Week two picks.

Good Saturday to all of our readers and welcome to our week 2 picks! In bringing lameness to a new level, St. Ides got these to me at 4:08 PM on Friday but I didn't get them until much later because I was... bowling. In fact, Ol' Samichlaus is so lame that he called Mrs. Samichlaus after rolling a 224 to share his joy. Anyway, for those who do not remember the drill, St. Ides's Picks are in Seahawk blue and Samichlaus's picks are in Packer green. Home team is in all CAPS and St. Ides always lists his choice against the spread first ... so on to the picks!

A little late in the day, but better late than never, right? :P

BUCS +3.5 over Saints

Home underdogs baby. The Bucs actually didn't look that bad against Seattle last week. Jeff "Light In The Loafers" Garcia actually gives them their best QB in years. Their defense is still pretty good. And I think the Saints are overrated this year. Mostly because of their "ride the emotions" and "feel good story" success last year. Their defense isn't great, their receivers are very thin after Colston, and they still haven't really figured out the best way to maximize their MacAllister/Bush backfield. Saints 20, Bucs 17.

I hate going against the home dog, that is a huge betting no-no but the talent differential is huge with theses teams. The Saints are looking to rebound after the beat-down the Colts put on them and they come up huge this week
Saints 34 Bucs 10


Packers +0.5 over GIANTS

The spread is so low because they're not sure if Eli is going to play or not. I think he will. Either way, the Giants secondary is pretty horrendous, and their starting RB is out. So the Packers defense should be able to hold up against a no-name RB and an injured QB. Packers 20, Giants 17.

I really thought that this was going to be a no-brainer, but I made two erroneous assumptions: I assumed both Vernand Morrency and Greg Jennings would be back, but today's JS Online reports that neither will play Sunday. That's why the spread is so low: the Packers are running with the same offense they stumbled with last week. The other thing to consider is that Sunday is my birthday. What better gift for Brett Favre to give to me than to march into my old home town and secure a win. Considering we've been to Green Bay for his last two birthdays its the least he can do. With that said, the Packers D is what really makes the difference: Packers 17 Giants 10


Bills +9.5 over STEELERS

Big Ben had an awesome game last week. I'm still not sold on him, and will continue to call him a modern day Trent Dilfer until he strings together like 5 consecutive starts where he actually wins the game for his team, and doesn't just not lose it. If that makes any sense. Steelers 16, Bills 14.

Boy, some people would rather be right than smart. Take a look at the other side of the field and remember that's Dick Jauron staring back at you. Besides, last time I checked Dilfer won a Super Bowl. Well, then again so did Hasselbeck... holding Brett Favre's clipboad in 1996. Steelers 27 Bills 13


TITANS +7.5 over Colts

The Titans always play the Colts tough. Somehow, some way, they always do. And that goes back even a few years ago when they had the likes of Billy Volen and Steve McNair at QB. I think Vince Young can do enough to keep it close. Colts 26, Titans 20.

Yep, I agree. They won't beat the Colts but they'll give them a good fight. Colts 31 Titans 24


Bengals -6.5 over BROWNS

Charlie Frye went from opening day starting QB (for the Browns)... to 3rd string QB (for the Seahawks) in a matter of days. I think they're planning on sticking Dereck Anderson back at QB this week. So we'll watch him implode, and then they'll have to start Brady Quinn next week by default. Romeo Crennel's strong point is not offense, and it's becoming more and more obvious every week. Meanwhile, the Bengals took care of business against their rival Ravens last week. They should roll. Bengals 27, Browns 13.

Again, St. Ides analysis is dead on. Who the hell is Dereck Anderson? I may live to regret this but he can't possibly have Charlie Frye's talent... and Frye couldn't do shit with the Browns. Meanwhile, the Bengals are a real good football team period. Bengals 31 Browns 10


Falcons +10.5 over JAGUARS

The Falcons have to win a few games this year, right? The Jaguars could possibly be one of the worst teams in the league this year. Their defense is getting older and lost some key parts, their QB was only named their starter a couple weeks ago (and they have no Plan B at QB after releasing Leftwich), and their receivers can't catch a cold. This game might just be the Stinker of the Week, if it's not too early to start using that title. Falcons 17, Jags 13.

The Falcons are cursed. They may not win a game this year. The Jags aren't much better, but they're not cursed... unless they decide to sign Marcus Vick or something. I see a Jaguar win, but not by 10.5 Jags 20 Falcons 13


Texans +6.5 over PANTHERS
I just have a feeling that the Panthers are in for another one of those roller coaster seasons where they beat tough teams and lose to sucky teams. I'm not saying Houston is sucky... Okay, maybe I am.. But with Mario Williams coming to life last week and that Schaub guy at QB, maybe they have a pulse. Texans 20, Panthers 17.

Houston is on the upswing. Shaub was a great acquisition (gotta wonder how the Falcons feel about letting him go. Perhaps they feel a little.... cursed???) and Mario Williams finally had a breakout game. However, I'm going the other way on this one. I think Shaub will be confused by his first look at a John Fox defense and I see the Panthers winning by a TD: Panthers 24 Texans 17.


Niners +3.5 over RAMS

All the pre-season hype was about the Niners, and how they're ready to lay claim to the NFC West title. Blah blah blah. Meanwhile, they stunk the place up against the Cardinals last week. They had something like 80(!!!) total offensive yards before their final drive. They still finished with under 200 yards total. The Rams were also supposed to challenge. But now Orlando Pace is hurt, as is Tye Hill, their starting CB #1 pick from 2 years ago. And Steven Jackson had fumbilitis last week. Bulger isn't effective when he gets consistent pressure, and he will see that in this game. Niners 23, Rams 20.

Everything St. Ides said is correct. The problem is the Rams are real good at home. Take an outdoor grass team and place them indoors in a loud stadium and strange stuff starts to happen. All the Niner hype is BS. That's a 8-8 team at very best, and I'd be surprised if they win more than 6. I'm going with the Rams at home: Rams 31 Niners 21


CARDINALS +2.5 over Seahawks

Reverse jinx baby! Leinart had an awful game last week, but he should be better this week. Boldin and Fitzgerald usually light up the Seahawks secondary. It'll be a good test to see how far the revamped secondary (3 new starters) has REALLY come. Anyways, Seattle should win this game easily, but I know better. Cardinals 26, Seahawks 23.

Aww jeez. Thanks for the gimme. What's with you Irishes and the superstitions? OK, like I should talk. Once, two of my Aunts got into a fist fight with a woman on the Second Ave. El when they accused said woman of giving them "the evil eye". My uncle Cono had to bail them out of jail. Fucking idiots. But I digress... This is a simple case of one of the top 5 teams in the NFC beating one of the bottom 5 teams in the NFC, even if "Matty" is getting coached by Archie Manning. Seahawks 27 Cardinals 17

DOLPHINS +3.5 over Cowboys

Let's everybody jump on the Tony Romo bandwagon after he lit up the Giants for 45 points, woohoo! Let's not. Overrated, he is. The Cowboys safeties (Roy Williams and former Seahawk Ken Hamlin) are probably two of the hardest hitters - and worst coverage safeties - in the league. Bombs away! Under/over on how many 40+ passes they give up this season is 20 and a half. Tony Romo, meet Jason Taylor. Dolphins 27, Cowboys 20.

I'm not sure what to make of the Dolphins. I really thought they'd beat the Redskins what with Trent Green making his first start and the Redskins essentially sucking. But Green looked ordinary and the Skins won. I'm going agree with St. Ides. I'll give the Fins the win as a special birthday gift to my father-in-law. Dolphins 24 Cowboys 15


LIONS -3.5 over Vikings
Adrian Peterson was impressive in his debut. But I'm still not convinced Tavaris Jackson is going to be able to do anything in the air to balance their offense. Mike Martz has some serious weapons to work with on offense. Let's see how they do at home, against a divisional opponent with a stingy D. Lions 20, Vikings 16.

I've been agonizing over this one for a while, wavering back and forth. Both teams have really explosive offensive capabilities, and both have suspect defenses. This game will tell a lot, but in the end I think that the Lions will prevail in a shoot out. Detroit 41 Minnesota 37


Chiefs +12.5 at BEARS

Chiefs are awful. Horrible. Throw in Herm Edwards as coach, and they'll be lucky to win 4 games. Although I don't think Rex Grossman can score more than 13 points on anyone. Did you see where the Chargers LB said his coach called Rex a "mental midget" and said all you need to do is trash talk him a little to get into his head and throw him off his game? I believe it. And you can bet opposing defense will try it. Only way the Bears cover is if they get 2 or more special teams/defensive scores. Bears 14, Chiefs 3.

Did anyone catch the HBO series "Inside Minicamp: the Kansas City Chiefs"? St. Ides has told us for years that Herm Edwards was a terrible coach and for years I defended him. So let me say it here for all to read: St. Ides was right and Ol' Samichlaus was wrong. Herm Edwards is a terrible coach. The Bears should win this easily. Bears 24 Chiefs 7


RAVENS -6.5 over Jets
The Jets and Mangini are due for some bad karma after squealing on Belichick. As something I read pointed out, I bet Belichick didn't object to the video taped spying while he worked for the Pats, did he? And who's to say that those little advantages didn't even help him land his current head coaching gig to some degree. Anyways, it's going to be a long season for the Jets. They got some breaks last year. This year, karma and luck are against them. Ravens 20, Jets 10.

Christ there's a lot of games this week. I'm typing as fast as I can and there's three more to go. OK... even with the Patriots cheating against the Jets, I still think the Jets are a second or third class team. I've studied the film of that game and really, the Jets didn't look like they belonged on the same field as the Pats. On the other hand, the Ravens are going to get better as the year progresses. Just like St. Ides, I like the Ravens by 10: Ravens 24 Jets 14


Raiders +9.5 over BRONCOS
The Raiders aren't as bad as people think. And it looks like Culpepper might get a chance to prove he's not washed up this week. Not sure if that improves or hurts their chances, but I think they keep this game somewhat close. Broncos 20, Raiders 16.

Seriously? The Raiders are awful. Now put them on the road. Now put them on the road in Denver. You still think this is a 4 point game? The Broncos romp: Denver 34 Oakland 13


PATRIOTS -3.5 over Chargers

The Chargers are talking a bit too much smack for a team that hasn't won jack. Spying or not, they won't be able to stop Brady. And you can bet they'll have a decent game plan cooked up to shut down (and shut up) Tomlinson. I think he called the Patriots big cheaters or something this week. What about Merriman and his steroids suspension? Suddenly that's not cheating?
Patriots 23, chargers 17.

So, when are you and Anonymous leaving for Vermont? If the Pats weren't at home they wouldn't be favored, but I think the Bolts pull the upset. This game has been circled on their calendar since the schedule first came out and I see a fired up Charger team catching the Patriots at the right time. I'll be curious to see how there "second half adjustments" look now that they can't cheat. Chargers 27 Patriots 24


EAGLES -6.5 over Redskins

Eagles aren't as bad as they played last week. And the Redskins aren't as good as they played last week. Things even out a bit this time around. Eagles 23, Skins 16.

Agreed. The Eagles at home make a statement here. They clean up the special teams and smack the Redskins good: Eagles 27 Redskins 13