Some advice from Zaphoid Beeblebrox

The first page of the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy offers two simple words of advice for intergalactic traveler: “Don’t Panic”. Yesterday’s loss to the Cleveland Browns, the loss to the lowly Cleveland Browns, the loss to the lowly Cleveland Browns at home, the loss to the lowly Cleveland Browns at home on Reggie White day has sent waves of panic through the Packer Press. Packer fans aren’t sure where to lay the blame. Many want to fire Mike Sherman while others want to fire Mike Sherman, but ol’ Samichlaus doesn’t see it that way. My advice to all Packer fans is simply DON’T PANIC.

However, Patriots fans…..

Week one saw the Packers vaunted offense muster up a whopping three points while losing Javon Walker for the season with a torn ACL. But week one also saw a spirited performance by the much maligned defense who played a short field most of the afternoon and gave up 17 points. Week two was a performance right out of last season. The defense gave up two huge plays that accounted for 14 points, and I swear if I didn’t know any better I saw the ghost of Bob Slowik roaming the sidelines calling the defensive formations. Was it a surprise to anyone that the two touchdowns of 60 and 80 yards came on all out blitzes?

The Packers actually out played Cleveland in several key areas, and they dominated the second half. Take a look at two key statistics:

Time of possession: Packers 35:11 Browns 24:49
First downs: Packers 27 Browns 19

Now, you don’t have to remind me that the only statistic that counts is the final score. The Packers need to play 60 minutes of football, they need to dominate from start to finish, but they are a young team. They are learning a new defense. Their offensive line is diminished. And Brett isn’t getting any younger. But this team will get better as the season goes on. The first four games, I’m not too worried about. The last four will define this season.

Notes from the game:

Yesterday’s spread featured home made deep dish pizza. The crust was made from “Krusteaz low carb bread mix” and the sauce was provided by a co-worker who wanted my expert opinion. Even Karen enjoyed it, though she poked the pepperoni slices off.

The Reggie White tribute was touching though we only saw about a minute of it. During the fourth quarter with the Packers down two, the defense needed a third down stop. The crowd, as if trying to conjure up the spirit of Reggie White began chanting “Reggie... Reggie... Reggie…” in hopes of inspiring the lackadaisical defense to rise to the occasion. I was moved to tears. The defense responded by giving up a 12 yard completion for a first down.

As former Wolverine Braylon Edwards broke an 80 yard touchdown I thought of my friend St. Ides. Then I thought about Notre Dame whooping the Wolverines asses last week and I felt better.

The Confederate Packers, much like the real Packers played well enough to lose. Week two was a squeaker, but I was beaten by St. Ides’s brother, the great hockey legend Dennis Potvin. (Karen honey, ask me and I’ll explain the joke). This brings the family score to St. Ides family 2, Samichlaus family zipperoni. Next week we face some dude named McBride, which sounds like something I could order at a McDonalds in Thailand. His team has T.O. My team has Robert Ferguson. Looks like another loss for my team.

That’s all for now….

Who said the Cats would beat the Pats?