It's time to think about the good things in life...

We’re going to try something different at SBS this week. Rather than waxing poetic about Brett Favre or analyzing to death the nuances of the latest Packer loss, I feel like writing something happy.

So without further adieu, here are some observations about one of my favorite subjects, life.

From time to time life gives us a little inspiration. Watching Teddy Bruschi playing football on Sunday, seven months removed from a mild stroke was one of those times. And although the Patriots did not blow out Buffalo, they clearly picked it up a notch for their emotional leader and won a tremendous ball game.

Life can be a teacher. Watching the shot of Brett Favre collapsed at the end of Sunday’s game, exhausted and spent, taught me that there’s one guy on the Packers with absolutely no quit, five interceptions and all… but I couldn’t help but think of a well known photograph of Y.A. Tittle kneeling at Yankee Stadium, tired and spent, and at the end of his career.

Life can remind us “be careful what you wish for”. Early in my marriage I wished that Mrs. Samichlaus would really get into football and readers of SBS know she has. I’ve written joyfully about it on this site. But Sunday, watching her heart broken and angry at the end of the Packers game, damn nearly made me cry.

Life sometimes makes me take pleasure in other people’s pain. Yankee fans come to mind. So do L.A. Lakers fans. And while we’re at it, Cubs fans, Eagles fans and Cowboys fans are on that list. Raiders fans used to be on that list, but gained respect in my eyes when they gave Brett Favre a standing O that fateful Monday night. Now, when is Duke going to start losing basketball games?

Life shows that from tragedy comes inspiration. As I watched the score of the Giants game Sunday, I smacked my forehead several times. I had predicted a Redskins win and felt I’d made a good argument. I never considered that the death of 89 year old owner Wellington Mara would inspire that team to beat the high holy shit out of Washington. I guess I never realized how beloved Well Mara was. Stupid me.

Life throws a happy curve sometimes. As I got on the train, I noticed that the coach car had been replaced by a business class car. Amtrak evidently had simply ran out of coach cars. So I write tonight from an extra large seat with more leg room and a curtain to make it cozy, no extra charge.

Life is a good. I’ve been working my buns off lately. My days are long and my weekends are short. I’m tired when I go to bed and I’m tired when I wake up. But every day I get to have an adventure. I meet new people, solve new problems, and get to tell my best friend about it every night. So on Sunday, you can rest assured that my best friend and I will be watching the Steelers and the Packers play, no matter how many interceptions Brett throws. And maybe, just maybe, we’ll catch a little bit of the Giants game during the commercials….

Week 8 picks... We're halfway home...

Hello SBS fans and welcome to our weekly picks! It’s your ol’ pal Samichlaus here. St. Ides has been under the weather this week so I have the honors of posting the picks. I’ve tried my best to figure out the color scheme and I hope it posts in the right colors. Remember, St. Ides’s picks are in Seahawk blue, my picks are in wounded Packer Green...

Hey man, I've been sick the past 3 days, so haven't been at work, and therefore haven't done my picks yet. Since I've slept like a ridiculous amount the past couple days and I'm up early to let my job know I'll be "working" from home today, here they are:

Hey dude, sorry you're feeling under the weather, but working from home ain't such a bad thing... especially when one has the NFL network!
Here's what I'll do, I can do my picks on the train home tonight and I'll post them for us. Do you have last weeks stats?
Let me know, and hope you feel better...

I can whip up last week's stats easily enough....

St. Ides:
Last Week: 8-6
Season: 42-59

Samichlaus:
Last Week: 7-7
Season: 53-48

Chiefs +6.5 over CHARGERS
The Chargers are suddenly getting a reputation for not closing out games, and that loss last week to Philly on the blocked FG return was awful. Just as last year everything kind of went their way as they went 12-4, this year seems to be the opposite. Meanwhile, this is a huge game for the Chiefs. They don't typically play well on the road, but they ought to be up for this divisional battle and their offense should keep it close. Chargers 26, Chiefs 24.

With an extra few days of rest under their belts and their first win in Miami in a loooonnggg time, the Chiefs are poised to win on the road. The Chargers meanwhile haven’t exactly played up to their potential lately. I like the Chiefs to win:
Chiefs 31 Bolts 24

Cardinals +9 over DALLAS
The loss last week to Seattle has got to be killing Parcells. It may also be the end of the resurgence displayed by Drew Bledsoe. The Dallas defense is pretty damn good, could even be scary good in a few years. But their offense isn't really that impressive, and their offensive line is hurting. Seattle got like 6 sacks last week, and they're not exactly known for pressuring the QB. I think Arizona keeps this one close, though they've got their own offensive woes. Low-scoring game. Cowboys 17, Cardinals 10.

Interesting analysis… here’s my take: Arizona is about ready for their yearly swan dive. You bet Dallas is pissed after last week’s game, and if you think they’re not going to be totally fired up at home you’re wrong. Dallas wins this easy.
Dallas 27 Cardinals 10


Bears +3 over LIONS
Tough call here. As predicted (and it really wasn't that hard to predict), Jeff Garcia led the Lions to victory last week when he replaced Joey Harrington as the starter. However, the Lions receiving corps is decimated by injuries, and that one guy is still suspended for smoking reefer. I think the Bears defense and running game is just good enough to win this game on the road. Barely. Bears 17, Lions 10.

Don’t tell me that it wasn’t that hard to predict! I was so busy making gay jokes last week that I totally blew the prediction. So no more homosexual references this week about Jeff Gaysia. This next part is really hard for me to write: the Bears are the cream of the NFC North. Jesus H. Christ in a chicken basket, it’s come to this. You have to admit, they play pretty good defense.
Bears 24 Lions 17

TEXANS -2 over Browns
The Texans have to win sometime this season, right? Uhhhh, right? They actually hung in there with the Colts for the first 3 quarters last week. Then they reverted to old form, and didn't cover the 13 points they were getting. Ugh. But it seems they figured out how to stop David Carr from getting sacked - don't throw the ball. They threw some ridiculous amount like 9 times all of last game. If they're going to win a game, why not this week, home against the Browns? Texans 20, Browns 16.

That boy is just too pretty, and frankly speaking the Texans really do not have any talent to speak of. The Browns, well I have to be honest SBS fans, I really can’t remember anything about the Browns. My brain is so fucking fried. I’m somewhere near Fredericksburg (judging by the clock) and the train is actually on time. This means I’ll be home at oh, 8:30. Holy fucknuts.
Browns 24 Carr-k suckers 15

Packers +9 over BENGALS
I'll leave most of the Packers and Favre commentary to Mr. Samichlaus, but Cinci was brought back to reality last week by the Steelers, who just ran the ball down their throat. I doubt the Packers decimated offense will be able to do the same, but if Favre likes those shootouts where he can throw and throw and throw and have a chance to pull it out in the end, this might be one of those games. Too many points to give Favre against a largely unproven young team. Bengals 26, Packers 20.

I think St. Ides pretty much hit the nail on the head. For what it’s worth, Favre has come out this week and essentially taken the blame for the season. His rational is that the Packers have lost 4 game by a total of 9 points, and that he as a playmaker should have figured out a way to win. No man is an island Brett, especially with the likes of Jevon Kearse coming after you. When you’re out there, I want you to remember something, something you may not know: Boomer Esiason called Carson Palmer the best young quarterback in the league. I want you to honestly watch him and tell me if he’s better than you. Here’s a hint: He ain’t.
Bengals 31 Packers 27

Jaguars +3.5 over RAMS
I don't think Bulger is back yet. Isaac Bruce and Torry Holt are still hurt. It took the Rams a little bit of luck, a patented Aaron Brooks choke, and a bad call by the refs to beat the Saints last week at home. Not to mention all the drama between Mike Martz and the front office. The Jaguars are tough to figure out, but they seem like a fairly well-rounded team. Hopefully they help Seattle solidify their hold on the NFC West even during their bye week. Jaguars 28, Rams 24.

With Martz out of the picture there’s a part of me that wants to pick “team turmoil” to win. But here’s what’s stopping me: that’s Martz’s hand picked coaching staff out there. The Rams are a train wreck in progress… shit, that’s a lousy metaphor right about now.
Just pulling into Fredericksburg…
Jaguars 34 Rams 17

SAINTS -2 over Dolphins
I think the Dolphins have come back to earth a bit after their overachieving start. I think the maddeningly inconsistent Saints are due for a good game. Saints 20, Dolphins 17.

Since their disaster in Green Bay the Saints have played pretty well. Miami on the other hand has been a disappointment, well at least to my father in law. I see it the other way: The Saints are due for another Superdome pile o dung performance. Could the metaphors get any worse?
Miami 37 – New Orleans 10

Vikings +8 over PANTHERS
Vikings pulled out the gutsy win last week to likely save Mike Tice's job... for another week at least.. The Panthers have been a bit up and down all season, and I think this spread reflects their popularity as a pre-season favorite in the NFC rather than their actual play. They probably win it at home, but I'll take a Culpepper who suddenly doesn't look so lost any more, and the points. Panthers 24, Vikings 19.

Don’t let the second half of that game last week fool you. That was less about what Culpepper and Co. did right and more about what the Packer defense did wrong. Carolina is a solid team with a good head coach. Unlike the Packers, the Cats will play 60 minutes of football and never let the Vikings in the game.
Carolina 34 Viqueens 10

TITANS -1.5 over Raiders
No clue in this game. The Raiders surprised people last week by spanking the Bills. I think McNair is still hurt, so Billy Volek keeps starting for the Titans. Whatever, this may be the crappiest game of the week. Titans 30, Raiders 28.

Shit Dude, I don’t know anything about these teams either. You’re right about Mc.Nair, I do know that. Hmm… OK, which team has Randy Moss? Got it.
Raiders 27 Titans 24

GIANTS -2 over Redskins
I think Eli showed everybody something last week with that win. And I think Mark Brunell is about due to come crashing to earth. This should be a pretty close game, as both offense-defense match ups are interesting. Giants 24, Redskins 20.

I’ve gotta say, I think we watched Eli grow up a bit last week. When he made that pass and the Giants won, I really had the feeling that I’d seen a rite of passage. I’ll be rooting for the Giants this week, but I think the Skins win. The Achilles heel for the Giants defense is their passing D. It’s one of the worst in the league. With the Redskins having to rely less on the “max protect” formation, Brunell will have a field day.
Skins 31 Giants 17

Eagles +3.5 over BRONCOS
Broncos suffered that crushing loss to Eli and crew, but at least it was on the road. Now they return home to face another NFC East team, and the team that it seems most "experts" still like as the NFC favorite. I have no clue what's going to happen. But I think the Eagles might be a little more for real than the Broncos. I think. Eagles 27, Broncos 24.

Weekly readers of this feature know by now that I have no fucking clue what to make of the Eagles. I’m sticking with my gut: they aren’t the cream of the NFC anymore. Denver at home is always a good bet. But can they cover? Sure, why not.
Denver 27 Eagles 21

Bucanneers -11 over NINERS
Yikes. The Niners threw Alex Smith to the wolves, and now he's hurt. They traded away second stringer Tim Rattay to the Bucs, and now they're left with Ken Dorsey. They got absolutely smoked by the "high-powered" Redskins offense last week. Needless to say, I won't be taking the Niners anytime soon. Bucs 33, Niners 17.

Ken Dorsey? Double yikes.
Bucs 41 – Niners 6

Bills +9 over PATRIOTS
I have no idea what to think of the Bills. Kelly Holcomb gets named starter, and suddenly they look like they could be a playoff team. Then they get lit up by the Raiders, and suddenly their defense (their alleged strength) seems suspect. Teddy Brusci might be back for this game, and that would be a huge lift for the Pats. I think they win this game fairly easily, but almost 10 points is a lot to give a divisional rival. Patriots 27, Bills 20.

I can’t begin to imagine what Foxboro is going to be like if Brusci returns. Think of Colorado and Todd Bertuzzi the other night, except like the opposite. Think Willis Reed on the court in 1970 (yep, ol’ Samichlaus remembers watching it on TV, kids) only multiplied by a factor of 6. The point is New England is going to be so fired up that they will absolutely crush Buffalo this week. Enjoy it, because this is when New England turns the corner and starts to dominate. Unless of course Teddy strokes out again.
New England 37 – Buffalo 17

STEELERS -9.5 over Ravens
The Steelers showed the AFC North who's the boss last week by going into Cinci and sending them back to reality. The Ravens just stink. Their QB sucks, Jamal Lewis is feeling the effects of spending a few months in jail (seriously), and both Ray Lewis and Ed Reed are out for their defense. This is another example of why the league should consider a dynamic schedule for Monday Night Football. This game hasn't looked attractive for weeks, and would any team really complain if they got only 2-3 week notice that they'd be playing on Monday night? Steelers 30, Ravens 10.

I guess the truth is Baltimore isn’t as good as I thought. Still, 9.5 is a lot to cover against a good defense. I read somewhere that the Steelers will run Bettis more this week and that this one is going to play like a smash-mouth low scoring affair. I’ll take the Ravens and the points:
Steelers 20 Ravens 13

The luckiest guys in the world

I have a very special relationship with my cousin. Before I met my wife he was my absolute best friend. We’d take trips together, have great meals together, go to cultural events together, and on those occasions where as St. Ides once put it “the drink may have flowed too freely”, we reveled in our everlasting adolescence together. He’s the one person in my family who I actually get along with. On the friend depth chart (if adults still keep such things) it goes my wife, my cousin, and all the rest. Well, that’s not true St. Ides cracked the top 5 this year and continues to move up the charts. We’ll re-visit that when my December final standings come out.

We grew up avid Mets fans. I was the product of a Brooklyn Dodger fanatic whose heart was broken in 1959 and somehow blamed this on the Yankees. My cousin is the product of an amazing union between a die hard Yankee fan and a die hard Red Sox fan who finally got her prayers answered last fall. Since we’re 4 years apart, I can’t imagine that he remembers the ’69 Mets (he was 3), but we spent the decade of the 70s being Mets fans together. These were the Frank Tavaras years, the time when the team was run by the miserly M. Donald Grant who in June of 1976 broke my heart by trading Tom Seaver to the Reds. It was a time of futility, a time of mediocrity, and a time when the other New York team had Reggie and Guidry and Thurman Munson to name a few.

By the 1980’s we were old enough to go to games together, and I was old enough to by the beer. $20.00 could get you four big beers at Shea, and in 1980 that was all the money in the world (and before you do the Math my cousin was 14). We spent a lot of days at Shea together throughout that decade. We were there in 1988 when the Mets clinched the division. We saw numerous games with what we called the “Tud Tickets”. These were the corporate box seats for the Alfred Mainzer Greeting Card Co., and were located on the Field level, first base, about the 4th row. Uncle Tud swept the floors for Mainzer and occasionally they’d throw him a bone and give him the tickets.

But as much of a Mets fan as I am, my cousin is the penultimate Mets fan. Not only does he bleed blue and orange, he shits it too. In little baseball shaped shits. Once he shit a shit that looked exactly like “Le Grande Orange” himself, Rusty Staub, as God as my witness. Time and distance and several nasty baseball strikes have waned my passion for the game. Living in Richmond hasn’t helped much either, as maybe 6 or 7 Mets games per year make it on the national broadcast. So last week when I found my commemorative 1986 World Champion Mets cap, given away on some forgotten evening in 1987 at Shea, I had to send it to him. See, not only is my cousin a huge Mets fan, so is his wife. Our conversation went something like this:

Ring Ring Ring….
“Samichlaus residence, hello?”
“Hey Dude”
“Hey Dude, what’s going on?”
“Dude, I just wanted to say thanks so much for the hat! That is so cool!”
“Yeah dude, when I saw it, I immediately thought of you and Lisa. You guys are like Mr. and Mrs. Met”
“Thanks dude”
“Man, dude, you are so lucky. It’s so cool that you found someone who loves the Mets as much as you do”
“Dude, there like 162 games in a season and I’d say that we watch at least 150 of ‘em”
“Duuuuuude!”

Men are truly blessed when they find wives that share their passions.

When I met Mrs. Samichlaus, she knew nothing and cared little about football. But she quickly saw my passion for the game and decided to learn. She knew that one of the keys to a good marriage was sharing common interests, so she agreed to learn about the Green Bay Packers. We would always watch the Packer games, no questions asked. I in turn agreed to (a) teach her what I knew and (b) giver her veto over any other game I wanted to watch.

And she learned about the Packers, and started to enjoy the games. The Packers, it seemed, played better when we watched together. They played better when we wore certain clothes. They played better when the autographed Brett Favre helmet was placed between us and the TV. They played better when she pounced on me and, well I better leave that one alone. So Sunday, with the Packers up 17 – 0 and the Vikings falling apart. She decided to go and take a nap.

“If things start to go bad”, she said, “wake me up”.

And I didn’t.

After the game when she woke, I sadly told her that the Packers had lost. Incredulous, she replied “You were supposed to wake me up!”

“Oh honey”, I said, “you needed to sleep and you know it really doesn’t make a difference”

“But you were supposed to wake me up!!!!”

She wasn’t happy with me, not one bit.

Things stayed quiet in the Samichlaus house for a while until a little after 7:00. I was in the kitchen doing dishes when I heard something that sounded like a football game coming from my living room. Thinking I was mistaken, I continued with my chore, but no… this was definitely a football game. I calmly walked into the living room and found my wife glued to the Giants – Broncos game.

“They can win if they score a touchdown, and they have the ball” she said, her eyes never shifting from the screen.

“Who?” I inquired

“THE GIANTS!!! GOD!!!” And then she observed: “Manning looks so puny out there…”

I was surprised with her familiarity with Eli Manning. She actually knew about him.

We watched the end of the game, the Giants drove, and when Manning threw the TD with almost no time on the clock, we both screamed in joy.

“Son of a bitch”, said Mrs. Samichlaus, “I can’t believe I’m watching football games on my own and enjoying them!”

She wasn’t upset by this, not one bit.

My cousin and I are the two luckiest fuckers I know.

Over and out.

At 1 – 5 and with an offense decimated by injury, the Green Bay Packers season is done. But what keeps me up at night, gnawing at my ample gut is this: Can Brett Favre be far behind? It’s not that Favre doesn’t have the talent any more because man oh man he does. Favre made a throw to Robert Ferguson the week Mrs. Samichlaus and I were in Green Bay that only he could make: backpedaling, moving left, and throwing right 25 yards…for a touchdown. This week, Favre made an equally breathtaking pass: moving right and back, leaping into the air, and throwing 30 yards downfield… for a touchdown. But Favre’s unbridled enthusiasm has seemed to wane. No longer is he the wide eyed passionate QB who led his team on guts and enthusiasm. Favre appeared to be going through the motions Sunday, even as the Packers lead 17 – 0

This isn’t exactly unfathomable. Favre looks out and does not see Mike Wahle, Marco Rivera and Mike Flanagan protecting him on the offensive line. In their place he sees rookie Will Whiticker, second year second stringer Scott Wells and journeyman Adrian Klemm.. He looks left and does not see Javon Walker or Robert Ferguson for that matter. He sees 5’ 9” Arena League receiver Antonio Chatman. He looks right and most of the time does not see Bubba Franks lining up at tight end. He sees street free agent Donald Lee, an undrafted player with some talent who looks pretty good when the passes are coming from the greatest quarterback in Packer history. When he hands off the ball to his half back he does not see Ahman Green or Najeh Davenport, both gone for the season with career threatening injuries. He sees instead third string backup Tony Fisher. When Fisher runs, it’s no longer William Henderson at fullback leading the way. At age 36 Henderson has given way to Vontay Leach, a decent enough player right now with tremendous upside.

The only familiar sights Favre sees are Donald Driver, Mark Tauscher and Chad Clifton.

In the second quarter my wife remarked “Favre looks like he’s in shock”. She was the one who picked up non Favre’s lack of enthusiasm. By the third quarter, Favre had no one to throw to, no one to hand the ball to, no one to block for the runners and no one to protect him.

And still with 2:30 left, down 3, Favre took the likes of Fisher and Lee and Chatman and whoever else was out there down the field to the Vikings 25 yard line. He completed passes. He ran. He managed the clock impeccably, and suddenly the joy returned to his eyes. He made his team of third string players look like Pro Bowlers and when he took them to third and three on the Vikings 25 yard line with about a minute to go, he needed a first down.

Unlike his coach, Brett Favre doesn’t play for a tie. But Brett Favre doesn’t get to call the plays, Mike Sherman does. Sherman, whose only playmakers on the field were Favre and wide receiver Donald Driver inexplicably decided to put the ball in the hands of someone else. He called for a run. With the clock running the Packers set up in a shotgun formation. Favre began the count and suddenly the ball was in his hands. The center, second year second stringer Scott Wells had snapped the ball early catching Favre by surprise. Favre quickly executed an inside handoff to Tony Fisher, but guard Adrian Klemm who was equally surprised by the quick snap missed his block. Fisher was stuffed.

And so out came Ryan Longwell, who had already missed two field goals to kick a game tying field goal with 36 seconds on the clock.

Favre retreated to the bench and began to prepare for the overtime while the Vikings began to move the ball. With 8 seconds on the clock the Vikings took their last time out. The were holding the ball on their own 45 and realistically had two options: they could try to throw an out pattern and get into field goal range or take a shot down field. The cameras quickly shot to the sideline to show Favre studying the pictures of the last drive. He glanced up for a moment and returned to his preparation. The Packers defense would know to defend the sidelines forcing Daunte Culpepper to throw over the middle. The clock would expire. Favre would have his chance in overtime. During the time-out defensive coordinator Jim Bates reminded his players not to allow the Vikings to get out of bounds, to force them to complete the pass in the middle. And so it went, Culpepper took the snap and looked down field, and suddenly changed his focus to about 12 yards downfield where Joey Thomas had allowed a Viking receiver to get open on the sideline. Thomas, a second year second round pick had forgotten Bates’s instructions and had played the corner soft, effectively defending the middle of the field. Culpepper completed the pass and the receiver stepped out of bounds with two seconds on the clock.

Now Favre put the paper aside and began to pay attention. The Vikings kicker Paul Eddinger trotted out on the field to attempt a 56 yard field goal. Eddinger in his prior game against the Bears had been terrible, and had been the butt of Head Coach Mike Tice’s musings during practice (Tice had quipped that he had a memo from the Commissioners office stating that Paul Eddinger was allowed to make field goals this week).

56 yards. Two seconds left. And Eddinger stuck it, right between the goal posts.

Favre sat motionless for several minutes. It was like a dagger in his heart. Whatever joy Favre had recaptured in that final drive was gone. Favre sat, and sat some more, then quietly left the field.

How much more will Brett Favre play? Will he see this season as a bust, lost to insurmountable injuries to practically his entire offense? Will he then seize the opportunity to play one more season with everyone healthy, one last run for glory? Or will Favre give in to the utter anguish I saw on his face Sunday? When the football history books are written will it be the smallest of men, the kicker Paul Eddinger, who struck the final blow that brought down the great warrior Favre?

I can’t imagine that. Actually, I just don't want to.

But if Favre looks at this team filled with rejects and misfits and decides that this is enough, I wouldn’t blame him.

World Series Thoughts

The fan(s) asked for it, so here it is… Talking some baseball!

First of all, let me say the playoffs have been fairly disappointing to watch so far. Aside from the huge homer by Pujols and some late inning heroics from Houston, not a whole lot to get excited about. The game the other night when the Astros clinched was a snoozefest. Everybody was talking about how Poo-hole's home run was a backbreaker, how it was now a given that the Cardinals would return home and win the final two games. Ummm, wrong. They couldn't even force a Game 7.

So let's recap the first two rounds, SBS style:

The Red Sox bad pitching caught up with them in a big way. To the point where Curt Schilling did not even get to make a single start for them! Read that line again. Schilling did not even start for them. So my prediction for him getting shelled and losing the series didn't come true because he didn't get a chance. Manny and Pappi didn't exactly light it up either, and suddenly the Red Sox championship is a distant memory.

On the flip side, the White Sox are playing out of their gourds right now. Four complete game wins from their starting pitching to take the series?! Are you kidding me? Wow. More on the White Sox in a moment.

The Yankees.. Well, what can you say… They couldn't get it done, led by some craptacular hitting from A-Rod. God, I hate him. I'm not a Yankees fan, but being surrounded by them, I do follow the team quite a bit. I think getting A-Fraud was a huge mistake, and I'll continue to think that until he steps up in the postseason and helps win a World Series. For those of you who missed it, in the 9th inning of Game 5.. Jeter led off with a base hit. Then A-Rod grounded into a double play. Two more back to back singles, before Matsui (who stunk it up in the series as well) made the final out. Three basehits in an inning usually gets you at least one run.

Then, this past week, A-Rod's mom talks to the newspapers and says little Alex was effected by the death of the uncle who helped raise him. And that's why he played so god awful. But he didn't want to make excuses, so he didn't tell anybody. Whatever. Suck it up. I mean, I don't mean to sound cold, but players' family members die fairly often. And sometimes they play well, and sometimes they don't. Do the emotions make a difference one way or another? Maybe sometimes. Maybe not other times. The thing I want to know is when exactly did this uncle die? If he died before the series, how did he know it would sound like an excuse? Shouldn't he have been confident in his ability, and not worried about making excuses for poor play that hadn't happened yet? If it happened during the series, then what's the reason for sucking in the pre-death games? Either way, this sort of "leaked" excuse story just makes me hate the guy more.

In the National league, not much to say. The Padres were barely a .500 team, and played like it. The Braves had their annual early playoff exit. And the Cardinals could not get it done even after the huge momentum shifting homer by Pujols.

So now we have the Astros, who haven't won a World Series in their 40-year existence. And the White Sox, who haven't won since like 1918. The "experts" are hyping that point, as both teams would really treasure a Championship. The "experts" are also saying that with the way both pitching staffs have pitched, it should be a low-scoring, close series. I hope they're right. Because I really don't give much of a shit who wins.

So, since we all know pitching wins Championships, who would you rather have? Clemens, Pettitte, Oswalt, and Backe. Or El Duque, Buerhle, Garland, Contreras, and Garcia. The White Sox have better depth from their starters. But in the postseason, really only your top 3 matter. They'll likely pitch 2 games each if it goes 7 games. And this one just might go seven. At least, for us viewers' sakes, let's hope so.

Prediction: Houston in 7.
WS MVP: Andy Pettitte. I think Pettitte has been underrated and underappreciated his whole career. Most of that has to do with never really being the clear cut #1 pitcher on the Championship Yankee teams or in Houston. Some of it has to do with some injuries he's fought through. Although I don't think his regular season numbers are quite Hall of Fame material (172-91, 1525 Ks, 3.78 ERA), he's been clutch in the playoffs. He has two 21-win seasons on his resume, and 5 more seasons of 15+ wins. I've always like the guy, even if those "Power of Living" commercials led to several "Hey Andy! How about reading the Power of Pitching!" jeers from the crowd when he struggled. That's some funny shit.

Week 7 Picks

Time for another week or prophesizing prophecies!

The score so far:

Last Week -
Samichlaus: 8-6
St. Ides: 7-7

Overall -
Samichlaus: 46-41
St. Ides: 34-53

On to the picks...

Detroit +2.5 over CLEVELAND
Joey Harrington, bench. Bench, Joey Harrington. You two get acquainted because Jeff "Light In The Loafers" Garcia is back from his broken leg, and he's been taking half the snaps with the starting offense this week. I think he starts, and sparks the Lions to the win. Lions 23, Browns 20.

Earlier this week after taking several snaps under center, Jeff Garcia reported being a little stiff. Afterwards when asked if he was ever afraid to blow a lead, Garcia responded “I don’t know, who does he play for?” Garcia remains the only football player to have a plaque at the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown. The plaque, erected in 2002 pays homage to Garcia’s single season record for taking foul balls in the face. Cleveland 23 – Detroit 17 in the Samichlaus stinker of the week.

Green Bay +0.5 over MINNESOTA
The Vikings are an absolute train wreck. No way Tice makes it through the season. No frickin way. And this might be his last shot. In a home game against a struggling Packers team, the Vikings need to win this divisional game to save the coach's job. But do they care? Do the players want Tice gone? Maybe. In any case, the Packers suddenly found their offense when the Samichlaus clan descended (or is it ascended, since it's so far north?) upon Lambeau two weeks ago. Ahman Green is back healthy again too, which should help. Packers 31, Vikings 20.

I think the odds makers are right. As shitty as the Viking are (and friends, this is a shitdiggity shitty team) they always play Green Bay tough as nails. The addition of ex Packer Darren Sharper to the Vikings along with Mike Sherman’s simplification of the offense will make this game close. Green Bay 24 – Cock Suckers 20

HOUSTON +14.5 over Indy
These damn Colts and their huge spreads are killing me every week. Last week they spotted the Rams a 17-0 2nd quarter lead (make it 30 and a half with the 13.5 spread), and still roared back to cover rather easily. Ugh. Seattle pounded Houston last week, and it's getting downright ugly. But they have to win a game, or at least get a few lucky bounces and keep it close sometime this season, right? I'll probably hate myself for this, but that extra half point is the difference maker. Colts 27, Texans 13.

I know Indy is good, but I agree: how long can this trend keep up? I call on the paternal wisdom of Papa St. Ides and throw caution to the wind… I’m taking the home dog. Colts 20 – Texans 17

Chiefs +2.5 over MIAMI
This game has been moved up to Friday night because of the hurricane in the area. That's probably an advantage for the Dolphins, since it likely throws off the Chiefs travel plans a bit. Still, the Dolphins have overachieved a bit, and the Chiefs have dropped back to earth after a nice start. I still think the Chiefs have enough talent to win the AFC West. And their defense is much improved over past seasons. Chiefs 23, Dolphins 17.

The Chiefs are getting 2.5? Here we go again. They didn’t play on Monday night, did they? Man this sucks. I’m on an Amtrak somewhere north of Fredericksburg. I have no Internet access so I can’t look up any stats. I’m friggin winging all of these picks. Of course I shouldn’t complain. I have the nicest computer the Feds give out and all my co-workers are jealous. Ha! Wait until they see my penis! Oh, looks like we’re pulling into Fredericksburg. Only another hour to go. SBS fans rejoice, Samichlaus has plenty of time to write! As far as the game is concerned, I’m going to take Miami. I think that Mr. Saban will have Mr. Ricky and Co. ready to go. Miami 24 KC 17

RAMS -0.5 over New Orleans
The spread really should be more than this with the Rams at home. But with Marc Bulger out, career backup Jamie Martin gets the start at QB. That should mean a steady dose of Steven Jackson being rammed (pun intended) down the Saints throat. Have you seen this dude play yet? He's built like a tight end and runs like a wideout. He can be scary good. But of course with Martz, the Rams are totally pass wacky most games. Not with Bulger out. The spread should be more like 3 or 4 at least, even with Bulger out. Rams 33, Saints 27.

No, I haven’t seen him play!! He’s that good, huh? Oh wait, sorry. We’re not having a private conversation. My bad. The Saints have been on again off again fairly consistently this season. Last week they were on, this week they’re scheduled to be off. On the other hand, how can you have any confidence in a guy who goes by “Jamie”? That’s a chicks name. There are some names grown men should not use. It’s James, ass wipe. Grow the fuck up. And while you’re at it, fetch me Timmy Chang’s number. Someone has to straighten that kid out. You ever meet a chick that goes with a guy’s name? It’s all cute at first. “Hi! I’m Sam” or “Hey, I’m Nicki!” or “Hey, I’d like you to meet my friend Fred” (I actually dated a girl whose middle name was Frederica and went by Fred) Yep, all cute until you start having sex with ‘em. Then you’re put into the uncomfortable position of shooting your load while screaming “Oh Fred, oh Fred”. That shit can fuck with your head for years. Fred and I never had sex. We dated but I just couldn’t bring myself to it. Rams 27 Saints 10

Pittsburgh +0.5 over CINCI
Are the Bengals for real? I think so. But they are still relatively young. And despite with Boomer Esiason might say, Carson Palmer will still hit some bumps in the road as he matures. This is one of those bumps. A divisional game against a tough D, should be pretty close, but I think the Steelers pull it out. Steelers 24, Bengals 23.

It took you until week six to call me on that? Kudos. I like the Steelers in this game as well. Big Ben’s healthy, right? Assuming he is I think the Steelers romp. If he isn’t, then Tommy Maddox is a viable alternative. Tommy. Hmm… add that one to the list. Pittsburgh 27 - Bengals 17

San Diego +4.5 over PHILLY
You may or may not know by now, but Chargers RB LaDainian Tomlinson has been going by the nickname "LT". Anybody who has followed football through the 80s knows the original "LT", of course, is Lawrence Taylor, one of the most feared linebackers to ever play the game. One of the writers on these "experts" websites complained about Tomlinson not having an original nickname. The following week, a correction was printed - apparently Tomlinson asked Taylor for, and received, permission to go by the "LT" moniker. I'm not sure what that means. But here's what I know - this "LT" is frickin unstoppable if given the ball enough. Chargers 28, Eagles 24.

Now that’s some in depth analysis. And let me plug the site just this once: St. Ides and I have real jobs that pay big bucks and consume our time, and still my partner has the time to track down the inside scoop on stuff like this. You ungrateful readers should appreciate us dammit. Send us flowers and shit. Or better, tell all of your friends about SBS and patronize our advertisers. Oh wait, we don’t have any!!! No ads. No annoying popups. No articles lately either but we wont talk about that. Anyway, I basically agree with everything St. Ides said. Plus, if you haven’t noticed it the Eagles are in a decline. I’m sure that half our readers haven’t noticed it because his eyes are all weepy watching the decline of the Patriots.
Chargers 31 Eagles 14

San Fran +12.5 over WASHINGTON
Another one of these huge spreads that I don't know what to do about. The Redskins have been brought back to reality a bit after starting off undefeated, and that narrow escape against Seattle. The Niners traded away their opening day starter Tim Rattay to the Bucs, so it's all in the hands of #1 pick Alex Smith now. The Skins defense ought to give them fits, but will the offense really run up the score that high? Probably. But I just can't give that many points… Redskins 22, Niners 10.

Man, that’s a lot of points. I’m not sure if the Skins are good enough to cover and I’m not sure if the Niners are bad enough not to cover. The easy answer is Alex Smith is nowhere near ready and Joe Gibbs’s defense is pretty darn good. Washington 24 San Fran 7


SEATTLE -3.5 over Dallas
It looks like the most dangerous point of Ken Hamlin's injuries are behind him, as he's been moved out of intensive care into a private room. No word on when or if he'll play again. But I think the Seahawks are finally starting to click. When these two teams played in the pre-season, the Cowboys disrupted the offense by blitzing constantly. After the game, Holmgren pretty much admitted that they don’t "gameplan" for pre-season games, and didn't really expect so many blitzes for a pre-season game. Rookie Cowboy LB Demarcus Ware was all over the place. Mr. Ware, meet Mr. Walter Jones. Who has not allowed a sack since 2002. This is the regular season, Seattle will pick up the blitz, and Drew Bledsoe has to fall to earth someday, right? Seahawks 27, Cowboys 20.

Not much I can add to that. I think Seattle wins outright, but I also think the Cowboys keep it close. This one comes down to a field goal so take the Boys and the points. Seattle 24 – Dallas 20

BEARS -1.5 over Baltimore
Two good defenses. Two bad offenses. I think the Ravens offense is slightly worse, and Chicago is at home. This game gets the "St. Ides Snoozefest of the Week" Award. Bears 16, Ravens 13.

Nice! Yeah, I didn’t see this one on the schedule earlier. Absolutely the “Samichlaus Stinker of the week” hands down. Oh, and I don’t care what it is but take the under. Ravens 17 – em-Bear-asses 10 (Editor's Note: The Over/Under is 30.5)

Buffalo +3.5 over OAKLAND
The Raiders are starting to fall apart. Moss is listed as doubtful, which means he probably won't play. The Kelly Holcomb era in Buffalo is off to a good start. Remember, this Buffalo team got off to a slow start last year too before roaring back and almost making the playoffs. Bills 25, Raiders 16.

Randy plays when he wants to play and he don’t want to play. I think the Bills win it outright as well. Raider nation isn’t what it used to be. Much like Lambeau, the mystique is gone, and teams aren’t afraid to go to Oakland and win. Bills 24 Raiders 17

GIANTS -2.5 over Denver
Every week I say Jake Plummer is due for a bad game. And every week he proves me wrong. I'm going to keep saying it until I'm right, dammit. Plus Denver has overachieved a bit I think, and the Giants need to bounce back from that tough loss to Dallas last week. Giants 27, Broncos 20.

Home cooking sure tastes good in New Jersey. The Giants are a young team with some talent and a head coach who I personally think is terrific (albeit a bit anal retentive). Remember the wisdom of Mike the bartender in regards to Denver: “They suck on the road” Giants 27 Denver 17

ARIZONA -3.5 over Tennessee
I'm enjoying watching the trendy choice Cardinals struggle. Not just because I hate the "experts", not just because they're in the same division as Seattle, but also because Chike Okeafor left Seattle for Arizona and bad-mouthed the team, saying it didn't have the right winning attitude and some other doodoo. Uhhhh, Chike. When was the last time the Cardinals even had a winning season? Enjoy! Actually, we don't know who'll be playing QB this week, McCown or Warner. Either way, the Titans should be just bad enough to lose on the road. Cardinals 24, Titans 13.

Chike. Good heavens. I’m so done with Tennessee. Every time I pick them they lose and every time I go against them they win. I’m going to do St. Ides a favor: Arizona 27 Titans 14

ATLANTA -7.5 over Jets
Jets suck. Falcons 27, Jets 10.

How is Vick’s herpes infested penis these days? I think the Jets keep it surprisingly close, but Atlanta wins. I’m taking the Jets and the points.
Vicks Herpes Infested Penis 27 Just Exclaim Testeverde Sucks 24

Greetings from the Amtrak

Greetings SBS fans! Ol’ Samichlaus is back in action after four days on the new job. That’s right, it finally happened. I’ve left the capital of the Confederacy for the greener pastures of the grand Union and have taken a job in Washington DC with Uncle Sam. Now, I’ve said before on these pages that I’m just too smart to blog about work, but I will say this: Samichlaus misses his old friends in Richmond and around the world. Oh, and the new organization runs with the efficiency of the Minnesota Vikings.


So let’s talk about the Vikings. It’s easy as a Packer fan to hate the Vikings. They always play the Packers tough, the best of Packer teams have not had success in Minnesota, and there’s that whole Randy Moss thing. So suffice it to say when the story broke last week that Vikings safety Fred Smoot had rented two party boats, loaded them with Viking Players, booze and hookers, and had a wild sex orgy, your ol’ pal Samichlaus was tickled pink. Packer fans have always known that the Vikings are a morally bankrupt organization whose head coach may or may not be as smart as my dog. For years the symbol of their success was Randy Moss, a smart and gifted athlete who squandered his talent with attitude and a questionable work ethic.

That’s what really gets Packer fans the most.

If one thing is evident in Wisconsin, it’s that the people who live there are very friendly and very hard working. What ever they lack in talent they make up for in perseverance, and their football team has always mirrored that. Look at Lombardi’s teams and tell me, who was the dominant player at his position? Starr? Not compared to Unitas. Hornung? Gifford was a better player. Taylor? I’ll take Jim Brown thank you very much. Maybe Nitchke, though Bears fans can argue that Butkis had the edge. Even Brett Favre has always had statistically better quarterbacks in every season he’s played. But you’d never hear Starr or Favre or Nitchke or any of them say “I play when I want to play” ala Moss. The Vikings are the team with all the talent, picked by every major sports publication to dominate the division, struggling at 1- 4 and heading nowhere. The team is in disarray, as evidenced by their head coach who upon hearing the news of Smoot’s sex party remarked ‘I’m not happy about this’.

But I can assure you of one thing: the Vikings will be ready to play the Packers this Sunday.

Now there’s no reason why the Packers can’t win and win big. Since the second half of the Carolina game the team has been clicking. The game that Mrs. Samichlaus and I happened to see was nothing short of miraculous. However the Packers can not afford to take the Vikings lightly. They need to run the ball well or Ted Cottrell’s blitzing defense will have a field day teeing off on Favre. They need to play solid defense. They need to continue to play smart, forcing turnovers and keeping penalty free. They need to be professional and machine like. This alone will do more damage to the Vikings than anything.

Last week I wrote that Mike Tice would be fired. The fact that he still has a job is indicative of how God awful that organization is. If the Packers win, and Tice doesn’t lose his job in the following days, that will send a clear message to Vikings fans: Your owner really doesn’t give a shit about you and neither does your team.

But Packer fans have always known that too.

Thoughts on the Amtrak

Greetings SBS fans! Ol’ Samichlaus is back in action after four days on the new job. That’s right, it finally happened. I’ve left the capital of the Confederacy for the greener pastures of the grand Union and have taken a job in Washington DC with Uncle Sam. Now, I’ve said before on these pages that I’m just too smart to blog about work, but I will say this: Samichlaus misses his old friends in Richmond and around the world. Oh, and the new organization runs with the efficiency of the Minnesota Vikings.


So let’s talk about the Vikings. It’s easy as a Packer fan to hate the Vikings. They always play the Packers tough, the best of Packer teams have not had success in Minnesota, and there’s that whole Randy Moss thing. So suffice it to say when the story broke last week that Vikings safety Fred Smoot had rented two party boats, loaded them with Viking Players, booze and hookers, and had a wild sex orgy, your ol’ pal Samichlaus was tickled pink. Packer fans have always known that the Vikings are a morally bankrupt organization whose head coach may or may not be as smart as my dog. For years the symbol of their success was Randy Moss, a smart and gifted athlete who squandered his talent with attitude and a questionable work ethic.

That’s what really gets Packer fans the most.

If one thing is evident in Wisconsin, it’s that the people who live there are very friendly and very hard working. What ever they lack in talent they make up for in perseverance, and their football team has always mirrored that. Look at Lombardi’s teams and tell me, who was the dominant player at his position? Starr? Not compared to Unitas. Hornung? Gifford was a better player. Taylor? I’ll take Jim Brown thank you very much. Maybe Nitchke, though Bears fans can argue that Butkis had the edge. Even Brett Favre has always had statistically better quarterbacks in every season he’s played. But you’d never hear Starr or Favre or Nitchke or any of them say “I play when I want to play” ala Moss. The Vikings are the team with all the talent, picked by every major sports publication to dominate the division, struggling at 1- 4 and heading nowhere. The team is in disarray, as evidenced by their head coach who upon hearing the news of Smoot’s sex party remarked ‘I’m not happy about this’.

But I can assure you of one thing: the Vikings will be ready to play the Packers this Sunday.

Now there’s no reason why the Packers can’t win and win big. Since the second half of the Carolina game the team has been clicking. The game that Mrs. Samichlaus and I happened to see was nothing short of miraculous. However the Packers can not afford to take the Vikings lightly. They need to run the ball well or Ted Cottrell’s blitzing defense will have a field day teeing off on Favre. They need to play solid defense. They need to continue to play smart, forcing turnovers and keeping penalty free. They need to be professional and machine like. This alone will do more damage to the Vikings than anything.

Last week I wrote that Mike Tice would be fired. The fact that he still has a job is indicative of how God awful that organization is. If the Packers win, and Tice doesn’t lose his job in the following days, that will send a clear message to Vikings fans: Your owner really doesn’t give a shit about you and neither does your team.

But Packer fans have always known that too.

Hamlin Hospitalized

First, the game news... I took the Rams last night, plus 13 and a half. I figured their offense is almost good enough to hang with the Colts, and the Colts are due for a letdown. When I got home from a dinner out, it was already Rams 17-0 in the second quarter. "Great," I thought to myself. "That means, with the spread, it's 30.5-0, I'm in pretty good shape!" Or so I thought. Bulger went down with a sprained shoulder, and the Colts proceeded to outscore the Rams 45-11 in the final 3 quarters. Ouch.

And speaking of ouch…. Bad news out of Seattle..

Safety Ken Hamlin is hospitalized with a fractures skull and a brain hemorrhage after being involved in a brawl outside a club Sunday night. The story goes that Hamlin and his girlfriend were attempting to leave the club, and someone was in their way. Hamlin touched a man on the back and said excuse me. The guy turned around, and pushed Hamlin, and started yelling at him. The bouncers got involved, and broke it up. But they kept yelling at one another. When it finally seemed like things had cooled down, and everybody was ready to disperse, Hamlin broke away from the bouncers, and ran at the man. And sucker-punched him. Two men then jumped Hamlin, and knocked him to the ground. While he was down, a man grabbed what's been described as "a street sign" and bashed Hamlin over the head with it, while he was down. And, sadly, it seems like the club's security video confirms this. You can actually view the footage at this Seattle news website.

Now, without going into too much editorial about young gifted athletes, and how they make mistakes, let me just say I hope Hamlin is okay. He's a promising young player, and hasn't gotten into trouble in the past. This is something that was in his control, he _could_ have walked away from the fight, but he chose not to. And now he's suffering the consequences. Unlike another sad story this week, where that kid from the Atlanta Hawks died from a heart attack. It's just sad when these young men get seriously hurt or even die, and it puts the actual "game" in perspective a little bit.

But the Hamlin story gets even stranger… Apparently, several witnesses at the club did give the police names of the attackers. But they were still on the loose. Or so they thought until this morning. Apparently one of the suspects turned up dead, shot and killed. His body was found at a local park the following morning. And supposedly the corpse's brother told police that yes, it was his brother involved with the Hamlin assault. But the victim isn't exactly a model citizen, he has a long criminal record, and seems like a general lowlife.

So, now what? Well, I guess we wait for the police to sort it out. But there's one big question lingering here: Did the guy's death have anything to do with him attacking Hamlin? Or was it just coincidence, since the guy was obviously a criminal? It could go either way, really. But say, for a moment, that it does turn out that the murderer of the assaulter turns out to be connected to Hamlin? Does that effect his career? I'm thinking no. Considering Ray Lewis was AT the scene of the crime when his boys murdered two men, and he got off clean. Hamlin was unconscious in a hospital bed whenever any "revenge" attack might have taken place.

Still, it's a strange, sad, and scary story. And I'm sure the rest of the media will be all over it soon enough. You heard it hear first!

Week 6 Picks

A little late, and I'm not going to put together the overall records so far right now, but here ya go! :P

Atlanta -4.5 over NEW ORLEANS
Let's just say the Saints performance in Green Bay didn't exactly make them favorites to make the Super Bowl. Duece MacAllister is now done for the season, and Joe Horn has leg issues. That puts it all in the hands of Aaron Brooks. Nuff said. Falcons 27, Saints 16.

I don't know what to make of the Saints. It's the tale of two teams: the tough team that fight you tooth and nail and the absolute garbage that polluted Green Bay last week. What happened to the Saints last week was almost laughable. You don't recover from that, especially against another good defense. Plus Vick and his herpes infested penis have been practicing. Vick's Herpes Infected Penis & Co. 38 Aints 10

Carolina +1.5 over DETROIT
Detroit still has some serious issues on offense. Carolina is still underachieving. Panthers 24, Lions 17.

I like the Cats too, but I think that Mariucci will have Detroit ready to play. Detroit can take control of the NFC North with a win, but I have to say: Carolina is the more desperate team. The rule of the more desperate team always trumps all others. Cats 27 Lions 24

Cinci -3.5 over TENNESSEE
So the Bengals lost a tough game on the road in prime time. Do they bounce back? I think so, but just barely. Bengals 31, Titans 27.

Boomer Esiason called Carson Palmer the best young quarterback in the NFL. I think that Tennessee is over rated, but considering the injury to Ben Rothelisberger I'm starting Steve McNair on my fantasy team. I like St. Ides take, and I'm not going to disagree just for the sake of disagreeing, but I do think that Cinci covers. Cinci wins, 34 -24

Cleveland +5.5 over BALTIMORE
Suddenly, the Baltimore defense doesn't look as intimidating or dominant. And the offense led by Anthony "How Am I Starting In The NFL?" Wright has redefined the word "scary". Meanwhile, the Browns and Trent Dilfer have surprised some people by staying in games. WR phenom (and Michigan grad) Braylon Edwards is out with a weird elbow staph infection, but they should be okay without him. Browns 17, Ravens 13.

This is another one of those games where the spread makes no sense to me. Sort of like that Jets game last week (and I wasn't exactly right about that one), I really don't get the spread. I like Cleveland to win outright but since I have no fucking idea what I'm talking about I'll say Baltimore 17, Cleveland 14

PITTSBURGH - 1.5 over Jacksonville
Jacksonville's offense is still way too erratic. So is their defense for that matter. Although Big Ben is still questionable for this game, it looks like Tommy Maddox has recovered enough to start. He should be good enough to win. Of course, if Maddox can't play either, that puts the game in the hands of Charlie "How Do I Even Have A 3rd String Job In The NFL" Batch. Then all bets are off. Steelers 24, Jaguars 17.

I see a low scoring game with a lot of running, but I do see Pittsburgh winning easily. Again, I don't get the close spread...
Pittsburgh 20 - Jacksonville 15

TAMPA BAY -4.5 over Miami
Embarassing display by the Bucs against the Jets last week. Just awful. I think Gruden gets them pumped up enough for this inter-state rivalry to give Gus Frerotte fits. Bucanneers 20, Dolphins 10.

OK, here's one where we disagree. I'm totally sold on Nick Saban. I don't know when it happened but I've realized something. This years Dolphins remind of the 1992 Packers (Holmgren's first year), and I see an upset looming.
Miami wins 27 - 10 in the Samichlaus Shocker of the week.

Minnesota +3.5 over CHICAGO
Where to start…. I'll save the whole "sex cruise" story for another time, but I think it's safe to say it's been a distraction this week. Which means everybody is picking the Vikings to lose in Chicago. Which is really the only reason I'm picking them. Because everybody is going to take the Bears. If Daunte Culpepper can just hold onto the fricking ball, this could still be a potent offense. I'll take the Bears too, but not to cover. Bears 21, Vikings 20.

The Vikings are reeling and the Bears know how to play defense. The Vikings are falling apart and are ripe for the picking. Plus, oral sex weakens the legs. So does anal. One time I took it up the ass and couldn't walk right for a week.
The Bears still suck, but will score 2 TD's on defense. Bears 27 - Viqueens 13 ...and look for Mike Tice to lose his job on Monday.

Giants +3.5 over DALLAS
Everybody is talking about how the Cowboys beat the crap out of Philly last week. And how this could turn around their whole season. Uhm, news flash: Philly really isn't THAT good. They have NO running game, and their QB is banged up. This should be a shootout though, but I think Dallas still sucks, and it's only a matter of time that Drew Bledsoe crashes back to earth. Would you believe that Bledsoe is the #1 QB as far as Fantasy Football scoring goes? Neither would I. But it's true. Giants 33, Cowboys 27.

This is one of the best matchups of the week. I like both these teams but I'm giving the edge to the Cowboys. Here's why: last week when the Cowboys were up, I thing, 17 - 3 they faced 4th and 2 from the 12. Rather than kick the field goal, Parcells went for it and the Cowboys scored a TD. That SBS fans took balls, and that SBS fans was the turning point for the Cowboys.
Cowboys 31 Giants 20

Washington +5.5 over KANSAS CITY
Last week, I said the Skins would lose in Denver, but keep it close. They did. I'm going to say the same thing this week. I don't know who that is in the Mark Brunell costume, but he's actually playing pretty well. Chiefs 24, Redskins 20.

It's none other than Sonny Jurgenson. The Chiefs are so freaking tough at home, and the Skins really don;t match up well against them. The Skins come back to reality. I'm taking K.C. to cover. Chiefs 35 Redskins 20

New Englad +3.5 over DENVER
Tough, tough schedule for the Pats. They're beat up. Still, I'll take the Pats D confusing the hell out of Jake "Somehow I Haven't Blown A Game Yet This Seaon" Plummer, and Brady willing his team to win. Patriots 26, Broncos 24.

New England's dynasty days are over. They're beat up, the defense is faltering and Denver is tough at home. And yet, I can not pick against them. Call me a fool, but I think they win it outright as well. New England 20 Denver 15

BUFFALO -3.5 over Jets
I like the Kelly Holcomb Era in Buffalo so far. And the Vinny Era probably comes back to reality this week. Bills 20, Jets 13.

I don't know what to say. Do I owe Jets fans an apology? The Jets showed me something last week and 'ol Samichlaus knows when to man up and admit he was wrong. With that said, the Bills at home will win by 10. Bills 25 Jets 15

San Diego -2.5 over OAKLAND
The Chargers hung in there against the Steelers on Monday night, but couldn't get it done. The Raiders are nowhere near the class of the Steelers. And although it's in Oakland, and this is a divisional game, I think the Chargers win easily behind LT. Chargers 31, Raiders 23.

Here's what I see happening... it's a close game. LT has rushed for about 170, but Randy Moss has been his equal. Oakland gets the ball down 5 with 1:30 to go. Collins drives them down field and throws a last minute TD to Moss to pull out a victory.
Oakland 37 San Diego 35

SEATTLE -9.5 over Houston
Here's what I wrote after the Seahawks beat Arizona in Week 3:
"The Seahawks did what they should do if they want to win the division - handily beat a mediocre team at home. With the well-balanced offense clicking, the receivers' dropping woes seemingly a thing of the past, and an improving young defense, it will be interesting to see how they handle the upcoming two big road games at Washington and St. Louis."

Well, they went 1-1 on the road there, and were about 6 inches from 2-0. I like what I see. Although this has the makings of a "trap game", I just don't see it happening as bad as Houston is. Seattle 34, Houston 13.

I would so totally do David Carr. Well, not really. Seattle has a big game at home somewhere in their future. I think this is the week.
Seattle wins easily: Seattle 31 Pretty Boy 12.

St. Louis +13.5 over INDY
Mike Martz won't be there due to health issues with an infection in his heart. Which means the Rams probably won't make any bone-headed moves to totally blow this game. Two touchdowns is a hell of a lot to give a team with an offense as explosive as the Rams. We're about to find out just how "for real" the Colts defense is. Colts 31, Rams 28.

St. Ides has it right. I see Indy winning but by a lot less than 13.5. They've been super hot lately and I think this week is their let down.
Indy 27 St.Louis 24

Game Day blog 10/9/05

Holy fucknuts! What we witnessed today was nothing short of miraculous. Let me type this once, just so I can savor it… Packers 52 - Saints 3. Christ almighty. I don’t think we could have seen a better performance.


The Packers came out flat, and on the first series fumbled twice. Each time they recovered and effectively were fortunate to go three and out. Meanwhile, the Saints came to play. After converting a third and 16 screen and nearly converting a third and 11 screen, New Orleans kicked a field goal and the Packers were once again playing catch-up. (Stat of the season: prior to this game the Packers have held a lead for exactly 6 minutes).

I wondered if this was going to be a long afternoon. I remembered Karen’s prediction and kept the faith, and then as if struck by a thunderbolt, the Packers came to life. Their next four possessions they scored a touchdown, while the defense caused fits for Aaron Brooks. Suddenly it was the Packers capitalizing on turnovers, with Al Harris returning an interception for a TD. Suddenly it was the Packers running the ball, with Najeh Davenport breaking a 24 yard burst and rumbling home with two touchdowns. Suddenly it was the Packers’ Robert Ferguson pulling down receptions and stealing the ball from defenders, and suddenly it was 35 – 3 at halftime.

When the second half started, there was no doubt that Green Bay would win. The question became just how much they would score. Favre stayed in the game for the third quarter and scored another TD on a pass to recently signed Donald Lee. Ryan Longwell (who drives a gorgeous Cadillac) kicked a field goal, and on the defensive play of the game Nick Barnett returned an interception 95 yards for a TD. Final tally: 52 to 3.

Outstanding.

There was one sad moment, however. Early in the second quarter Najeh Davenport went down with a serious ankle injury. I have found out that Davenport has a broken leg and is done for the season. What’s sad is that as readers of SBS know Najeh Davenport is Karen’s favorite player. When we met, Karen didn’t know much or care about football, but she knew that learning the game would be important to me. So one of the things she did was pick a favorite player. She didn’t want to pick Favre because every body picked Favre so she did a little research and picked rookie Najeh Davenport. With Davenport unsigned for next season and a history of being injury proned that dates back to college it is quite possible that today was Najeh’s last game as a Packer. I guess I’m glad that Karen got to witness it, but I'm really sad for her too. Karen got to meet a lot of players this weekend. Maybe she'll find another favorite...

Happy Anniversary from Green Bay

Here we are in Green Bay, Sunday morning 7:45 local time and I can’t sleep any more. Game time is 12:00 noon. The tailgate party at Brett Favre’s Steak House begins at 9:00. Do I need to say more?

Of course I do....

Karen and I arrived in Green Bay Friday morning, checked into the hotel and immediately headed over to Lambeau Field. A quick aside to set the perspective: Tuesday October 12th is our third wedding anniversary and this is our anniversary trip. Since tradition dictates couples purchase leather for the third anniversary I bought Karen a warm leather jacket for Green Bay. Karen bought me an official NFL game ball. So off we went to Lambeau field, Karen dressed in her new leather jacket and my game ball tucked in her backpack, in search of Packers to sign the ball.

Green Bay is notorious for cold weather, but our southern acclimated bodies were not prepared for 40 degree temperatures and wind chills in the 30’s so we headed into Lambeau for some Packer history.

The first stop: The Packers Hall of Fame. Picture a room shaped like a football with display cases on either side and a divider down the middle. Each display case marks a decade starting from 1919 when the Indian Packing Company sponsored Curly Lambeaus fledgling football team and ending with today’s Packers. We made it as far as the 1950’s before we had to catch our tour of the stadium.

I’ve done a lot of cool shit in my life, but the stadium tour pretty much topped them all. It’s not just because I learned some cool stuff, or got to sit in the luxury boxes, or got to see the inner workings of the stadium, no. My wife and I got to walk through the tunnel and out to the field. Yes, that tunnel, and we’ve got the pictures to prove it. I swear to Christ it gave me goose bumps. Oh, and we also saw punter B.J. Sander giving an interview to a local news bimbo. Sander was hitting on her pretty hard and my guess would be that they would hook up.

After the tour we had lunch at Curly’s Pub which overlooks the parking lot. Karen noticed some people standing by a fenced off gate and quickly surmised that this was where the Packers would be driving out. In other words, this was the spot for autographs.

We headed over to the fence and within five minutes I was way too cold to stay. However Karen, all 105 lbs of her insisted that she wanted to stay and try to get autographs for my ball. And we stayed, and she did. Her first was V.P. John Jones, followed by fullback Vontay Leach and linebacker Robert Thomas. Karen was thrilled. Later she scored Defensive Tackles coach Robert Nunn and Director of Player Personnel Reggie McKenzie (I was really happy about that one. Reggie is old school)

Karen found out that she could get more autographs on Saturday so we called it a day and went back to our hotel. We had a nice dinner at the Titletown Brewing Company, a brewpub located in an old rail station, and were asleep in bed by 9:00.
Saturday we woke and headed to the field at 10. Karen positioned herself at the fence (temperatures in the mid 40s and overcast) and I got on line for the book signing.

Oh yeah, I forgot. Karen found out that the Favre family would be signing copies of the book “Favre” written by Brett and Bonita (Brett’s mom) Favre. The signing was to begin at noon so there were only about 5 people ahead of me. The celebrity signers would include Bonita Favre, Scott Favre (Brett’s brother) and Deanna Favre who is Brett’s wife and the plan was you’d get one signature and it was pot luck. I sincerely hoped I didn’t get Scott but what the hell, $5.00 for each book sold went to their charity so who cares? It was all for a good cause. Meanwhile Karen come running in with the football. She had just scored Offensive Line coach Larry Beightol and had several players tell her they’d sign the ball when they were done with their walk through. She bought me a cup of coffee and while I waited inside the warm atrium my little trooper headed back to the front line to face the elements.

I’m running out of time here so let me get right to the good part. Karen filled the ball with signature upon signature, scoring too many Packers to name. Her coup-de-gras was Aaron Rogers who signed our ball and left everyone else standing there empty handed. It pays to have a little adorable wife who I might add would do anything for me. I'm really that lucky. Meanwhile, I got to meet Bonita, Deanna, and Scott. All three signed my book. It was so worth the wait…

Well, it’s now 8:30 local time. Karen’s up and it’s time to get ready to go to the game. She doesn’t know yet, but her man Davenport is starting. So is Roy Manning, the Michigan Wolverine the Packers picked up as an undrafted free agent. And Brett Favre is going to start as well. I’d say the karma is looking good for the Packers.

The Picks you've been clamoring for

Note: Karen and I tried really hard to get these done yesterday. We started this on the flight from Cincinatti to Green Bay and got halfway done. When we got to out hotel last night (9:00 local time) after a Packer day I will never forget, we both promptly fell asleep. So, I will save my partner the trouble and post my picks in a seperate blog.

Greetings SBS fans! Karen and I are currently sitting at about 35,000 feet, above what appears to be farm land. We are in route to Green Bay to watch the Packers play the Saints. This will be the first of several blogs from the road, so let’s get right to the picks.

Last Week -
Samichlaus: 6-7
St. Ides: 4-9

Season -
Samichlaus: 29-30
St. Ides: 22-37




Ravens +1.5 over LIONS

First of all, the Lions aren’t very good. Second of all, they’re still talking about the “bad” call. Third of all, Joey Harrington is still their QB. I like the Ravens in this game. Ravens 17, Lions 7.

Bears +3.5 over BROWNS
Let me be the first to say, or to sing: “the Bears still suck”. Dilfer is a better QB than people give him credit for. In fact, Seattle has still not recovered from losing him. Cleveland wins, 19 to 10.

BILLS -2.5 over Dolphins

I like the Bills as well. The weather is getting colder (it’s 38 in Green Bay as we speak) and Miami is on the road. I think Nick Saban’s luck runs out. Bill 24, Miami 13.

Pats +3.5 over FALCONS

There’s no way that the Patriots lose this week. Last week’s embarrassment is motivation enough for the Patriots to trounce Vick’s herpes infested penis. (Okay sports fans. This is Mrs. Samichlaus here. Since we ARE 35,000 feet in the air and Steve, with his big man-hands, can’t type worth a crap on these tiny this little lap top keys, I’m playing secretary. Can I tell you how odd it is on a plane full of people to have my husband lean over and whisper the words “Vick’s herpes infested penis” into my ear as I’m popping peanuts? I wouldn’t even think to make this stuff up. I now return you to your regular Samichlaus programming…) Patriots 31, Falcons 24.

PACKERS -3.5 over Saints

Since Mrs. Samichlaus is doing such a fine job taking dictation, I’m going to let her do this next prediction. Take it away Mrs. Samichlaus!

Just 3 sentences ago I was repeatedly typing “Vick’s herpes infested penis” and now my husband is asking me to type the word “DICtation” and “preDICtion” expecting me not to laugh at all the damn scrotum connotations.

That said, I have a different way of looking at the games. I chose on how my luck is running or a specific tight end’s tight end that I can’t get out of my head. (Sorry hum, let’s just call that poetic license.) This morning flight took off at 6:30 AM. We had to run to catch the plane and jump it as they were closing the doors. Our connecting flight had us, again, as the last passengers boarding. So my thoughts are: Packers are gonna pull this one through. But only at the last possible moment and only after handing out collective heart attacks from the adrenalin rush.
Packers 24, Saints 21.

RAMS -3.5 over Seahawks

Bubba Franks’ ass. I didn’t need to think about that. I’m taking Seattle to win this game. Although Seattle got out-coached last week, I think that St. Louis’s head coach is even more over-rated than Mike Holmgren. Seattle comes back and wins a big one on the road. Seattle 34, St. Louise 31.

Bucs -3.5 over JETS

I don’t what the odds makers are thinking on this game. Seriously. The Jets may get shut out, but we’re not going to write that here on the odd chance that my cousin still reads this blog/. The Jets don’t have a prayer against the Bucs. Tampa 17, Jets 3.

Titans +3.5 over TEXANS

This one qualifies as the Samichlaus Stinker of the week, but I’m going to buck conventional SBS wisdom. I like Papa St. Ides’s approach: take the home dog. Why? These are two bad teams, period. I think the home dog rule will trump the ineptitude of David Carr and company. Texans win 24 - 17

NINERS +14.5 over Colts

Cool! We were just having a discussion about point spreads and the ubiquitous “half point”! The things married couples talk about as their 3rd anniversary approaches…. Anyway, I’m going with the Colts and the points. The Colts broke out of their offensive funk last week, and their defense is the real thing. The only thing that could trip them up is overconfidence (historians: check out the Packers / Colts game from 1997 that defined overconfidence). I’m predicting the Colts win this one college style.

Colts 41 Niners 17

CARDINALS +3.5 over Panthers

My though is that the Cardinals have had the dribbling shits most of the week. Mexico can do that to you (as opposed to RON Mexico, which gives you the “blistering penis”). I really like the Cats, and I really like John Fox. I also think Denny Green is overrated along with his Cardinals. My apologies to Papa St. Ides, but I’m contradicting everything I said before… Panthers 27 Cardinals 13

Eagles -3.5 over COWBOYS

Well, I don’t know about this one. I think the Eagles are still the cream of the crap that is the NFC. When the hell did that happen anyway? It was just a few years ago that the NFC was the dominant division… oh well, welcome to parity. Do I dare go against another home dog? Crap. I don’t know. OK, yep. Eagles 34 Cowboys 20

Redskins +6.5 over BRONCOS

The Skins are confident and the Broncos aren’t all that good. Still, 6 .5 is a lot to cover. Plus, the Skins aren’t blowing any one out. OK, take the Skins and the points and don’t be too surprised if they squeak by with a win. Broncos 21 Redskins 20

Bengals +2.5 over JAGUARS

Boomer Esiason called Carson Palmer the best young quarterback in the NFL. Palmer has done nothing to contradict that statement. However… the test of a good young team is to win on the road and I don’t think the Bengals are ready yet. I hope they prove me wrong, I’m actually starting to become a fan. Jaguars 27 Bengals 24

CHARGERS -3.5 over Steelers

This is a tough Monday night game. Pittsburgh is the better team. Is Rothlesb… uhh, Big Ben a better QB than Drew Brees? (Note to SBS fans: I have no clue how to spell his last name and I don’t care to look it up. You think the kid could sell a few letters to Ed Ott). I know a Steelers fan here in Richmond, a large African American dude, who is actually starting to make me believe the Steeler hype. Of course, that could be because he could easily rip the doors off my Camry and eat the upholstery if he chose to do so. OK I’m going with the Steelers. Steelers 27 Bolts 21

Week 5 Picks

Fun sports night on Wednesday night. Rangers won, Red Sox lost. Yankees lost too, but that's okay, I'm not a Yankees fan anyways. :P DirectTV is showing its "Center Ice" NHL package free for the first week, so I got to flip around between a ton of games. I'll hold my initial reactions on the "new" NHL until a few more games, but I like what I see so far.

Note: Samichlaus is currently en route to Green Bay for this weekend's Packers game! So I'll post his picks when he gets them to me.

On to this week's football picks.. After just 4 weeks, I'm 15 games below .500, yikes. That'll be a tough hole to climb out of.

Last Week -
Samichlaus: 6-7
St. Ides: 4-9

Season -
Samichlaus: 29-30
St. Ides: 22-37

Ravens +1.5 over LIONS
Gut-wrenching controversial loss for the Lions last week. There are still tons of people saying that winning touchdown catch should not have been reversed after the replay. There are also reports that the young Lions receivers have pretty much quit on Harrington, and it's on the verge of an open mutiny. Oh, and WR Charles Rogers is suspended for drugs. Maybe he's running those routes sloppily because he's stoned, and not because he's protesting Harrington's poor play? Who knows. Ravens 20, Lions 13.

Bears +3.5 over BROWNS
The Browns have kept it close in their losses, and Trent Dilfer has looked like a solid starting QB. But the Bears defense ought to make things a lot more difficult for him. Bears 19, Browns 17.

BILLS -2.5 over Dolphins
I'm torn on this one. Basically, the Dolphins have been over-achieving and the Bills have been under-achieving. I was going to go with the Dolphins, until I heard that J.P. Losman has been benched in favor of Kelly Holcombe. Holcombe comes from the Browns, where he played well enough to force Tim Couch out. Hell, is Couch even in the league right now? Anyways, I like that Holcombe brings in some veteran experience, and I think the team respondes. Bills 23, Dolphins 17.

Pats +3.5 over FALCONS
Weird season for the Patriots. They're again decimated by injuries, yet they held it together enough to win in Pittsburgh two weeks ago. But the Chargers trounced them at home last week. I think their defense is really hurting right now, and Chad Brown isn't getting any younger. It really comes down to Brady winning games for them now. Although I'm tempted to take the Falcons, Vick will be a little gimpy, and this could be a big letdown game for them at home. Even if they do win, Pats should keep it close enough to cover. Patriots 27, Falcons 24.

PACKERS -3.5 over Saints
Did the Packers wake up in their near comeback last Monday night? Frankly, I'm sick of all the Favre retirement talk. But basically, they need to win some games, and what better time than against the ever-erratic Saints with Mr. and Mrs. Samichlaus in attendance? Packers 26, Saints 20.

RAMS -3.5 over Seahawks
Reverse psychology time! Both starting WRs for Seattle are likely out (Jackson and Engram). The Seattle defense could not get key stops on 3rd down last week. Following that heart-breaking loss, it'll be tough to win on the road with their key receivers missing, against a Rams team that beat them 3 times last season (including that playoff game in Seattle where Engram dropped the tying TD). Really, this game will come down to turnovers and which defense steps up. And as much as I'd like to say Seattle wins this game, really, this is the type of game I've watched them lose time and time again for over 20 years. Rams 37, Seahawks 31.

Bucs -3.5 over JETS
*RING RING* "Hello, Vinny? This is Herm Edwards. We know you were on your couch just two weeks ago sipping whiskey sours and eating potato chips watching the football games, but we need you. Think you can suit up and beat an undefeated Tampa Bay team that's playing excellent ball right now? No? Well, you can't be any worse than this Brooks Bollinger clown I somehow managed to keep on the roster. I'll see you tomorrow." Buccaneers 23, Jets 10.

Titans +3.5 over TEXANS
The Titans beat the Ravens and kept it close against the Rams. Which means that they can hang with bad teams. The Texans are a bad team. Titans 26, Texans 24.

NINERS +14.5 over Colts
Of course, the first week I don't take the Colts giving huge points, they cover. This week they're giving huge points again in San Fran. I'm really very tempted to take them. But that extra little half point putting the spread over 2 TDs is preventing me from doing it. They win by 14, due to a late garbage TD by the Niners. Colts 31, Niners 17.

CARDINALS +3.5 over Panthers
Did the trip to Mexico wake up the Cardinals? I couldn't force myself to watch the second half (and there was no fecal snow* in the forecast.. ), but apparently McNown actually got the offense going. As much as I don't want to see Arizona get on track, I think they do have decent talent on both sides of the ball, and if McNown can get some time to throw, they can win some games. Panthers almost let a pretty bad Packers team steal that win. Taking the home team with points. Cardinals 24, Panthers 23.

Eagles -3.5 over COWBOYS
McNabb and TO are tearing teams a part. The Eagles aren't even pretending to establish a running game and still throwing at will against opponents. The Cowboys just are not that good, and a tough defense like Philly will give Drew Bledsoe fits. Eagles 31, Cowboys 17.

Redskins +6.5 over BRONCOS
The Redskins should have lost last week, and should have only put up about 10 points. However, Mark Brunell does look comfortable back there and has found a rhythm. And the Redkins defense is pretty good, despite the Seattle offense moving the ball pretty well on them. The Broncos offense is nowhere near as good as Seattle's. Jake Plummer is way overdue for a bad game. No way the Broncos cover almost a touchdown, even if they do squeeze out a win. Wouldn't it be ironic if the Redskins rookie kicker cost them this game after winning it last week? Broncos 17, Redskins 14.

Bengals +2.5 over JAGUARS
I've stuck with the Jaguars too long after watching them beat Seattle in week 1, and keeping it close with Indy in week 2. Two weeks ago, they needed OT to beat the Jets. Last week, they did nothing offensively at home against a Denver defense that isn't exactly scary. This week, the Bengals continue to show the world they're not a fluke. Bengals 31, Jaguars 24.

CHARGERS -3.5 over Steelers
It took a couple weeks, but the Chargers offense is clicking on all cylinders right now. And Big Ben is making my Trent Dilfer comparisons look pretty bad so far this season. Although Trent Dilfer is making himself look better. If that makes sense. Anyways, LT runs wild again. Chargers 30, Steelers 24.

* Fecal snow... I mentioned this in last week's picks, and I guess it deserves some explanation. Back in college, one of my friends was taking some kind of social studies or socialogy or something class. Anyways, they were learning about Mexico, and the teacher explained the fecal snow phenomenon. From what I remember, basically, in the villages, piles of shit pile up, dry out in the sun, and then the flakes of dried poop blow around, creating a sort of "snow". Let's see what Google pulls up... Here we go, several articles talking about problems arising from overpopulation: "In Mexico City, there is a phenomenon known as "fecal snow" which occurs when the wind picks up the dried excrement lying about and rains it upon the city." This wacky weather condition also inspired a BDF song of the same name (which showed up on the first page of the Google Search). Maybe I'll share the lyrics someday...

The Return of Hockey!

So far, my baseball predictions look good. :P And in a 5-game series, winning game 1 is huge. The losers in game 1 will have to take 3 of 4 to win the series. It's a bit ridiculous tonight's Yankees-Angels game doesn't start until 10:15pm EST. I don't think I can bring myself to stay up til 1:30am on a work night, even for playoff baseball...

But before that game, we get the return of hockey! Here's a few things to keep an eye on. And yes, I am excited about it…

New Rules!
They added some new rules to try and increase the offense, and make the game more exciting for fans to watch. Here's a few key ones:
* The offensive zone is bigger. Should result in more effective power plays and less offsides penalties.
* Goalies cannot go behind the net to play the puck. So the dump in from the blue line should be a more effective way of getting into the offensive zone.
* No two-line passes. Get ready for some serious goal hanging and a ton of breakaways.
* Stricter enforcement of holding, grabbing, and stick penalties. If they want more wide open play, they'll need to stop players from grabbing one another without the puck.
* And last, but not least.. Shootouts! I've been hoping for this for years, and they've finally done it. No more ties. At the end of regulation, they'll play the usual overtime period. If the game is still tied, it's shootout time! One on one. Skater versus the goalie. Should be fun to watch.

New Network(??)
Apparently ESPN and FOX didn't want to touch hockey with a 50-foot pole for a television contract. So the NHL went elsewhere. The winner? OLN. "What the flying fuck is OLN?" you might ask? Outdoors Living Network, or some shit like that. The "O" is for Outdoors. Even though professional hockey is not played outdoors. Apparently this network's claim to fame is televising the Tour De France. Yikes. Still, it looks like they got veteran announcers hockey fans will be familiar with, so the broadcasts should be just fine. As long as you can figure out what channel it is on your cable or satellite provider…

New Superstar
Sidney Crosby, an 18-year old kid drafted #1 overall by the Pittsburgh Penguins, is expected to be the next big NHL superstar. With Mario Lemeiux at his side and a decent supporting cast in Pittsburgh, he ought to have a good chance to put up nice numbers in his rookie campaign. Here's hoping he does better than previous "next Gretzky", Eric Lindros (who is back playing in his hometown Toronto, by the way).

Same Old Rangers
Well, the Rangers have Jaromir Jagr… and uhhhhh…. Prospects? Seems the Rangers are finally admitting they are rebuilding, but probably couldn't have picked a worse time, when fan interest is already hurting due to the long layoff. Gone are Messier, Leetch, and Richter. The Cup winning 1994 team is a faded memory. Hell, this team hasn't even made the playoffs in like 5 years. Basically, all Ranger fans can hope for is that some of their young players show some growth and promise, and that the team drafts well the next few seasons. And maybe we can sell off Jagr for decent return value if he puts up big numbers and a playoff contender shows interest.

With the baseball playoffs in full swing now, and the NFL just starting to heat up, there probably won't be a lot of interest in the NHL. But wait until February.. When baseball is long gone and football is over. That's when the Winter Olympics step in, and the NHL has agreed to take a few weeks off from the season to allow the pros to play for their countries. If we get a good competitive display from Olympic hockey (and we almost always do), when the NHL picks back up, it could renew fan interest. Hell, there will be nothing else to watch anyways.

I just hope the Rangers aren't mathematically eliminated from the playoffs by February.

I'm still a little pissed they allowed last season to be totally cancelled. But I am happy it is back.

Playoff Baseball

Okay, with playoff baseball starting today (including games at 1pm and 4pm! Get your Alt-Tab fingers ready!), let's take a quick break from football talk and see what's up. So let's answer some top questions…

Can the Red Sox and Yankees actually advance past the first round? As exciting as it might be to see another Boston vs. New York ALCS, I don't see it happening. The pitching for both teams is just too shaky for a 5-game series. I'll address this a bit more further down.

Will Atlanta continue their decade long pattern of making the playoffs, but going out with a fizzle?
What the hell is wrong with the Braves? They ALWAYS win their division. And ALWAYS lose. Okay, so they've won one World Series over this current one, so not really _always_, but close enough. Says here the pattern continues. And unless someone else besides Andruw Jones decides to get hot with the bat, they might not even put up much of a fight in the first round.

Can the Cardinals live up to their expectations, especially after being swept in the World Series last yeat?
I doubt it. Although the rest of the NL isn't exactly scary. They're arguably worse than last year, with no Scott Rolen, Larry Walker needing cortizone shots into his frickin spine to be able to play, and their starting pitching besides Cy Young candidate Chris Carpenter not exactly intimidating.

Okay, so who's going to win what?
It's been said time and time and time again that pitching wins championships. Can you think of a recent an example where the offense won the World Series for a team in a high scoring series? Me neither. Good pitching wins. Based upon that logic (and it's hard to argue with it), a lot of "experts" are picking the Astros to win it all. The Astros?!? You mean the team that barely won the wild card?!? Yes, those Astros. And here's three reasons why: Clemens, Pettite, and Oswalt. I don't think you'll find a better top 3 starters in the playoffs. The Astros probably would have challenged for the division had Oswalt and Pettitte both been on the DL for a decent amount of time. And Clemens got like NO run support for many of his starts.

We all know how much I hate the "experts". So I'm going to say while the Astros pitching is impressive, their offense is not. It's tough to see them putting up even the 3-4 runs needed to win playoff games against other teams' top pitchers.

As for the AL… we all know about the woes of the Red Sox and Yankees pitching. But here's the key difference - Randy Johnson has pitched well in September (including a HUGE win against the Sox last weekend, when the home plate umpire was giving him a real tough time on close pitches). Curt Schilling has not pitched well, and is still of questionable health. Hell, it looks like he's not even going to pitch until Game 4 (if it gets that far). What does that tell you about the team's faith in him?

Despite their pitching woes, they're not exactly going up against amazing pitching staffs with the Angels and White Sox. Basically, it'll be the Yankees and Red Sox high-powered offenses against pretty good pitching of the Angels and White Sox. Versus the pretty good offenses of the Angels and White Sox against the not-quite-as-good pitching of New York and Boston. Confused yet? Me too.

I'll just shut up now and pull some actual predictions out of my ass:

ALDS:
White Sox over Red Sox in 4. (With Schilling getting destroyed at home to lose the series).
Yankees over Angels in 5. (Dude! A-Rod! Time to him to earn some of that salary in the post-season.)

NLDS:
Astros over Braves in 4. (Could Pettitte win both games 1 and 4? Why not.)
Cardinals over Padres in 5. (Just because the Cardinals like to give themselves a scare.)

And what the hell, I'll go all the way. Though I deserve the right to revise the rest of these predictions after round 1 is over:

ALCS:
Yankees over White Sox in 6. (Ozzie Guillen just is not a championship caliber coach, and it catches up with him.)

NLCS:
Cardinals over Astros in 7. (The makings of a classic series. Houston offense doesn't get it done.)

World Series:
Cardinals over Yankees in 6. (Cardinals put it all together for the win. Series MVP: Albert Pujols. The kid is dope.)

We'll revisit this later, no doubt. ;) And Samichlaus has promised a piece, including some good ol' fashioned Yankee bashing, so stay tuned!