Slogan's Heros

Each week of the season the Green Bay Press Gazette held a contest to pick a slogan for the upcoming game. For example, this week’s winner Peggy Anderson of Bloomer, Wis came up with the clever “Rattle Seattle” and won. Anderson when asked how she came up with the slogan replied “The slogan … just popped into my head and I liked that it rhymed.” Anderson is a legend among the slogan writers, as she is the only two time winner this season. She also came up with last week’s winner, the equally clever “Jingle the Bears Bells”.

Other weeks featured slogans like “Demolish Detroit” (a clever alliteration) and “Stuff the Bengals” (a clever reference to taxidermy). The week Mrs. Samichlaus and I went to Green Bay the winning slogan was “We doo Packers Voodo” (sic), a clever reference to New Orleans’s Creole black magic sub culture.

I wondered if the Press Gazette was going to have a season ending slogan contest, some thing to sum up the Packers 2005 season in a clever sentence. Then I began to ponder that if they had such a contest, Peggy Anderson might pull off a season ending slogan hat trick. I decided it was time to act. My strategy is simple: submit a large amount of slogans that will overwhelm the judges with my creativity. I’m hoping that this approach will cause the judges to be so struck with admiration that Peggy Anderson’s entry will be overlooked.

So here’s a Samichlaus exclusive for our loyal SBS readers, my entries for the “Slogan of the Season” contest….if the Press Gazette decides to have one…

Peggy Anderson of Bloomer, WI. , the Brett Favre of Slogan Writing

“The 2005 Packers: fuggedaboudit”
“The 2005 Packers: We beat New Orleans”
“The 2005 Packers: It’s like ‘Titanic’, except there’s footballs”
“The 2005 Packers: We’re the New Jersey of the NFL”
“The 2005 Packers: More turnovers than your favorite bakery”
“The 2005 Packers: Our offensive line has more loose holes than a truckload of hookers”
“The 2005 Packers: A living tribute to the legacy that is Ray Scooter McLean” (editors note: Google him and select the Wikipedia link for a brief explanation)
“The 2005 Packers: Come see the NFL Europe All Stars”
“The 2005 Packers: Train wreck football at its finest”
“The 2005 Packers: More penalties than the ’76 Philadelphia Flyers”
“The 2005 Packers: Where B.J. Sander earns $230,000.00”
“The 2005 Packers: They’re as likely to win as the Washington Generals” (editors note: Google them and select the Wikipedia link as well)
“The 2005 Packers: ‘We’ll take the ball and we’re gonna score….NOT!’ “
“The 2005 Packers: Come marvel at the size of Mike Sherman’s ass”
“The 2005 Packers: They’ll leave you begging for the sweet relief of death”
“The 2005 Packers: They finally found something lower than whale shit”
“The 2005 Packers: See our star running back Ahman Green, err, Najeh Davenport, err, Tony Fisher, err, Samkon Gado, err, err, who the hell is Noah Herron?”
“The 2005 Packers: I want my mommy...WAAAAHHHHHHH”
“The 2005 Packers: As bland as English cooking”
“The 2005 Packers: It’s a mammogram and a prostate exam all rolled into one”
“The 2005 Packers: Here’s your chance to move up on the season ticket waiting list”
“The 2005 Packers: It was a mistake, we made a mistake. We'll just pretend it never happened. You go back to your family and I'll go back to mine, and we'll never speak of this to anyone”

If you'd like to see this year's weekly winners along with a clever cartoon drawn by the Green Bay Press Gazette's resident artist, copy this link into your browser because 'Ol Samichlaus doesn't know how to add a fucking hyperlink... nevermind, I just figured it out!

http://www.packersnews.com/topics/slogans/index.shtml