Week 16... if this were a better season we'd have been waiting for this one!

Merry Christmas from the Samichlaus household here in the southernmost region of the North Pole. It was a spectacular Christmas, as we were able to keep our respective families at a safe distance and share a quiet holiday with each other. I did manage to watch some of the Bolts beat down of the Titans, and I will say that I would have taken the Chargers to win. We’ll see if St. Ides feels a little Christmas spirit and gives me credit for the post apocalyptic pick.

Of course I'm feeling the Christmas spirit! I think we've been late on most of our Thursday picks, but considering we're admitting defeat (yes, I took the Titans this week) means we're being honest, right?

So going into last week in my money pool, I had a 2-game lead. I went an abysmall 2-3. However, one of the guys right behind me went 1-4, and the other went 0-5. It was a rough week, nobody out of 70+ people went 5-0. So here we are entering the final 2 weeks of the season, and I have a 3-game lead. My "magic number" to clinch first is 8. (I'm sure our highly intelligent readers know what that means, but just in case we get a random sport newb stopping by, it means if I get a combined total of my wins + my closest competition's losses of 8 or more, I win.) Basically, if I can go 3-2 both weeks, they'd have to go 9-1 just to tie me. It SEEMS like a pretty good cushion, but I still have to pick the winners. The pressure is on. $5k on the line. Wish me luck.

This week features a matchup made for SBS: The Seahawks come to Green Bay to play the Packers. Had the Seahawks played a bit better this season, this game would have been special. SBS would have been the place to be this Sunday. We would have featured live gameday blogs, along with analysis and commentary throughout the week. All the things that you'd expect from a first rate sports blog.

Which of course we are not...

Meanwhile, here’s how the rest of your games are going to shake out…

Baltimore (8-6) at Pittsburgh (7-7) -2.5
Pittsburgh had a huge win against Green Bay. They played well and won fair and square. I warned Mrs. Samichlaus that every call in the game would go the Steelers way, but it was simply not the case. The last play of the game was something, and as much as the Green Bay press wants to get on journeyman dime back Josh Bell for not getting under the receiver, Ben Roethlisberger made a hell of a throw from 20 yards out. (btw, Roethlisberger is now a spell check aware word in Office 2007…. Kudos to Microsoft!). With that said, I’m going with Baltimore in this game. I think the Ravens D is better than the Packers D (especially since Al Harris is out) and I think the Ravens won’t let up: they are mentally tougher than the Packers and will prove it this week. Ravens 30 Steelers 27

I couldn't believe the Stealers pulled that one out last week. But the Packers did give me the gift of getting that 2-point conversion in the end and barely covering. Meanwhile the Ravens have quietly put together a nice little run and are in pretty good shape for the playoffs. I think they turn up the heat on Ben and he goes from throwing for 500 yards to throwing for around 200. I think I'm making this one of my money picks this week. Joe Flacco don 't let me down! Ravens 27, Stealers 17.

Carolina (6-8) at NY Giants (8-6) -7.5
The Cats are playing for pride, and the Giants are playing for a playoff spot. I’m not sure about the spread, but I’m going with the Giants. They can still dominate at times, and I think this is the time. Giants 34 Panthers 23

You would think that's how it should play out, right? But the Vikings had a lot on the line last week and the Panthers handled them. When are DBs in this league going to learn? Don't talk smack to Steve Smith. I don't quite understand why he doesn't play at that level every game when he's clearly capable of it, but once someone talks shit to him, he goes on a mission to single-handedly embarass them. Let's hope the Giants don't make that mistake. Giants 30, Panthers 20.

Seattle (5-9) at Green Bay (9-5) -14.5
Wowsers. That is a lot of points. Seattle has looked bad and is moving in the wrong direction. They are spiraling out of control. Matt Hasselbeck, coming off a five turnover outing, can’t throw the deep ball and is nursing a bad shoulder. The receivers are not doing well either: first off they overpaid for Houshmandzadeh (not a spell check aware name) who is pedestrian at best. Second, Nate Burleson is out, making Deion Branch their number two. Branch has not been the same since blowing out his knee against Green Bay in ’08. Bottom line is the Packers D should give them fits. Meanwhile, Mike McCarthy was quoted on Thursday as saying the Packers have practiced better than they have all year this week. Practice well, play well. Packers win and cover. Packers 36 Seahawks 10

Yes, Seattle has sucked. But Houshmandzadeh has been a little better than pedestrian. He's 6th in the NFC in receptions and has had some huge third down catches. There have also been big plays where he clearly draws the safety, which has left Burleson or TE John Carlson wide open. Did Seattle overpay for him? Probably. But let's give him a full year with a healthy Hasselbeck before declaring him a bust. I was tempted to take the Packers as a money pick, but I don't think I could deal with the emotional turmoil if the Seahawks somehow pulled off a win in this game and at the same time cost me 5 grand... Packers 31, Seahawks 13.

Tampa Bay (2-12) at New Orleans (13-1) -14.5
Well. The Bucs pulled off the SBS sweep this year by whupping both the Packers and the Seahawks. Good for them. I hope they all get the runs from eating a bad batch of Cuban sandwiches from Ybor City. Fucks. New Orleans should win with ease: Saints 37 Bucs 13

You'd think by this late in the season we'd see fewer huge point spreads. Nope. There's clearly a top tier and rock bottom tier this season, and they're often playing one another. The Saints screwed me on Thursday night last week, and let's not forget that botched game when they fumbled with under 2 minutes to go. They haven't been covering much lately. I'll take those points. Saints 31, Bucs 20.

Buffalo (5-9) at Atlanta (7-7) -9.5
There’s been a Brian Brohm sighting in Buffalo: Brohm, signed off the Packers practice squad may get the start this week as Ryan Fitzpatrick has not practiced and is listed as questionable. I’m going with Atlanta this week. Although Matt Ryan is also questionable, he has had limited practice. The Bills on the road lose by 10. Falcons 30 Bills 20

Ryan played last week and I imagine he'll tough it out this week. The Bills have been an odd team, and that's a lot of points, but now that I know there's a good chance Brian Brohm will be the QB, it makes more sense that the spread is so high. Falcons 27, Bills 10.

Kansas City (3-11) at Cincinnati (9-5) -13.5
The Bengals need a win to clinch their division. The Chiefs? They can smell that good Kansas City BBQ and the respite of the off season… The Bengals are great at home in December, winning 6 of their last 7. Bengals win and cover: Bengals 34 Chiefs 17

I road the Bengals early on and they gave me several wins. At one point, I think I jumped ship after they lost to the Raiders. And I haven't climbed back on since. The Chiefs are pretty bad and very banged up, but this has "trap game" written all over it, at least in terms of betting. Bengals dominate the game but don't put up tons of points, and a garbage-time TD for the cover from the Chiefs. Bengals 23, Chiefs 10.

Oakland (5-9) at Cleveland (3-11) -3.5
Both teams have shown some life, perhaps Oakland has shown a bit more. But with Mike Holmgren waiting in the wings Browns players and coaches are playing for their jobs. Watch the Browns absolutely trounce the Raiders this week. Browns 27 Raiders 7

I have mixed emotions about Holmgren going to Cleveland. Apparently he wanted back in Seattle, and Seattle made him an offer.. Though for him not to take it, it was probably a shitty offer. I guess we'll see what he's really made of, as the Browns are a frickin mess. Meanwhile, the Raiders would be a half way decent team if they can solve their QB woes. I'm not sure if Jamarcus Russell or Charlie Frye gets the start this week, but it probably doesn't matter much. Browns 19, Raiders 13.

Houston (7-7) at Miami (7-7) -3.5
This should be a great game, but I’ll give the nod to Miami. On a personal note, this game should be a bit paradoxal for my father in law. Although he is a Dolphins fan, he also lives in the shadow of UVA. I wonder how he’ll react to Matt Schaub throwing passes against the Fins? Better hope this one isn’t on local TV… Dolphins 24 Texans 20

I've gone back and forth on this one three times. The Fins had a heart-breaking loss to the Titans last week. The Texans barely beat the Rams. Both teams seem to have the talent to get into the playoffs, it's a matter of who shows up and wants it more and makes fewer mistakes. Schaub hasn't shown me he can deliver under pressure. But neither has Henne (who, by the way, went 0-4 against Ohio State during his career at Michigan). The Texans running game has been fumble prone. The Dolphins running game is Ricky Williams. The defenses seem to be pretty evenly matched. I'm going to say Henne pulls this one out of his ass and gives Miami fans hope that he can truly be their first solid franchise QB since Dan Marino. But they don't cover. Dolphins 27, Texans 26.

Jacksonville (7-7) at New England (9-5) -7.5
Easy pick: Patriots at home fighting for the division title. I like New England by 10. Patriots 30 Jaguars 20

I agree. Though I wouldn't put money on it. Patriots 29, Jaguars 20.

Detroit (2-12) at San Francisco (6-8) -12.5
Honestly. The hardest part about doing picks at the end of the season is forcing myself to think about the Detroit Lions. Yesterday, a Nigerian terrorist attempted to blow up an aircraft in route to Detroit, but according to passengers fumbled with the apparatus he was using to ignite the explosives. After he was tackled by the other passengers and led off the plane, the Lions offered him a contract to play special teams. What? Too soon? Niners 30 Lions 13

Haha, no, not too soon. Lions actually covered last week. Despite Daunte Culpepper seeing extended playing time. Niners are done for the playoff hunt, but they can still finish at .500 by winning their final two. Niners 27, Lions 10.

St. Louis (1-13) at Arizona (9-5) -14.5
Arizona should have an easy win, and no, the 14.5 doesn’t scare me. They win today and coast against Green Bay next week to finish 10-6. Cardinals 33 Rams 17

It scares me a little. The Cardinals seem to play down to their competition. The Rams have kept it close lately against the likes of the Saints and Texans. Arizona doesn't have much to play for. They have the NFC West locked up, would need all kinds of help to sneak into the #2 seed. So they're basically a #3-4 seed with a home playoff game. It might make sense to not put Kurt Warner in harm's way. Cardinals 24, Rams 13.

Denver (8-6) at Philadelphia (10-4) -7.5
Denver on the road against a Philadelphia team that’s poised to win their division. You’ve got to love Philly in this one. I see a two TD win easily. Eagles 37 Denver 23

I hope you're right. I'm making this one of my money picks. I was basically thinking the same thing. Denver really isn't as good as their 8 wins may indicate. I been saying for weeks that McNabb was due to lay an egg, and he hasn't. Which means he is still due. But I'm thinking he'll save it for the playoffs, as their offense is now a bit more balanced and their defense is playing well enough for McNabb to not have to do a lot. Eagles 31, Broncos 20.

NY Jets (7-7) at Indianapolis (14-0) -5.5
I’m really rooting for the Jets this week. Sure the Colts would like to go undefeated, but the Jets are playing for a playoff spot. The question is can they rise to the occasion? Mark Sanchez has a lot stacked against him. He’s playing in a loud dome. He’s been making the same mistakes over and over. He may be hitting the “rookie wall”. Still…. Jets 24 Colts 20

Sanchez hasn't looked good at all lately. The Colts are still playing all coy and shit about whether or not they'll play their starters. They did make a roster move that may be telling - they activated a QB from their practice squad. I'll be keeping a close eye on this one tomorrow to see if the Colts deactivate any key players and my dad is going to be in touch with his Vegas connection to see if the line shifts dramatically as game time approaches. I don't see Sanchez pulling this out in Indy if Peyton Manning and the rest of the starters play even a half. I said it last week, and I'll say it again - the Colts have Patriot envy and will try to go undefeated, despite what they might say. Colts 30, Jets 10.

Dallas (9-5) at Washington (4-10) +6.5
The goddamn Cowboys are going to win this goddamn game because the Redskins are so goddamn pathetic. What’s worse is that the best they can hope for is Mike Shanahan to come to the rescue. Jim Zorn sealed his fate when he tried to run the same trick play twice in a row last week. Ye gods. Cowboys 37 Redskins 13.

I didn't watch that game, but it was the first thing one of my co-workers mentioned to me the next day. I was like "What? You can't be serious. You must be explaining it wrong. Don't they have rules about having 5 down linemen for any play?" I never found the answer to that (I can only imagine that special teams has different rules about this?), but I did see the play on Youtube. Ye gods is right. Meanwhile, Romo and the Cowboys showed me something last week in dismantling the Saints in New Orleans. It doesn't mean they're winning a playoff game, but maybe they're slightly better than I've given them credit for. Cowboys 30, Skins 13.

Minnesota (11-3) at Chicago (5-9) +7.5
So last week Carolina figured out what Packers fans have said all year: pressure Favre and you can beat him. The Bears however, aren’t that bright. Minnesota should trounce them with ease, and Brett has something to prove: after he put the smackdown on coach Brad Childress during the game last week, Brett needs to show he’s still got something left in the tank. Has anyone seen Adrian Peterson lately? Vikings 30 Bears 13

This game isn't meaningless for the Vikings. The Eagles can actually pass them for the #2 seed in the NFC. I'm tempted to take the Bears and the points, but I can't talk myself into it. Nothing has been good for the Bears this season. And Devin Hester appears to be out as well. Remember when Chicago was all excited about getting Jay Cutler? How they feeling about that deal now?

Week 15... the Packers are in the hunt and the Seahawks are the best of the runts.

Ha! I almost blew another week! I’m sitting here looking at a foot of snow on the ground in Richmond wondering how the hell this could have happened. In fact I was getting ready to go outside and restock my bird feeders when I remembered there’s football tonight. St. Ides who of course sent these to me on time, also had this to say on Thursday morning…

FYI I'm taking the Colts on Thursday night. I'm not buying the "Well now that we've clinched the division, we're going to rest our starts" charade. They still have Pats envy and will try to duplicate the undefeated regular season. I think.

I would have taken the Colts as well. 2.5 was way too close for the way they’ve been playing. We’ll call that one a draw.

So yeah, there's snow being dumped on the entire east coast it seems, though it hasn't hit us here in NY as of Saturday night at 7:30pm, but it's coming! I'm going to factor that in to several of my picks this week, going on the premise that it's going to be pretty hard to throw and the teams with better running games and/or defense usually win those ugly weather games. Meanwhile, I'm clinging to a slim 2-game lead in my money pool. Every one of these picks counts now.. I took the Colts on Thursday (win), the Saints tonight, and I'm still debating which 3 games to take tomorrow, but I'm leaning towards the Jets, Bills, and Niners. Anyways, on to the real picks..

Dallas (8-5) at New Orleans (13-0) -7.5
I’m taking the Cowboys tonight, as they are clearly the more desperate team. I don’t see them winning but I do see this as a close game. The more bad that happens to that team the better I feel. Odd, huh? It feels like Christmas! Saints 30 Cowboys 28

The Saints burnt me in that Falcons Monday night game, and I've stayed away from picking them since (and they've failed to cover more often than not since then). But I'm going back to them in the Bayou tonight where a ruckus (translation: bombed) crowd will make things tough on Romo and crew. The over/under on shots of Wade Phillips with a totally confused look on his face is at 8.5. And I'm taking the over. Saints 37, Cowboys 20.

Arizona (8-5) at Detroit (2-11) +11.5
This one won’t be close. I think Culpepper is starting for Detroit. Nuff said… Cardinals 34 Lionesses 10

As soon as the Cards look like they're going to roll into the playoffs going strong, they lay an egg against the Niners and fail to clinch the division. They should be able to take care of business in Detroit. Cardinals 27, Lions 13.

New England (8-5) at Buffalo (5-8) +7.5
Patriots on the road in 2009 makes guys like Anonymous whimper and whine. Bills shock the world… Bills 20 Pats 17

I'm not sure that's a huge shock at this point. I'd like to thank Randy Moss for single-handedly knocking me out of my Fantasy Football playoffs last week by giving up. And yes, he gave up. I will now cheer against the Patriots for the remainder of the season, Tom Brady or not. Fuck you, Randy. Fuck you very much. Bills 13, Patriots 9.

Houston (6-7) at St. Louis (1-12) +10.5
I think I might do a post about the worst team in the NFL, and I think that post might begin and end with St. Louis. After all, the Bucs beat the Packers this year… Houston wins and covers. Houston 30 St. Louis 13

Yeah, the Rams are pretty awful. At least they had the sense to cut that lowlife Incognito. Dirtiest player in the league, and can't go a game without a blatant personal foul. Of course, the Bills snatched him up right away. Anyways, Houston dismantled Seattle last week, so they should have their way with their Rams. But they've been inconsistent enough to make me consider taking all those points at home for a moment. Then I remember the Rams have some guy named Null at QB these days. Yes, Null. As in the Rams' chances. Texans 30, Rams 10.

Miami (7-6) at Tennessee (6-7) -3.5
Dad’s Dolphins have really come together as of late, making a run at the AFC East. Of course, so have the Titans. I’m not sure who’s starting for the Titans, but either way I like the Fish to keep the roll going. Dolphins 24 Titans 20

It'll be unfortunate if the Titans little run here towards the playoffs after an abyssmal start is derailed because Vince Young is hurt and won't play. This is basically an elimination game for them. You're not making the playoffs in the AFC at 8-8, no way. I'm going to stick with the Titans riding Chris Johnson (on pace to break 2000 rushing yards and a home run threat every time he touches the ball). Titans 27, Dolphins 23.

Cleveland (2-11) at Kansas City (3-10) -2.5
Rumor has it that Mike Holmgren is interested in the GM position in Cleveland. If he thought Green Bay was a barren waste land, wait until he gets a load of Cleveland. I imagine he’ll live in Shaker Heights , where there are several nice houses, but for the most part Cleveland resembles a city that someone built and then everyone left. At least Green Bay operates as designed: you either (a) work for the Packers, (b) work for the toilet paper company or (c) work for a chain restaurant. Kansas City 27 Cleveland 20

I think Holmgren REALLY wants the Seattle job, but there's word that the layers of management just below owner Paul Allen might not want his ego back in town. If the Seahawks haven't come knocking already, they may not be. Which means Holmgren may go for the dollar signs rather than a more ideal franchise to join. Anyways, don't look now but I read somewhere this week that Brady Quinn has actually looked decent lately. Decent enough to win in KC? Probably not. Chiefs 20, Browns 17.

San Francisco (6-7) at Philadelphia (9-4) -9.5
I’m taking the Niners and the points. Both teams are playing well and have a lot to play for, but the Niners are the more desperate team. Eagles win a close game: Eagles 30 Niners 27

The Rangers were playing the Flyers in Philly this afternoon, and the place was only like a third full because of the weather. It was weird seeing all those empty seats. It was like watching a Devils home game. (In case you haven't heard or don't follow hockey, the Devils built a brand spanking new arena in the heart of lovely Newark, NJ two years ago. And attendance is so bad they can't give tickets away for free. But I digress...) It'll likely be mostly passed through by the time the game starts. I'm torn between thinking Frank Gore has a huge day and the Niners will struggle with the timezone adjustment and the cold. I'm going to call for a low scoring game and therefore take the points. Eagles 16, Niners 10.

Chicago (5-8) at Baltimore (7-6) -10.5
The Bears are bad. Bad bad bad. Baltimore is better, and they are at home. Plus Baltimore’s D won’t let up like the Packers did last week. I’ll lay those points. Ravens 30 Bears 13

Another game with weather issues. Apparently the Bears didn't leave in time to beat the storm and subsequently had several flights delayed. As of right now, they're still waiting for a plane. Which means a really late arrival tonight. I don't trust the Ravens and that's a lot of points for them to give, but considering the logistics of the Bears travels, I'll have a little more confidence in them. Ravens 27, Bears 14.

Atlanta (6-7) at NY Jets (7-6) -4.5
Mark Sanchez is back and the Jets are still in the hunt. I like their chances against Atlanta who technically are still in the hunt but are on the verge of elimination. I’m not sure who gets the start for the Falcons: Ryan or Redmond, and I don’t want to bother my Indian chick friend on this snowy Saturday. Lets go Jets: Jets 20 Falcons 13

Another snow game! Amazingly, as I write this, the snow has started coming down like crazy. The latest weather report has it lasting until around noon tomorrow, giving us 8-12 inches. Which means the field will probably stil be in pretty bad shape by 1pm kickoff tomorrow. I believe Ryan and Turner are still out for the Falcons. A steady diet of Thomas Jones ought to be an easy cover for the Jets. Don't expect Sanchez to be asked to do much besides handoff and not fumble. Jets 18, Falcons 10.

Cincinnati (9-4) at San Diego (10-3) -6.5
Cincinnati got their asses handed to them by the Vikings last week much to Samichlaus’s dismay. This week won’t be any different. San Diego is a good team defending it’s home turf: Chargers 30 Bengals 20

Yep, I had faith in the Bengals last week, and they let me down. Somehow, Carson Palmer isn't even having a very good year despite the Bengals success. He's 18th i the league in passer rating, behind David Garrard, Joe Flacco, Jason Campbell, and Kyle Orton. Meanwhile Phillip Rivers (3rd in QB rating behind only Brees and Favre, in case you were wondering) and his tall physical receivers (including TE Antonio Gates) have been hot hot hot. I'm sticking with the Chargers too. Chargers 31, Bengals 23.

Oakland (4-9) at Denver (8-5) -13.5
I’m happy the Raiders have won 4 games. I don’t hate the Raiders or their fans. They were good to Brett that game after his Pop passed away. However they are not going to win more than 4 now that Grabowski is done for the season. Denver at home is a pretty sure thing even laying two TDs: Denver 37 Raiders 13

Who's starting for the Raiders at QB? Two words: Charlie Frye. Two more words: No chance. Broncos 31, Raiders 13.

Green Bay (9-4) at Pittsburgh (6-7) -1.5
This game went from a pickem’ to the Stealers laying 1.5. Hmmm… My head tells me pick Pittsburgh but my heart says the Packers will win. Tell you what, with Ms. Clairol likely done for the season I’ll take the Packers. They won’t be able to run the ball but who cares? Rodgers will throw all day against the Stealers secondary. Of course, Mike McCarthy could be hell bent on running. In which case you’ll see a lot of Grant off left tackle, Grant off right tackle, take a shot downfield, punt. Hmmm… nahh, McCarthy isn’t that stupid… is he? Packers 24 Stealers 20

You're absolutely right. The Stealers defense looks horrible without Polamalu. Awful. Have I mentioned how awesome Charles Woodson has looked? Incredible. And since I still have the QB Rating numbers up, Aaron Rodgers is 4th in the league right now. Not bad. It worries me slightly that the game is in Pitt and that field has traditionally been an absolute disaster in bad weather. But I'll stick with Green Bay. Packers 23, Stealers 16.

Tampa Bay (1-12) at Seattle (5-8) -6.5
Alrighty then. Here’s Seattle’s chance to give my partner in crime a little Christmas cheer, and not the kind that comes fermented in a bottle. Seattle has to beat Tampa, right? Seriously. Seattle 37 Tampa 13

God, I hope so. They looked pretty bad on both sides of the ball last week in Houston. Josh Freeman got off to a decent start once Tampa Bay put him in at QB. But then he started truly got into the holiday spirit and started giving away interceptions like fruit cake. Merry Christmas! Seriously. 8 picks in his last two games. That's Delhomme-esque. That leads me to believe he's staring down his targets. Hopefully Seattle can make him pay. Seahawks 27, Bucs 10.

Minnesota (11-2) at Carolina (5-8) +8.5
The Cats getting 8.5 at home has me salivating. I don’t think they can beat the Vicodins who all kidding aside are a good team. But if the Cats can get an early lead and maybe force Brett to make one or two bad throws I think this game is close. Let say Vikings 27 Panthers 24

I really dislike the Vikings. If I had to rank my most hated teams it'd go like this: 1) Stealers, 2) Cowboys, 3) Vikings, 4) Rams, 5) Niners. Kind of strange to not have divisional rivals higher, but the Niners and Rams have sucked a lot recently, so a bit of pity dillutes the hatred. I think they cover. Vikings 29, Panthers 20.

NY Giants (7-6) at Washington (4-9) +3.5
Once left for dead the Giants are right back in the mix, while the Redskins are simply playing out the season awaiting the end of the Jim Zorn experiment. In this case the Giants are the more desperate team, and I think they’ll win with ease. Giants 30 Redskins 13

The Giants are playing for their playoff lives. The Skins have been more competivie lately. That point total seems a bit low. Which means Vegas is begging people to take the Giants. I'm not falling for it. Giants 27, Skins 26.

An apology to our reader

Well, I wish I could make an excuse for not posting picks this week. Something creative like "My pet chicken ate my research" or "I was busy working on my time machine, and I lost track of what day it was". But neither of these are accurate. The truth is I intended to do my picks on Saturday, and I plum forgot. By the time I remembered (this morning) I figured it was too late and besides, I haven't taken a bye week. So let's call week 14 a bye and to make it up to you all I will write a little bit about some of today's games and some of last weeks exciting sports events.

Let me first start by saying I did not have sex with Tiger Woods. In fact I've never met the dude. Whatever they wrote about me on TMZ is catagorically false and I hereby deny it. However several years ago Tiger, St. Ides and some guy who called himself "Klunk" were seen staggering out of the Abbey Tavern heading towards the west side, destination unknown. Days later, Klunk was reported to say something along the lines of "He should be known as Magic Johnson" and we're pretty sure he wasn't talking about St. Ides.

The Patriots mascot got arrested in a prostitution sting in Rhode Island. Apparantly there's a new law in our littlest state that now makes prostitution illegal both outdoors and indoors, and I had to ask "Huh?" Let me get this straight: up until recently prostitution was legal in Rhode Island if it was conducted indoors? First of all, how did I not know about this when I was in my 20s, and second of all how the hell did I not know about this when I was in my goddamn 20s????  Meanwhile I keep imagining that giant headed Patriot dude trying to get his f on, saying things like "be still dear wench whilst I unbutton my trousers and lay aside my musket". Seriously, I wonder if he used his celebrity to try to get reduced rates from the hookers. You know, things like "I can get you a lap dance with Tom Brady AND Randy Moss". Actually, the Moss thing is probably no big deal, I'm sure he's getting them all the time. Besides, rumor has it that Moss goes limp every third lap dance much to the shagrin of Brady and the coaching staff. 

The Packers won a game today in spite of themselves. Once, just once, I'd like to seem them throw a 6 yard pass on third and five.  Or a 7 yard pass on third and 6. Mike McCarthy seems to think that third and short means it's time to take a shot down field, and it never ever works. Well, sometimes it works, but four out of five times it kills a drive. I swear to the good Christ I was cursing at my poor TV today as we let the Bears back in the game, but thank goodness it was the Bears. Lovie Smith hasn't quite lost these guys, but they are poorly coached. The Bears commit more false starts than any other team I've seen: they're like a third quarter preseason unit. The Packers no longer know how to sustain a drive. There offense is run a few plays, pass a few plays, take a shot down field and punt. Of course when the Packers face third and long, you can rest assured that McCarthy will call for a  pass that is long minus 6 or 7 yards. Or that inside handoff out of the shotgun that fools no one. Still, my Packers have won 5 in a row so I can't complain. Next week they face the Stealers in Pittsburgh and as pedestrian as the Stealers have been, this is no easy task. The game has been moved to a 4:15 EST start (3:15 for our reader in Wisconsin) so next Sunday please don't bother me between, say, 4PM and 8PM, or later if they win.

On a personal note, Mrs. Samichlaus has been listening to a lot of "Lady Ga Ga" lately. It's gotten so bad that yesterday she told me that all her dreams at night now have "Lady Ga Ga" for their soundtrack. Who knew you could add soundtracks to your dreams? I have to try that. Tonight I'm going to open every dream with the "Looney Tunes" theme, because my dreams have this cartoon sense of reality to them. Sort of like my life at times, come to think of it. But back to the Lady Ga Ga thing: the music is quite catchy, especially when it's being cranked at decibles that rival the Concord passing over Rosedale, NY. That stuff gets in your head: La la la la la la. Rah ma rah ma ma ma.  Or my favorite "Poker Face", which if you haven't seen my old neighborhood jelly donut salesman  perform it then you're in for a treat...

Week 14 - The Home Stretch

Samichlaus actually sent me his Thursday pick during the afternoon on Thursday, but we didn't get it up. We're not cheating. Really.

It's going to be cold as a fill in your hackneyed metaphor here tonight in Cleveland, with temperatures at kickoff expected to be at 19 degrees. But does this favor the home team or the visitors? Read on dear reader, read on...

Pittsburgh (6-6) at Cleveland (1-11) +10.5
As bad as Pittsburgh has been, and as tough as Cleveland historically plays them, I am leaning towards the Stealers. I have two reasons for this thinking: first, the Stealers are the better team and second the Stealers are the more desperate team. Remember, desperation is measured by what you have to play for and at this stage all the Browns have left to play for is pride. The Stealers are still in the playoff hunt as they vie for a wildcard spot.They have lost 4 in a row and are due for a win. Add to that the challenge put forth to them by head coach Mike Tomlin, who called out the team earlier this week for their poor play and I see Pittsburgh finally putting it all together. Pittsburgh 23 Cleveland 10

I always seem to be late on the Thursday picks, but I promise I'm not picking the winner after the fact. As bad as Cleveland has been, the Stealers are in trouble. A struggling running game, a banged up Hines Ward. And their defense just isn't itself without Troy Polamalu. (The Madden Curse strikes again!) I didn't think the Browns were actually going to win, but I'd gladly take 10 points.

Miami (6-6) at Jacksonville (7-5) -2.5
A battle of Florida with huge playoff implications. It seems like just last week the Jags were getting tatered by Seattle. Meanwhile the Fins are just 1 game behind the Pats for the AFC East lead after last week's impressive win. I still don't trust the Jags at all. David Garrard is a disaster waiting to happen. Meanwhile, former Wolverine Chad Henne is doing a halfway decent job of learning under pressure and already has a few impressive game winning drives under his belt. I like Miami to romp. Dolphins 31, Jags 17.

Carolina (5-7) at New England (7-5) -13.5
That's a lot of points. I said last week if the Pats lose, it's panic time. It sure is. Brady just doesn't look like he has the same invincible aura of past years. Belichick no longer looks like a genius. Moss may be sulking. And they're slowly losing their grip on the division with both the Jets and Fins only 1 game back. Meanwhile, some guy named Moore continues to qb the Panthers in place of injured Delhomme. I don't know what to think here. I'd never really touch this game with an actual bet, but I'll take the Pats, just barely. Pats 31, Panthers 17.

Denver (8-4) at Indianapolis (12-0) -7.5
Talk about a team that's hard to figure out. I was going to take Denver at KC last week until I read Denver was like 1-20 at KC in December. And the Broncos proceeded to kill the Chiefs. Meanwhile the Colts methodically continue to march towards an undefeated season. Let me throw this out there for the first time - how nuts would it be if we Colts vs Saints in the Super Bowl, both undefeated? I wonder if that would be the most watched game of all time. Let's keep the dream alive. Colts 31, Broncos 17.

Buffalo (4-8) at Kansas City (3-9) -0.5
See above. The Chiefs have let me down for the last time this season. Bills 26, Chiefs 20.

Cincinnati (9-3) at Minnesota (10-2) -6.5
So the Vikes have finally been brought down to reality a bit. The Bengals offense has sputtered a bit since Cedric Benson got hurt. He's playing, but between the injury and heavy workload, he hasn't looked the same. Still, the Bengals seem to be in a close game every week - whether it's not covering a 10+ spread against horrible teams like the Browns or sticking around with the top teams. I'm taking the points, and wouldn't be surprised if the Bengals win outright as chinks in the Minnesota armor start to become exposed just in time for the playoffs. Bengals 26, Vikings 23.

NY Jets (6-6) at Tampa Bay (1-11) +3.5
I took the Bucs last week and paid for it as Josh whathisname was able to move the ball against Carolina, but threw 5 picks. I was going to take the Bucs again this week with Dirty Sanchez out for the Jets. Then I was talking to one of my co-workers who's a huge Jets fan, and he insisted the Kellen Clemens is a good QB. Well, maybe "good" is too strong a word. But he was insistent that Clemens is way better than Sanchez right now. Usually I would blow this off as homer optimism, but this dude is usually realistic. And does anybody who isn't a huge fan of a team usually know anything about their backup other than the fundamental "They're a backup, they must suck" assumption? I'm going with his advice and taking the Jets. Jets 27, Bucs 13.

New Orleans (12-0) at Atlanta (6-6) +9.5
Man, the Saints almost seem like a team of destiny after last week's win, huh? Lost in all media frenzy following the game celebrating their improbable win to remain undefeated (and the subsequent release of the Skins kicker who cost them the game) was one important fact - the Saints failed to cover. Despite the Falcons being amazingly banged up, I'm taking the points again. Saints 30, Falcons 23.

Detroit (2-10) at Baltimore (6-6) -13.5
The Lions are keeping their games close. No, really. I guess most people aren't noticing because Vegas keeps giving them double-digit points. Well, I'm going to keep taking them. Just like the Pittsburgh defense isn't the say without Polamalu, the Ravens defense misses Ed Reed. Speaking of those two, there's a young safety named Eric Berry coming out this year who people are comparing to those two. There's been some debate on Seahawks boards I frequent about whether or not Seattle should spend what looks like potentially a top 10 pick on a safety. After seeing the difference a safety of this caliber makes (and this year is a perfect example of what a difference they make with both missing games), I'd say take him in a heartbeat. But I digress... Taking the points. Ravens 23, Lions 13.

Green Bay (8-4) at Chicago (5-7) +3.5
Good win last week for the Packers. They look like a playoff team. What the heck has gotten into former Wolverine Charles Woodson? It was 12 years ago that he won the Heisman Trophy, and this could possibly be his best season yet. Unheard of for a DB who usually lose a step or two by then. Anyways, Cutler has been pretty much a disaster in Chicago, the defense stinks, and they have no running game. Unless the Packers fall asleep on them (and I doubt they will against a divisional rival), they should win this easily. Speaking of the Heisman, it's being awarded tonight, and there's some huge DT from Nebraska named Ndamukong Suh among the 5 finalists. There's a decent chance he'll win it, which will make him the first defensive player to win it since Woodson. (And, really, Woodson had the advantage of being a playmaker on special teams too, returning kicks and punts.) This Suh guy looks unstoppable and may just be the overall #1 pick next spring if he can stay out of trouble and have a decent combine. He seems to be a freak. I'd love him in Seattle keeping their LBs clean. Oh, back to the game.. Aaron Rodgers has looked good lately too. Packers 29, Bears 20.

Seattle (5-7) at Houston (5-7) -6.5
My optimism about Seattle last week paid off. But with the Cardinals beating the Vikings, their shot at the NFC West is all but dead. Still, they have a mathematical chance at the Wild Card, and it's always good to end the season in a positive way. One other angle - Matt Hasselbeck missed two and half games. The game he got hurt against the Niners, they were down 13-10 at halftime and Seneca Wallace proceeded to put up a goose egg in the second half. And home against the Bears, they were two missed field goals away from winning despite Wallace looking below average all game. I know it's a pathetic "what if?" situation, but it may demonstrate the Seattle really isn't as bad as they've seemed at times. Erase that Hasselbeck injury, and this team could very easily be 7-5 and knocking on the playoff door. Meanwhile, the Texans continue to let me down, having cost me wins in my money pool (where I'm clinging to a 3-game lead) the past two weeks. I think Seattle wins this outright, as the Texans fall out of playoff contention with a resounding thud. Seahawks 26, Texans 24.

St. Louis (1-11) at Tennessee (5-7) -13.5
The Rams have been playing better of late. And the Titans recovery from an 0-6 start hit a wall last week against the Colts. But Chris Johnson is just too much to handle for almost every team in the league. Yes, he's better than Adrian Peterson. Titans 27, Rams 10.

Washington (3-9) at Oakland (4-8) +1.5
I said last week that the Raiders had a puncher's chance against the Stealers with Jamarcus Russell finally benched. I'll stick with that theme and say they win a handful of more games with this uhhhh what's his name? Gradkowski or something? Anyways, yeah. The Skins had a chance for a season-defining victory over the Saints last week and blew it. That about sums up their season. Raiders 24, Skins 17.

San Diego (9-3) at Dallas (8-4) -3.5
Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas! The Chargers are hot hot hot! And as we mentioned last week, welcome to the annual Cowboys December collapse. The pressure on them this week at home has got to be immense. And I haven't known Tony Romo to do well under pressure. Speaking of which, apparently he'll be holding on kicks again starting this week. The first time he's done so since bobbling that potential game winning field goal snap in the playoffs in Seattle two years ago. Ahhhh, that was such a sweet moment. Let's raise a glass of egg nog to toast to another Romo holiday fiasco! PS - The Dallas defense really isn't anything special. Chargers 27, Cowboys 20.

Philadelphia (8-4) at NY Giants (7-5) -1.5
The winner of this game will claim 1st place in the NFC East if (when) Dallas loses to the Chargers. Everybody seems to love the Eagles. And I almost do. Except I believe that the Giants have made some adjustments in their secondary to address some of the holes they had earlier in the season. They've got their confidence back after whalloping Dallas, and the crowd should be pretty nuts at the Meadowlands for this one. Oh, and I can't remember McNabb having a horrible game yet this year. He's due. Giants 27, Eagles 16.

Arizona (8-4) at San Francisco (5-7) +3.5‬‪
Holy poop, here come the Cardinals! Around this time last year, they were getting ice cold and basically stumbling into the playoffs. They had wrapped up the god awful NFC West by now, and lost some intensity playing meaningless games, and people didn't take them seriously come playoff time. Well, as we all know, they turned it on, got hot, and made that unlikely run to the Super Bowl. This year? I predict the opposite. They continue to play well into the playoffs, and just as all the writers say "Hey, this team can repeat as NFC Champs!" they lose in the first round at home to a Wild Card team like the Packers. In fact, let's take it a bit further. Packers at Arizona, first round. Nick Barnett has 2 sacks and Charles Woodson has 2 picks as Green Bay pulls off the upset. You heard it here first. Anyways, the Niners usually play them tough, but I'll lay the points and stick to my prediction. Cardinals 29, Niners 24.

Week 13 - Don't tell the Cowboys it's December

Wecome to December, or as it's referred to in Dallas, "Baseball Season". Yes friends your favorite sports blogging idiots have not forgotten you, and if St. Ides can wrest himself away from the X-Box he too may have some picks. There are a lot of good matchups this week, including a Monday Night game that Ol' Samichlaus has a rooting interest in so let's get to it...

For the record, I don't own an XBox. Though I do have a Nintendo Wii. And a fridge downstairs that is used for mostly beer. And DVR. And now, thanks to a generous co-worker who lives in Seattle, a Sehawks Santa hat. It's awesome. Oh and by the way, I took the Jets on Thursday night. For no other reason than someone named "JETSFAN13" (I'm not sure if that's his age or IQ) is only 3 games behind me in my money pool, and I figured he'd take the Jets. So I took them to nullify his pick. He didn't take them, Jets won, and now I'm 4 games up. It's going to be a nailbiting final 5 weeks.


Tennessee (5-6) at Indianapolis (11-0) -6.5
Sure the Titans are on a bit of a hot streak, and sure the Colts keep winning close games, but the Colts should have no problem winning this game at home by a TD. Colts 31 Titans 20

I've been sticking with the "AFC south divisional games are usually close" plan and it's backfired a few times. But I have to take the pointd here. Since the Colts held Chris Johnson to barely 30 yards several weeks ago, he's gotten at least 130 each game and is now on pace to break 2000 yards. And did you see Vince Young engineer that last minute winning drive last week? Vince freakin Young!! I like what the Titans have been doing lately and they might just win this game outright. Titans 26, Colts 24.

Tampa Bay (1-10) at Carolina (4-7) -6.5
It looks like the Bucs were able to put it together for one lousy game this year… against the Packers. Taking their show on the road brings another defeat. The Cats win and cover: Panthers 23 Buccaneers 10

Jake Delhomme is out with a busted hand or finger or something. Deangelo Williams is out too. If this backup QB were any good, don't you think he would have gotten a shot when Delhomme was completing more passes to opponents than to his own team? Meanwhile, Tampa has kept all their games close since going with the rookie qb. Bucs 24, Cats 23.

Philadelphia (7-4) at Atlanta (6-5) +5.5
One of my Samichlaus insiders broke the news to me this week that Matt Ryan is hurt and that the Falcons are in trouble. Never mind that my insider is an Indian chick who used to work for me, she’s pretty bright. I’ll trust my knowledge worker. Eagles 27 Falcons 17

Similar to the Panthers situation. No Matt Ryan. No Michael Turner. Chris Redman at QB. No chance. Eagles 31, Falcons 20.

New Orleans (11-0) at Washington (3-8) +9.5
Who dat? The Saints continue their march and have no problems against an outclassed Redskins team. Though I’m taking the Saints, I’m curious to watch how the Skins D tries to stop Drew Brees. I like the Redskins D, just not as much as I like the Saints. New Orleans 37 Washington 20

The Saints sure looked good dismantling the Pats. But that was the first game they've covered in 5 weeks. The Skins have been more competitive of late. I'm taking the points. Saints 32, Skins 26

St. Louis (1-10) at Chicago (4-7) -8.5
And so God smiled on his God forsaken children in Chicago and said “I have made you to suffer by causing you to live in this God forsaken city, always in the shadows of New York, no matter how high you build your buildings. Thus I take pity upon you good, yet dumb people and send you these sacrificial Rams. Have at ‘em”. Chicago by 10. Bears 20 Rams 10

The Bears have been brutal. I'd argue they're worse than their record. Their defense is a shell of what it once was. They can't run the ball worth a damn. And the supposed savior QB Jay Cutler has been underwhelming. I'm petrified of taking Kyle Boller on the road though. Flip a coin.. Bears 20, Rams 13.

Detroit (2-9) at Cincinnati (8-3) -13.5
I’m tempted to take those points but I’ll save it for the next game. The Bengals should cruise at home against a Lions team that will need at least 5 years to recover from Matt Millen. Bengals 35 Lions 13

Cinci is starting to get the respect they deserve this season. But maybe too much respect. They haven't been covering big spreads against crappy teams like the Browns and Raiders. Chalk up another win but failed cover. Bengals 27, Lions 17.

Oakland (3-8) at Pittsburgh (6-5) -13.5
Call me crazy but I’m taking the Raiders in this game. Maybe because they do occasionally pull the upset, or maybe because there are cracks in the Stealers armor, but either way 13.5 is too much Christmas punch for Samichlaus to handle. Stealers 27 Raiders 17

Love the silly internal bickering between Hines Ward and Big Ben about whether he should have played last week while concussed. I hate them both. Oakland is an enigma, but at least they've finally benched Jamarcus Russell. That gives them a puncher's chance. Stealers 23, Raiders 13.

Houston (5-6) at Jacksonville (6-5) -0.5
After a modest three game winning streak, the Jags got the snot kicked out of them by the Niners last week. Meanwhile Houston has a must win game as their season hangs in the balance. Both teams are equally desperate, so I’ll go with the home team and give a meaningless half point. Jags 27 Texans 24

In my pool last week I took the Texans last week and the points against the Colts. When they went up 14-0, I was thinking I was looking good. Houston then proceeded to get outscored 31-6 before scoring a last minute garbage TD. Meanwhile Jacksonville moved the ball at will against the Niners, and repeatedly turned over the ball in the red zone. I don't trust either of these teams really, but I trust the Jags less. Texans 31, Jaguars 20.

Denver (7-4) at Kansas City (3-8) +4.5
The last time I bet against KC at home I lost. The last time I took Denver on the road I lost. Any questions? Chiefs 24 Broncos 23

I'm pretty sure the Broncos are a below average team despite their record. I know KC is a below average team. I was tempted to take Denver, and then I read they're something like 1-20 at Arrowhead in December. I'll take the home dog. Chiefs 24, Broncos 23.

New England (7-4) at Miami (5-6) +4.5
The Patriots have disappointed on the road this season, winning only once against that juggernaut that is the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. I’ll stick with that trend and go against the grain. I’ll have the fish please, hold the tarter sauce, and a side of New England clam chowder to go. Patriots 30 Dolphins 28

I haven't seen the Pats get spanked like that since the first game of the season several years ago against the Bills right after they'd cut Lawyer Milloy. Wow. Has Belichick lost his mojo? Has his deal with the devil expired? Whatever it is, this Pats defense looks fairly unreliable against a good offense. Now, if Miami a good offense with Chad Henne at QB and Ronnie Brown out? That's debatable. If the Pats lose this, it's panic time. I don't see Brady letting that happen. Pats 27, Fins 20.

San Diego (8-3) at Cleveland (1-10) +13.5
The Bolts keep getting better and better, while the Browns get worse. I did look up the forecast for Cleveland on Sunday and found out it’s going to be sunny and 40 degrees. In other words there’s nothing standing in the Chargers way. Bolts 37 Browns 13

The Browns have actually hung around in a few games recently. But they're probably the worst team in the league. Two years ago with the emergence of Derek Anderson and the drafting of Brady Quinn, it looked like they had the enviable problem of two quality QBs. Now? Looks like they both suck. Meanwhile Phillip Rivers has been putting up points in bunches. I'll lay the home points this time. Chargers 34, Browns 10.

San Francisco (5-6) at Seattle (4-7) -0.5
So Seattle’s GM quit this week and Mike Holmgren wants back in. Wowsers. Is that because Holmgren was so good as a GM that the Seahawks had to bring in Ted Thompson to run the football operations? Anyway, this is going to be as good game. I’m giving the edge to Seattle for home field advantage. They can handle Frank Gore, can’t they? Seahawks 24 Niners 20

Seattle GM Tim Ruskell is out after he asked ownership about his future (this was the last year of his contract), and they said they wouldn't be having him back. Let the rumors of Holmgren's return begin! Reading some quotes from Seahawk players this week, they seem to really believe they still have a shot to make the playoffs. Really? Seriously? I don't think so. This team doesn't look good enough to run the table the rest of the way, especially on defense. When they played the Niners earlier this year, Hasselbeck suffered those broken ribs in the first half and Frank Gore tore them up. They managed to contain Steven Jackson last week and Kyle Boller couldn't make them pay. If they can contain gore, it's unlikely Alex Smith can make them pay. I'm going to show a little optimism for a change. Seahawks 27, Niners 23.

Dallas (8-3) at NY Giants (6-5) +2.5
All those drunken elves running around Samichlaus’s workshop can only mean one thing: it’s December! Time for Tony Romo (who was spotted in Vegas last week) to mail in the rest of his season. Gosh, don’t you just love Christmas time? Giants 30 Cowboys 24

Let the annual Cowboys December collapse begin! And who better to start it off than the Giants. I still think the Cowboys are a bit overrated. I don't really have much faith in the Giants or Eli Manning, but this is the NFL and teams play Jeckyl and Hyde every week. My guess is the Giants pass rush and secondary look like their old selves (at least for a week) and we see Romo leaving the field shaking his head after throwing his 3rd pick. Giants 24, Cowboys 20.

Minnesota (10-1) at Arizona (7-4) +4.5
Since I can never seem to get my Arizona picks right, and I really want them to win this week, I’m picking against them. By the way Brett Favre is a serious contender for MVP this year. If he should win, it would be the sixth time Favre was awarded the MVP. Three previous awards were for “Most Valuable Player” and two other times Favre nailed the award for “Most Vicodin Prescriptions” Vikings 37 Cardinals 24

There's still some doubt whether or not Kurt Warner will play. That loss to the Titans last week can be the kind of crushing loss that derails a season. Luckily for Arizona, the NFC West blows. Meanwhile, Favre has an 8:1 TD to INT ratio, which would be the best ever for a season. (24:3) Now, it only takes one pick to knock that down to 6:1, but still, for a "gunslinger" like Favre who's usually closer to 3:1, it's pretty amazing. Like I said earlier, I'm going to be optimistic about Seattle for this week at least, and the Cards getting destroyed would further that cause. Vikings 37, Cardinals 23.

Baltimore (6-5) at Green Bay (7-4) -3.5
This game is a huge test for the Packers, who have come alive starting with their win over Dallas. A lot has been made about the Packers #1 ranked defense in the NFC, but even the players know there is something fishy about this. The stat is based on total yards allowed per game, and the Packers have indeed allowed somewhere around 281 yards per game. But the Pack is ranked 5th in scoring allowed and 7th in touchdowns allowed. So why the discrepancy? It all comes back to special teams play. Because the Packers special teams have been so terrible, opposing teams are always playing with a short field. So yes the Packers D gives up less yards than any other NFC team, but that’s partly because they have less yards to defend. By the way, do you know which team has a better ranked defense than Green Bay? The New York Jets. OK, back to the game. I’m not sold on the Packers quite yet. The Dallas game was special, but really who have they beaten? Meanwhile the Ravens are all over the map. I like the Ravens, they are a nasty football team, but I’m taking the Packers for two reasons: home field and long rest after the Thanksgiving game. Packers 23 Ravens 17

How the hell are the Packers 7-4? Weren't we writing them (and Nick Barnett) off just a few weeks ago? Speaking of writing people off, I know he doesn't have a lot of weapons at receiver, but I'm starting to think Joe Flacco is looking like the typical "just manage games and don't lose them but can't single-handedly win them either" Ravens QB. Welcome to the Frozen Tundra, Joe. Packers 26, Ravens 20.

Thursday night, Week (W+L) + 2, where W = your teams total wins and L = that same team's total losses...

So we're back for another Thursday night of football, this evenings contest pitting the schizophrenic  New York Jets against the equally schizophrenic  but generally suckier Buffalo Bills. Not a lot of motivation to put deep thought into this one, but have at it.

NY Jets (5-6) vs Buffalo (4-7) +3.5

Buffalo is a bad football team coming off a surprising win last week against the Dolphins. But since the firing of head coach Dick Jauron, one thing I've noticed is a spark of chemistry between new QB Ryan Fitzpatrick and WR Terrell Owens. All of a sudden T.O. is getting the ball, making plays, and staying involved. Of course the dude has a one year contract so one can argue that now is the time to, uh, turn it up a notch. The Jets are also coming off a big win against the Panthers, and have taken steps to address some of the erratic play of their QB Mark Sanchez. The game is being played in Toronto, which is a lot like Buffalo except its cleaner and you can get better health care there. Oh, and there are some fine restaurants in Toronto, particularly north east of the city in the Don Valley region. Since the Bills are showcasing their franchise for a potential move, I'm taking the Bills to win outright.   Buffalo 24 New York Jets 20

Thanksgiving Sunday

Hi kids, Samichlaus here. As you know this is my busy season: the elves and I are getting the sled all filled with beer and pretzels to bring to all the good little children on Christmas morning. So with that said, I’m going to do these quick and dirty… but you can’t say that Ol’ Samichlaus stiffed ya!.

Washington (3-7) at Philadelphia (6-4) -9.5
The Eagles are one of the teams that currently holds a wild card slot (Green Bay is the other), so look for them to play hard and dominant football against their division rival. I like them at home with the points. Eagles 30 Redskins 13

Tampa Bay (1-9) at Atlanta (5-5) -11.5
Tampa has reverted back to their losing ways, and that’s because the league has a little bit of film to study of Josh Freeman. Atlanta has not lost at home, but has definitely become mediocre. 11.5 is a lot, but I’ll bite. Atlanta wins and covers. Falcons 37 Bucs 20

Seattle (3-7) at St. Louis (1-9) +3.5
Two bad teams and one home dog. Although Seattle is the better team, I’ll take the Rams. Kyle Boller gets the nod for the injured Mark Bulger, but really this might be an upgrade. St Louis 20 Seattle 17

Cleveland (1-9) at Cincinnati (7-3) -13.5
The Bengals got caught napping against the Raiders last week and it cost them. They got a little full of themselves and the end result was a loss. Meanwhile the Browns played their hearts out against the Lions but still lost. I don’t think Cinci lets that happen twice, but I’ll take the points. Cincinnati 34 Cleveland 24


Miami (5-5) at Buffalo (3-7) +3.5
Miami has started to come together, in part thanks to the rejuvenated Rickey Williams who had a career game last week. Now granted we’re taking a warm weather team and moving them to the cold, but the Fins are used to it, and they always play the Pats and Jets tough. I’ll take them and give the points: Miami 24 Buffalo 17

Indianapolis (10-0) at Houston (5-4) +3.5
A lot of people like Houston this week, and I keep waiting for the Colts to lose. But mama didn’t raise no dummies. Take the Colts. Indy 34 Houston 30

Carolina (4-6) at NY Jets (4-6) -3.5
So now I hear Rex Ryan is personally going to nurture Mark Sanchez? Gol! I do not want to see pictures of that. In fact, please get that image of Sanchez suckling one of Ryan’s manboobs out of my head. For the love of Pete… Jets 27 Panther 20

Jacksonville (6-4) at San Francisco (4-6) -3.5
After watching San Francisco against Green Bay, I’ve learned that you can’t ever count them out. I also learned that they aren’t as good as I thought they were. Jacksonville keeps winning close games, so why should this week be any different? Jags 24 Niners 23

Kansas City (3-7) at San Diego (7-3) -13.5
After a huge, huge win against the Stealers, KC takes it on the road… and loses soundly to the Bolts. More on the Pittsburgh fiasco in a bit. Samichlaus says “Two TD’s are no problem”. Chargers 37 Chiefs 13

Arizona (7-3) at Tennessee (4-6) -2.5
I love what’s happening in Tennessee, and I’m going to ride them one more week. Sure the Cardinals are a good team, better than I thought, but momentum favors the Titans. Tennessee 27 Arizona 24

Chicago (4-6) at Minnesota (9-1) -10.5
Well, I can’t do that “Jay Cutler looks more like Rick Cutler” joke because (a) I’ve already done it and (b) St. Ides is the only one who gets it. You had to know Rick. Has anyone looked at Favre’s numbers lately? The guy’s a freak! Vikings 37 Bears 13

Pittsburgh (6-4) at Baltimore (5-5) -2.5
Stick a fork in the Stealers, they’re done. Big Ben is doubtful due to a concussion but honestly who would know the difference? What KC did to them last week was beyond fathomable. Ravens 30 Stealers 13

New England (7-3) at New Orleans (10-0) -2.5
Damn! Kudos to the NFL schedule maker for bringing us this gem. I have to say, I’ll be rooting for the Pats but I’m picking the Saints. Once again, until someone proves me wrong… Saints 30 Patriots 27

Gobble Gobble!

Greetings from your favorite sports blogging jive turkeys, and yes I do that line every year at Thanksgiving. Consider it a holiday tradition, like stuffing or the Lions losing a football game. Anyway, we’re all set here at the Samichlaus household. The in-laws will be here and all the provisions have been secured. Dinner is set for 4:00 sharp, which should give me plenty of time to watch the Packers gobble up the Lions…

Green Bay (6-4) at Detroit (2-8) +10.5
Despite losing Al Harris and Aaron Kampman for the season, the Pack should have no trouble beating Detroit with ease on Thursday. Matthew Stafford is doubtful, leaving QB duties to Daunte Culpepper. Culpepper was never a good QB: whatever success he had was gained by throwing the ball to Randy Moss and Chris Carter. This will be a good break-in game for the Packers new secondary alignment, getting them ready for the Ravens a week from Monday. In addition, the Pack has begun to run the ball a lot better. Last week against a real good run defense Ryan Grant had a field day, amassing 129 yards on 21 carries. In fact, ever since Samichlaus had his come to Jesus tweetfest with Nick Barnett, the Packers have improved all facets of their game. Like my dad used to say to me “Every once and a while you need the old man to kick your ass”. It’s OK Nick, you can thank me after the season. One final note: as I was researching this game, I came across this on the Lions web site: “Conference Call Transcript with Packers Head Coach Brian McCarthy”. Brian McCarthy? Well, I guess they could have called him this guy, I mean what’s the difference between one wooden dummy and another?  Packers 34 Lions 20

I was going to say, that's two pretty important pieces of the defense going down. Ouch. And that's pretty frickin embarassing that the Lions official website got the head coach's name wrong. Are we sure Matt Millen isn't still working for Detriot behind the scenes? For a split second, I thought to myself "You know, wouldn't it be interesting of Culpepper turned back the clock like 10 years and wound up lighting up the banged up Packers secondary?" Then I came to my senses. Packers 31, Lions 17.

Oakland (3-7) at Dallas (7-3) -13.5
Cowboys fans: enjoy this game. December is a week away, and that means it’s time for the annual Tony Romo meltdown. This year’s meltdown will be titled “Jessica’s Revenge”, since those dumb ass Texans won’t be able to blame their Quarterback’s woes on the strange he happens to be getting. Unless of course he’s been dating a Kardashian and I don’t know it? I’ve got to hand it to Romo. For a guy from Wisconsin he actually gets to have intercourse with some fairly high profile poon tang. And that’s meant with no disrespect to Wisconsin, a state that all of our readers know Ol’ Samichlaus holds near and dear to his heart… especially the clogged arteries around my heart. But seriously, you’d never hear those chicks on “Sex and the City” pining over Mohitos saying “Oh, I wish I could meet a nice guy from Sheboygan”, or “So Carrie, are you and Horst getting together tonight?” Truly their loss: I’m sure Horst is a real nice fella, you betcha. But even those guys from “Weezer” probably wind up bedding down with an occasional frau. Anyway, I like the Cowboys to dominate. Dallas 37 Oakland 10

The only thing worse than having to suffer through the Cowboys every Thanksgiving is having to suffer through them with my obnoxious Cowboy-fan uncle talking about how great they are. Thankfully last season when they tatered the Seahawks, we were at my in-laws, so I was spared. This year, in our "rotating holiday appearance" schedule, we'll be at my cousin's house, and I'll be subjected to that uncle. I can only hope the Raiders shock and surprise them. And you know what, now that they've finally benched Jamarcus Russell, they've shown some signs of life. Sort of how the Titans have responded to Vince Young. I'm taking the points, and I think Romo (doesn't he have an injured pinkie or something too?) starts his December swoon a little early. Cowboys 23, Raiders 20.

NY Giants (6-4) at Denver (6-4) +6.5
This is the second most interesting game of the week, behind the Monday nighter in New Orleans. Right now neither of these teams are very good. The Giants tried their best to blow the game last week, squandering a 14 point 4th quarter lead to Atlanta. And what can I say about Denver, who lost to the Redskins and got thoroughly whooped by the Chargers. Denver has two things going for them this week: they are at home, and they get Kyle Orton back. Now, make no mistake about it: I think the Giants will win this game. But I also think Denver makes it close enough to keep it interesting. Lately the Giants D hasn’t been able to stop anyone, and that trend is going to continue against the Broncos. Take Denver and the points, and if you have either Manning or Orton on your fantasy team, play them. It’s going to be a wild west shoot out…. Giants 37 Broncos 34

Denver at home getting that many points against a Giants team that's struggled looks too good to pass up. So good, in fact, that something is fishy. Vegas is BEGGING people to take the Broncos in this game. Well, I'm not falling for it. It's been a crazy season for Denver so far, and only promises to continue to be. As I may have mentioned before, Seattle holds Denver's 2010 1st round draft pick. Going into this season, expectations for Denver were low.. Then they rattled off 6 wins to open the season, and it looked like that draft pick wouldn't nearly be as valuable as it had seemed before the season. Now? With every passing debacle, that pick edges closer and closer to becoming a top 10 pick. It's entirely possible that Seattle will hold two picks in the top 10 next year, in what is widely considered a very strong draft. I'll be watching Denver very carefully, but I think we're starting to see why the expectations were so low for them before the season. Eli has a field day yo. Giants 31, Broncos 23.

Week 5+4+2

Dude, I don't even know what week it is! Anyway, I'm all done. The doc attacched says week 10. I think that's right...

Math lesson! So all the byes are over with now for the year (yay!) Take your team’s record, add the wins and losses together, add 2 (1 for their bye week, and 1 because it’s the “current” week and the game hasn’t been played yet), and you have the week. So take the Packers: 5 wins, 4 losses. 5+4=9. 9+2=11. Week 11 baby! On to the picks:

Miami (4-5) at Carolina (4-5) -3.5
Ronnie Brown going down for the season is a huge blow to the Dolphins. The one man offense tore one of those pesky cruciate ligaments and no, I don’t know which one. All I know is Brown is out, and the Dolphins look to Ricky Williams and Rookie QB Pat White to fill in the role. The Panthers impressed me against the Falcons last week, and are on a bit of a roll winning 3 of their last 5, but I’m not overly confident picking them against a 3-4 defense such as the Dolphins. In the end it comes down to this: the Fins lost their best player this week, and take away their one playmaker and that becomes a difference maker. Carolina 27 Miami 17

Actually, I think he broke his foot. Linscsomethingorother fracture was what I read. But yeah, him going down hurts him. Does that mean Pat White gets on the field more? Probably. And can Ricky Williams find the Fountain of Youth? Probably not. (And even if he did, that might also lead him back to his days of smoking weed and not caring much about football. So either way, they’re screwed.) I actually watched the end of the Bucs-Fins game last week and saw that AWFUL pick Henne threw to give up the presumptive winning score. But then I watched him bounce back nicely and carve up the good ol’ prevent defense and lead the team to victory. I’m quite torn on this game, but I’m going to say it’s been too many weeks without a Jake Delhomme collapse and he’s due. Dolphins 23, Panthers 17.

Indianapolis (9-0) at Baltimore (5-4) -0.5
The Colts just keep finding ways to win, whether by the talent of their quarterback, the idiocy of their opposing coach, the typical favorite treatment by the officials, or a symbiotic convergence of all three as was the case last week against the Patriots. I keep thinking “this is the week they lose” and I keep thinking wrong. So as long as they keep winning, I’m not going to try to outsmart them. As much as I love Baltimore at home, I’m getting right back on that Colts bandwagon. Colts 34 Ravens 27

Not sure how this spread was so low when I grabbed these from my pool on Wednesday, but there it is. The spread is up to 7 now. So this seems like pretty much a gimme. Although that means that everyone and their mother’s in this pool is going to take Indy. Which is tempting me to go the other way. But I just can’t after seeing that win over the Pats last weekend. Poor Anonymous. I might feel bad for him if Seattle actually had any Super Bowl titles. Joe Flacco, meet Dwight Freeney. Colts 36, Ravens 23.

Buffalo (3-6) at Jacksonville (5-4) -8.5
Honestly, I thought Wade Phillips would be gone by week 10, but the great Dick Jauron? Easy kids, that’s sarcasm. Years ago I saw an NFL Films special called “Holmgren’s Heros” where Mike Holmgren was on a panel with all the head coaches he spawned. There was Steve Mariucci, Jon Gruden, Mike Sherman, and Dick Jauron. Holmgren loved Jauron. At one point he said something like “you were the only one that I thought would be a great head coach”. I guess there’s a reason why Holmgren didn’t do so well as the GM in Seattle. He’s not a real good judge of personnel. In other words it’s easy to win a Super Bowl with Brett Favre and Reggie White on your side. Buffalo is falling apart and Jacksonville is hanging around. I like Jacksonville to win with ease and cover by 10. Jacksonville 31 Buffalo 21

Did you guys see Maurice Jones-Drew take that knee on the Jets 1-yard line so they could burn off the final minute of time and kick the winning field goal? Brilliant stuff. The NFL is so weird. How the hell did this team get blown out (and shutout) by Seattle just a few weeks ago? I’ll never figure this stuff out… And yes, Dick Jauron is a pretty awful coach. There’s a lot of awful coaches these days it seems. It’ll be interesting to see where (if anywhere) Holmgren, Shanahan, Cowher, Gruden, Dungy, and Lombardi show up next year. And since you brought up Holmgren… He gets a bit of a bum rap for his GM job in Seattle. Yes, he made some mistakes, but mostly on the defensive side of the ball during the draft. You also have to give him credit for trading a bag of used balls for Matt Hasselbeck. Some other highlights: trading Joey Galloway to Dallas for two first round picks (which turned into Shaun Alexander and Koren Robinson). Drafting Steve Hutchinson (and he never would have gotten away if Holmgren was still GM). Signing key free agents Bobby Engram, Trent Dilfer (who played fairly well before Hasselbeck was ready to be the starter), and keeping Walter Jones around by franchinsing him (and relatively happy, as franchise tagged players go). Anyways, his replacement, Tim Ruskell, has fallen out of favor recently with the team’s struggles the past two years. He’s in his last year of contract. So, maybe just maybe, there could be a return of Holmgren to Seattle in strictly a GM role. And I’d be fine with that. Wait, Seattle isn’t even playing in this game we’re talking about? Oops. Jaguars 27, Bills 16.

Cleveland (1-8) at Detroit (1-8) -3.5
Ooooh. Alright, for anyone who gives a rat’s ass I won’t mail this in. Ever notice how Detroit hangs around with every team for about 2 quarters, then just falls apart in the second half of a game? I think they put together a solid 60 minute game once and for all and beat the Browns in Detroit. Home field is good for 3 points, so the way I see it is Detroit has to be a half a point better than the Browns, and I think they are. Detroit 20 Cleveland 15

Yeah, the Lions are better than their record (though not by much). And the Browns are worse than their record. The Lions have hung around in several games, so I agree with the reasoning above. Lions 24, Browns 16.

New Orleans (9-0) at Tampa Bay (1-8) +11.5
Tampa Bay beat the Packers and covered against the heavily favored Dolphins. And now with a week gone since the Packers debacle Ol’ Samichlaus can honestly say that he sees good things in rookie QB Josh Freeman. The guy is a friggin load. Now I don’t think Tampa can beat the Saints, but I think they can keep it close. I’m going out on a bit of a limb here, but let’s go with Tampa and the points Saints 37 Bucs 27

After successfully covering huge spreads for their first six games this season, the Saints have failed to cover for the last three, beginning with that Monday night debacle. Make it four this week. I don’t know if they’re holding back a bit maybe as to save some surprises for the playoffs or if teams are starting to see something, but they’re no longer winning by 3+ TDs every week. Make it four in a row. Saints 37, Bus 28.

San Francisco (4-5) at Green Bay (5-4) -6.5
Wow, that’s a lot of points against a tough 49rs team. There are several keys to a Packers win. First, they must maintain whatever momentum they’ve accumulated with the win over Dallas. Second, they must contain Frank Gore. Third, they must play a crisp west coast offense and control the ball, and that means fourth they must protect the quarterback. The win over the Cowboys was huge and was exactly what they needed to turn the season around. Now they have to execute. The danger is how will they handle the pressure that the Niners will bring. Maybe Singletary’s “stuff” is running thin, but the Niners still play hard every down. I’m going with the Pack: I think they put it together one more time and do it with D. Packers 20 Niners 7

Did I say this league is tough to figure out? The Packers are the perfect example. What the fuck is up with this team? I mean, I went along with my partner’s pick last week just in case Nick Barnett happened to stumble across the blog and got mixed signals. (I mean, if he’s THAT concerned with what his fans think, don’t you believe he Googles his name once in awhile? And just for the hell of it, I Google’d “@NickBarnett”.. We came up on page 13…. He might get that far who knows, but I digress…) Anyways, realistically I thought the Packers were going to get smoked by Dallas, and that maybe my “they’re overrated” philosophy about the Cowboys would have to be buried for a little while. Well, thankfully, I can keep beating that idea into the ground. The Packers seem to have decent talent on both sides of the ball (though their offensive line seems shaky at times), so why can’t they consistently play well? And yes, I think the Singletary’s act is probably getting old with his players. Don’t forget the Niners have no QB. I’ll take the Packers and hope they stay hot. Packers 23, Niners 16.

Seattle (3-6) at Minnesota (8-1) -11.5
Can Seattle please win this darn game? I’m not asking for much, I’m just sick of the Vikings winning close game after close game. That team annoys me. They have so much, now what’s the word I’m looking for, talent? For no other reason than pure rooting interests I’m taking Seattle and the points. 11.5 is too hefty for my tastes. Vikings 30 Seahawks 27

You know, it was 14-0 Seattle over Arizona last week, and I was dancing around my living room, getting my daughter to yell “Go Seahawks!” and thinking to myself “Yes, just don’t blow this, and this season is salvageable!” Well, they blew it. They were outscored 31-6 the rest of the game (including being unable to punch if into the end zone from inside the 15 twice, something you can’t do against an offense like Arizona). They somehow thought it’d be a good idea to only rush 3 and drop 8 all game against Warner… And it DID work for a little while. But come on, mix it up a little. Jesus H. Christ. There’s a slim chance the Vikes look past Seattle and blow this. But more likely is Adrian Peterson running for about 400 yards and this not even being close. Vikings 37, Seahawks 16.

Washington (3-6) at Dallas (6-3) -11.5
The Redskins won a game last week, so they’ve officially met their quota for November, and Dallas looked so woefully inept against the Packers that Packer fans have already starting building the Mike McCarthy statue on Oneida Ave. Well, not really. I think this game is going to be closer than it looks on paper. These are two division rivals going at it, one coming off a big win and the other coming off a big loss. Dallas will be fired up, but so will the Skins who keep it close enough to warrant taking the points. Dallas 27 Washington 20

Yes, the Redskins. Who couldn’t have possibly put up over 20 points against the Broncos, no way. Let’s chain together a few quick clichés and be done with this: Cowboys overrated. A lot of points for a divisional rivalry game. Redskins got a wake-up call win. Blah blah blah. Cowboys 24, Skins 23.

Atlanta (5-4) at NY Giants (5-4) -6.5
I am officially off the Falcons bandwagon. The stinker they put up against the Cats last week was the last straw. Sadly, I am also off the Giants bandwagon who have lost 4 in a row. Since they are coming off a bye, this constitutes a mitigating factor. Look for the Giants to rebound and for Atlanta’s woes to continue. Giants 23 Falcons 15

Yeah, me too. I couldn’t get off that bandwagon soon enough after seeing them look awful against Carolina last week. Matt Ryan is playing like the rookie he should have looked like last year. He’s only thrown for over 230 yards twice this year in 9 games. With weapons like Michael Turner, Anthony Gonzlez, and Roddy White, that’s unacceptable. Meanwhile, the Giants are quickly looking like a non-playoff team. This game could mean a lot at the end of the season when the Wild Card is being decided. Giants 24, Falcons 17.

Pittsburgh (6-3) at Kansas City (2-7) +10.5
Pittsburgh figured out something last week right around the same time Samichlaus figured it out: The Bengals are better than them. I’m sure that doesn’t sit well for Stealer nation and it will sit even worse for poor Kansas City. Giving KC 10.5 at home is a huge deal, but I like Pittsburgh. I think the Stealers bounce back after a tough loss to hand it to the Chiefs with ease. Pittsburgh 31 Kansas City 10

There’s a good clip of annoying Terry Bradshaw guaranteeing that the Bengals don’t beat the Stealers in Pittsburgh last week. Let me see if I can find it real quick… Please hold.. Man, too much Bradshaw on Youtube, no such luck, sorry guys. Anyways, the Chiefs are pretty horrible. A late TD might make this close. Oh screw it, I’ll take the home points. Stealers 27, Chiefs 20.

Arizona (6-3) at St. Louis (1-8) +9.5
The Cardinals continue to play solid consistent football, and this week should be no different. St. Louis has no answer for the Cardinals who should coast in a uneventful matchup. Cardinals 34 Rams 13

You know, the Rams stuck around last week against the Saints. Maybe that gave them a little confidence. I’m a little hesitant to call the Cardinals consistent during a 2-game win streak that includes the horrible Seahawks and Bears. I’ve been saying it’s only a matter of time before Kurt Warner breaks down for two years now, and he keeps proving me wrong. What if I just go with a “take every home team getting more than a TD” plan this week and just call it a day? Cardinals 37, Rams 33.

Cincinnati (7-2) at Oakland (2-7) +9.5
The Bengals are the shiznit right now! I just loooove that they’ve stuck it to Pittsburgh twice! Why the spread on this game isn’t higher is beyond me. Maybe it’s because Oakland has decided to sit uber-bust Jamarcus Russell for, wait, I actually have to google this, Bruce Gradkowski? I don’t get Russell. The guy was all world at LSU and showed some improvements as his first year progressed. But this year it is clear that he has regressed. He simply can’t make the throws. Gradkowski, from Toledo, is an unknown, but I am betting that the Bengals handle this game with aplomb. Bengals 35 Raiders 10

Okay, so it took me all of about 30 seconds to break the rule I just established. I am firmly entrenched on the Bengals bandwagon. Gradkowski actually started a handful of games for Tampa Bay a few years ago, I think it was after Chris Simms got hurt but before they brought in Jeff Garcia. Is he still unsigned? Maybe he got a job doing Broadway? Dammit, someone sign Jeff Garcia for fuck sake! This blog needs him! I’m taking Cinci and their chilli. Bengals 32, Raiders 16.

NY Jets (4-5) at New England (6-3) -10.5
Pity the Jets, who have to face the Patriots after the meltdown in Indy. 10.5 seems like a lot for these two teams, considering the Jets have already beaten them, but I’m leaning towards the Patriots. The reason being after last week’s showing, the Pats are going to look to dominate. I know their head coach (well, not really. In fact I’ve never met the bastard) and I know he won’t hold back this week, no way no how. Patriots 35 Jets 23

This could get ugly. The Patriots are going to be pissed off this week. Besides blowing the game to the Colts and losing to the Jets earlier this season, there’s no mercy this time around. Look for Brady and Moss to explode, and the game to get a little chippy towards the end. (And for the record, I think that call to go for it on 4th and 2 was a pretty bad choice. Would Manning have driven down the field and scored anyways? Maybe, but make him earn it with an extra 40-50 yards in crunch time. I feel they handed the Colts that game. And it could cost them come playoff time when the seedings roll around.) Patriots 47, Jets 20.

San Diego (6-3) at Denver (6-3) +3.5
Denver a dog at home should be an easy pick, but hold on. Denver is officially on life support. If they couldn’t right the ship against the Redskins last week then there ain’t no ship left to be righted. Add to that (a) Kyle Orton has not practiced and (b) the Bolts are surging and I see a Bolts victory in the making San Diego wins and covers: Chargers 31 Broncos 20

That analysis is perfectly logical and makes complete sense. Which is why I’m going in the opposite direction. Just when we think we’ve got things figured out, it all flips around upside down. I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised to see the Broncos win in a blow out. (Of course, I wouldn’t be surprised to see Samichualus being dead on either. That’s the NFL – you never know.) Broncos 31, Chargers 30.

Philadelphia (5-4) at Chicago (4-5) +2.5
The Bears have lost 4 of their last 5 and really laid an egg against the 49rs. Since beating the snot out of the Giants, the Eagles have lost 2 straight. Now there’s no shame in losing to the Cowboys and Bolts (as the Eagles have) but this is a must win for them. For the Bears, the season is over and they know it, Lovie Smith has officially lost them, and Jay Cutler is currently persona non grata thanks to his 5 interception debacle against the Niners. The Eagles get it right this week: Eagles 34 Bears 17

I’m not sure I’d say the Bears are done just yet. This is one of those games between middle-of-the-pack teams that really could shape what the Wild Card race looks like heading into the season’s home stretch. There are 7 teams in the NFC right now that are 5-4 or 4-5. And two of those 5-4 teams would qualify for the Wild Card if the season ended today. This could be one of those year’s where an 8-8 team makes the playoffs. It really isn’t over for anybody unless you’re Detroit, Cleveland, Buffalo, Tampa, Oakland, St. Louis, or KC. Even Seattle and Washington are technically only 2 games out of a playoff spot at 3-6, and the Titans have looked good lately. I’m taking the home dog again. Bears 23, Eagles 20.

Tennessee (3-6) at Houston (5-4) -4.5
Houston comes off the bye and a tough loss to the Colts to face a Titans team that probably filled it’s highlight reel last week against the Bills. I guess by now our readers know how much I like teams coming off a bye so let’s be consistent. I’m taking Houston and the points. The Texans are a good team. They’ve won 3 of their last 4, they’re at home and they’re rested. The Titans have been up and down. Houston by at least a TD . Texans 27 Titans 20

Speaking of the Titans.. Holy crap, is Chris Johnson good? Forget about Peterson, this dude is the most explosive running back in the league right now. The dude has 16 rushes for over 20 yards. That basically means you can depend on him to bust a big one about twice a game. His average per carry is 6.4 yards. No wonder the Titans have looked good since putting Vince Young in. They’ve basically abandoned the passing game and let Johnson take over. Oh, and he’s 6 months younger than Peterson and has one fewer season of wear and tear on him. He’s the player I start a new franchise with, hands down. (Okay, maybe I’m a little biased because I have him on my fantasy team and he’s single-handedly won me several games this year. But still, he’s a beast.) The Texans are decent too. This should be a good game. Titans 31, Texans 29.

Dialog from the Samichlaus household...

Only at the Samichlaus household could this conversation possibly occur:

Samichlaus: “Hey hon, check out the blog. We’ve got the picks up and I did another entry on the Barnett thing”

Mrs. Samichlaus: “OK. Oh, by the way, (with a distinct sense of indignity) I knew what a “Dirty Sanchez” was. I knew what a “Dirty Sanchez” was when they were talking about it with that Screech guy from “Saved by the Bell”. And let me tell you, any woman who would f#*k Screech from “Saved by the Bell” deserves to get a “Dirty Sanchez”!”

Samichlaus: (laughing hysterically) “I think I know what my next blog post will be about…”

@NickBarnett, the final chapter (a tweet story)

The following exchange occured on Twitter earlier this week:

Nick Barnett after the loss to Tampa Bay: “Dissapointed!!! That's all I can say!!! But regardless how hard we will be beat up by media we will continue to work as hard as we must”

Samichlaus, after reading Nick’s tweet: “@NickBarnett Stop blaming the media, and stop talking about "working harder". The team gets outworked every week, and that means you. Do it.”

Nick Barnet “replies” to Samichlaus:

This was how it came to pass that Ol’ Samichlaus got Packers linebacker Nick Barnett’s attention. If you’re reading this then you probably have read my two previous posts about Nick’s twitter habits. I found it interesting that the young man was so sensitive, and such an approval seeker. He recently set up a poll on his website asking fans to name the most negative of all the Packers beat writers. Every week, after another brutal Packers loss, Nick likes to talk about working harder and doing what we’ve got to do, but after the loss to Tampa, Nick took it to a new level, calling out the media in the tweet mentioned above.

As a fan that roots for the team and spends his hard earned dollars supporting the team, I’d had enough, and let my frustrations vent out. My reply to @NickBarnett was no more and no less. I’m frustrated watching teams outwork the Packers every week, only to hear from their emotional and defensive leader that the team just needs to work harder. What in God’s name were you doing the week before? Regardless, Twitter has provided a level of casual access to players that fans have never had before and I took advantage of the technology.

So Nick Barnett has blocked me from receiving his tweets. I’m actually quite flattered. As I tweeted last night “it’s the first thing Nick’s blocked all season”.

He’s still tweeting and I can still read them. He tweeted this on Tuesday: “Good morning to all my great packer fans and to all the haters as well still have lots of love for you guys!!” I guess that was meant for me. The least he could have said was “and to all the haters that I’ve blocked from twitter because after having half the NFL up my ass during our pathetic performances, all I can handle up my ass these days is sunshine bullshit” but there is a 140 character limit on Twitter. In fact, here are the kinds of posts Nick receives on his Twitter page:

volcanicflower: @NickBarnett Good morning to you! Best of luck to you and the team on Sunday. Win or lose, I will always be a Packer fan.

jcl3202: @nickbarnett good morning to you as well!

tclansman: @NickBarnett good morning, good luck against the cowboys this week!!!! :) hope you have a big game

smoothnovelist: @NickBarnett Good morning sir. have a blessed day.

That last one’s my favorite. Nick is making several million dollars this year. Every day for him is blessed. Oh, and if Nick is truly Christian then he should forgive me. You know, turn the other cheek?

Well, as the kids of today like to say “it’s all good”. More than anything I think its way cool that I got under Nick’s skin. That’s more than I can say for his head coach or his defensive coordinator. And since this is Sports Blog Steves and I’m one of the Steves I can say whatever I want here. So to Nick Barnett and my beloved Packers: I am not a hater. I love the Packers and if you knew me then you’d know by every measurement you can imagine, my love for the Packers is off the charts. I rooted for the Packers when I was growing up in New York City in the 1970s, and I rooted for them through the awful 1980s. I was there at Super Bowl 31 when they beat New England. I’ve dragged my beautiful wife from the relative warmth of Virginia to Green Bay twice. So don’t you dare call me a hater.

In fact it’s the other way around: You have failed me. And by you I mean the Packers team and organization

You go out week after week and put on a lackluster performance. You are beaten by Minnesota and you are beaten by Tampa Bay. You do not protect your quarterback. You do not pressure the opponent’s quarterback. Your running backs are old and or slow: none of them could gain 100 yards against the 30th ranked rushing defense in the league. You are out hustled and out worked every week. Your head coach is clearly overmatched. He does not grasp the concept of rhythm and consistency in offense. His play calling is suspect, and he appears to have no ability to motivate. Your defensive coordinator has not gained the trust of his players. They have lost faith in the system and openly criticize him in the press. Your special teams play borders on laughable. You are the butt of every “short bus special“ joke out there. You have two playmakers on the team, Donald Driver and Charles Woodson: both are nearing the end of their storied careers. You have done nothing to attract free agents or veteran leadership, and have alienated the top talent in the league by your inept handling of one of the greatest players in franchise history. You are consistently the youngest team in the league, and your lack of discipline during games is indicative of it. Your quarterback often time is clueless and indecisive, but that stems from the lack of game plan or vision from your head coach. And to top it all off, your emotional leader is tweeting about the negative press after a loss to an 0-7 team. Excuse me, a 1–7 team.

Next year, God willing, Mike and Ted’s excellent adventure will be over. Maybe Jon Gruden will be coaching, or maybe Bill Cowher. Hell I’d even take Mike Holmgren back in a heartbeat, but that big pear shaped jackass Mike Sherman can stay wherever the hell he is. The bottom line is long after Nick Barnett retires and Mike McCarthy is tending bar in Pittsburgh, I will be a Packers fan, rooting for my team and wearing the $200.00 jersey my wife purchased for me from the Packers pro shop. You know the one she had made with my name on it? It’s the official game day jersey the players wear. The flag that flew over Lambeau field on my 40th birthday (another gift from my wife) will be in its case in my living room, right next to its certificate of authenticity. My Brett Favre autographed helmet (yet another gift from my wife) will still be on our bookshelf, right by my two most prized possessions: the footballs my wife stood out in the rain and cold at Lambeau field and had the players and coaches autograph as they left practice in 2005 and 2006. She got Aaron Rodgers and Greg Jennings, and Donald Lee and William Henderson who lives here in Richmond. And she got tons more.

And if the Packers turn this season around, beat Dallas this weekend, and make an unbelievable run for the playoffs, I’ll celebrate as I've never celebrated before. But I'm not here to pump sunshine up your ass idiot, that's what I pay you to do.