed them for the first half. However I like them in this game: Eagles 27 Saints 17

Titans +9.5 over REDSKINS
I keep taking the Titans plus the points, and they keep covering. Vince Young looked fairly comfortable in there last week. Of course, the Colts defense is awful right now, but still, it had to build his confidence a bit. And the Titans hung in there against the Colts. Despite the Redskins offense coming to life 2 weeks ago against the Jaguars, they looked lost again last week against the Giants. Skins should win this, but I'll take the points. Redskins 27, Titans 19.

Agreed. And I think Vince Younng is going to get better and better. Skins 24 Titans 20

LIONS -0.5 over Bills
Lions had a chance against the Rams 2 weeks ago in the Mike Martz' Revenge game. They should have won last week against the Vikings. (2 defensive TDs on Jon Kitna turnovers blew a 4th-quarter 17 point lead.) So they're due, right? Yeah, I think so. Losman is due for a bad game, and the Lions defense is actually decent. It's their offense that stinks. Lions 16, Bills 13.

The Lions are a lot like the Packers. If you root for them you'll see that they're close but not quite there. I wonder if all that weather in Buffalo affected the Bills practice? The Lions have to beat somebody, right? Lions 24 Bills 21

BUCANNEERS +5.5 over Bengals
Bengals are coming off a bye after a thumping by the Pats brought them down to earth a bit. They should be able to win this game, and we don't really know yet how good (or bad) that rookie Bucs QB is (whose name I'm too lazy to look up right now). I'll take the home points, but just barely. I'm regretting this pick even as I type this. Bengals 31, Bucs 27.

You've really gone off the deep end, haven't you? Wow. Bengals 37 Bucs 17

Panthers +2.5 over RAVENS
I think the Ravens were exposed a bit Monday Night against the Broncos. Steve McNair and Ray Lewis both looked their age. Jamal Lewis hasn't been the same since he spent some time in the slammer. Yes, the Ravens defense is still pretty good. But any early thoughts that Steve McNair could single-handedly turn around their yearly horrible offense are in doubt. Panthers 19, Ravens 16.

McNair, like Favre, will show wear and tear as the season goes on. It is the sad truth of the aging quarterback. Panthers 27 Ravens 10

RAMS +3.5 over Seahawks
Rams should have lost to the Packers last week. (Or at the very least, gone to OT). They almost lost to the Lions (in St. Louis) two weeks ago. They lost to the Niners. On paper, this should be an easy one to pick. But the Seahawks thrashing in Chicago is still on everyone's mind, and suddenly Seattle is one loss away from being 1.5 games out of first place in the anemic NFC West. Not to mention the Rams always play Seattle tough, especially on their home turf. Jeramy Stevens is back, which will help. But if Rex Grossman and Bernard Berrian can slice apart our secondary, imagine what Marc Bulger and Torry Holt will do. This game comes down to whoever has the ball last. Rams 34, Seahawks 33.

Dude, will you stop with the reverse jinx stuff? That Chicago game is exactly what the Seahawks needed. They'll be ready. Seahawks 31 Rams 17

JETS -2.5 over Dolphins
J-E-T-S Jets! Jets! Jets! Who woulda thunk the Jets would actually be a favorite over anybody in Week 6? Not me. But something is telling me no way in hell should I take Joey Harrington, who replaced an injured (read "benched") Daunte Culpepper last week. God, this game stinks. Jets 23, Dolphins 20.

The Jets always play the Fins tough. Jets games are my father in law's worst nightmare. I think he still wakes up with visions of pedestrian quarterbacks like Richard Todd and Ken O'Brien lighting it up against superior Dolphin Teams. Jets 23 Dolphins 20

Chiefs +6.5 over STEELERS
Not sure if I actually wrote this before, but the Steelers are suffering the "Super Bowl Loser" jinx. "But they WON the Super Bowl!", you say? Maybe on the scoreboard, but people who watched the game know better. And so do the Football Gods. The only thing that could possibly make a complete Steelers collapse any sweeter would be Jerome "Overexposed" Bettis being struck dead by a bolt of lightning. I paid the price for calling Big Ben "Dilferesque", but maybe I was right after all. Chiefs 27, Steelers 20.

Oh lord. You don't really want to see Jerome Bettis dead now, do you??? Last week Najeh Davenport had one catch for 30+ yards. When will Bill Cowher realize he's sitting on a gold mine? Steelers 31 Cheifs 24

Chargers +10.5 over NINERS
Lots of points to give. I'm kinda wishy washy on this pick. But I'll say I like the offense vs defense matchups on both sides of the ball heavily in favor of the Chargers. Chargers 31, Niners 17.

That's too much gravy for my pot roast. Niners and the points: Bolts 27 Niners 24

BRONCOS -14.5 over Raiders
You know the Raiders are bad if they're getting over 2 touchdowns in this once fierce divisional rivalry. Some guy named Andrew Walter is the Raiders QB. Randy Moss has pretty much admitted he's mailing it in. Don't expect any mercy from Denver. Broncos 29, Raiders 6.

That's too much KY for my lambskin condom. Broncos 31 Raiders 20

Bears -10.5 over CARDINALS
I'd say this is a potential "let down" game for the Bears except: A) the Cardinals have rookie QB Leinart in there, B) the Cardinals have a crap offensive line to protect said rookie, C) the Cardinals have a crap offensive line and, therefore, no running game, and D) even if Leinart DOES get time to throw, star WR Larry Fitzgerald is hurt. Which means double coverage on Anquan Boldin. The real question here is the over/under on Leinart turnovers. Let's go with 3.5, and I'll take the over. Bears 29, Cardinals 13.

I'd be surprised if the Cards put up 10. The Bears are the real deal, and that's coming from a Packer fan. Bears 34 Cardinals 9