Week 17 Picks (Sort of)....

So we're going into the final regular season weekend of the season. And there's a few exciting sub-plots! (And a ton of totally meaningless games...) So considering that I had a relatively non-existent work week in which to write picks, we'll just touch on a few of the more interesting aspects...

Like several teams that have their playoff seeds locked in, you can say we here at SBS are also going to play the first quarter and making sure we're healthy for the playoffs. So I'll keep this short and to the point...

The Patriots have a chance to go 16-0 at the Meadowlands this Saturday night. The Pats are locked in as the #1 AFC seed. But that hasn't stopped Belichick from playing his starters in the past. The Giants are locked into the #5 seed in the NFC and will go to Tampa Bay for the first round. The Giants are talking some smack, particularly about Brady. And for all of Coughlin's talk that he'll play his starters and try to win, I'm not sure I buy it. Hell, even if the Giants WERE trying to win, they probably couldn't. I think the Pats put up a big lead, Brady breaks Manning's single-season TD record, and we see no major injuries. For all the hype that the "Do we rest our starters?" storyline gets during the final weeks every single year, when was the last time a key player actually DID get hurt in a meaningless game that cost his team a deep run into the playoffs? I sure as hell cannot think of an example. (Which means I probably just jinxed it and it will happen this weekend.)

Speaking of resting players, we have two interesting situations for the final playoff spots in both the AFC and NFC...

In the AFC, if the Titans win on Sunday night, they're in. They play a Colts team that figures to be resting most of their starters. So it SHOULD be a gimme, right?

If the Titans somehow lose to the backup Colts, then the Browns can sneak in with a win over the Niners in Cleveland. The Browns really blew it last week by not knocking off the woeful Bengals. If they beat San Fran (and they should), they'll have to sit around and watch the Sunday Night game on NBC to see their fate. I wonder if NBC will figure out a way to get a live feed of Browns players watching the game to see their reaction?

The NFC is a very similar situation. The Redskins need to win to get in. They play the Cowboys in DC, and Dallas will likely be playing mostly backups as well, since they've locked up the #1 NFC seed. Again, the Redskins SHOULD win. But this is the NFL, so who knows.

Waiting in the wings are the Vikings. Who could have wrapped up a playoff spot by beating the Skins in Minny last weekend. They couldn't get it done. (Which I predicted correctly, by the way.) The Vikes have to win in Denver this week to stay alive. Which is a pretty tall order.

The longshot in the NFC are the Saints, who are still mathematically alive. If both the Skins and Vikings lose, and the Saints win in Chicago, they can snatch away that #6 spot. Not imposible, but improbable.

My best guess is the Skins win and are in, and somehow the Titans manage to choke it away, giving the Browns the final AFC spot.

And then next week we can talk playoffs, woohoo! One little sneak peek tidbit for Samichlaus regarding the playoffs: with the Seahawks locked in at #3 and the Packers locked in at #2, that means Seattle will visit Green Bay in round two if Seattle doesn't choke at home in the first round. (A distinct possibility of course.) Last time we saw Seattle in Green Bay for a playoff game, it was 4 years ago, and Matt Hasselbeck was bravely declaring "We'll take the ball and we're going to score!" after winning the OT coin toss. And them promptly throwing a pick six to Al Harris to lose the game. That was Hasselbeck's first ever playoff start. Seattle hasn't missed the playoffs since, and are 3-3. I can't look past the first round opponent, but I think that'd be a great game.

Week 16 Picks (Almost Playoff Time!)

Two weeks left, and not a whole lot of drama. 7 of the 8 divisions are wrapped up. And there's only about 8 or so teams vying for the 4 wild card spots both conferences (with the Giants and Browns having to choke totally to lose 2 of those...)

Boy, I am so glad I checked the blog this morning! First off, was it me or did Dallas get every significant call last night? I had that sick feeling come over me while watching the game, you know the one? The same one I had after that Seattle - Pittsburgh Super Bowl? Thank goodness there's the national media out there to tell me I'm a paranoid lunatic....

Anyways, here we go!

Last Week:
Samichlaus: 7-8
St. Ides: 6-9

Season:
St. Ides: 57-61
Samichlaus: 46-72

PANTHERS +10.5 over Cowboys
Don't look now, but a sore thumb and Jessica Simpson are destroying the Cowboys season! The Panthers actually looked halfway decent last week against Seattle. I'll take 10 points at home, thank you very much. Cowboys 24, Panthers 23.

I can't comment on this one but if anyone cares I would have taken the Panthers and the points.

BILLS +2.5 over Giants
Giants are in a bit of trouble. Shockey is gone for the season. They should have locked up a playoff spot by now, but they haven't. Eli is inconsistent. I would LOVE to have the Giants come to Seattle in the first round. Which means Seattle stays at #3 and the Giants fall to #6. A loss here helps that along. Bills 17, Giants 13.

Agreed. Add to that the fact that the Bills are tough at home, and play tough every week. Besides, it's time for the yearly December swoon of any Coughlin coached team. I like the Bills to win outright in a low scoring game. Bills 17 Giants 10

SAINTS -3.5 over Eagles
Saints are fighting for their playoff lives. And while the Eagles have shown some fight recently, I like the Saints in this one. Saints 23, Eagles 17.

The rule of the more desperate team applies. The Saints need this game more than the Eagles, and will win easy at home. Saints 27 Eagles 13

BEARS +8.5 over Packers
If you would have told anyone that the Bears would be a 9 point underdog to the Packers in Chicago on week 16, people would have thought you were nuts. Well, here we are. Bears defense kinda blows, their offense is horrendous, and the Packers could very well still grab home field advantage throughout the NFC playoffs if they pass the Cowboys in the next two weeks. Packers 20, Bears 13.

That's a lot of points but I'll take the Packers to cover. The Pack has won 16 of their last 17 in Illinois, and are looking to avenge one of their two losses. Favre always plays well in Soldier Field. The Pack will put up 30 easy, but outside of Devon Hester and Brian Urlacher, who is going to score for Chicago? Packers 31 Bears 10

Chiefs +4.5 over LIONS
Remember when the Lions were 6-2? It was only 6 weeks ago. Now they're 6-8. Where's your God now, Jon Kitna? Lions 20, Chiefs 17.

Is Kitna one of those "Thank you Jesus" guys? I had no idea! After the loss to the Cowboys it all fell apart for Detroit. I like the Chiefs as well, but I'll say they win outright. Chiefs 34 Lions 20

Texans +7.5 over COLTS
The Texans have shown some spirit lately. Oddly enough, a lot of that spark has come from backup QB Sage Rosenfels and former #1 pick Mario Williams. Who now looks like a better choice than both Reggie Bush and Vince Young. Colts 26, Texans 20.

A lot of very smart people are taking the Texans this week, but I don't see it. Colts at home usually covers and Sage Rosenfels (who gets second place in the "Most ethnic sounding name" catagory to Vinny Testaverde) ain't all that. Colts 34 Texans 17


Browns -2.5 over BENGALS
I like what the Browns have done. I have much love for their offense. Meanwhile, the Bengals suck. And there's some talk that the egos of Ocho Cinco and TJ Whosyourmama is starting to wear thin in the Cinci locker room. Browns 31, Bengals 17.

If you told me the Browns would have the better record at this stage of the season say, last September, I'd have recommended therapy. Meanwhile I agree with St. Ides's sentiment, I like what the Browns have done as well. Browns 24 Bengals 21

Raiders +12.5 over JAGUARS
The Raiders stuck in there against the Colts last week. The Jags look good, but it seems they're pretty much locked into the #5 seed, so not a whole lot to play for. Jaguars 23, Raiders 13.

That's a lot of lettuce 12.5, but I'm going to take it only because this game is at Jacksonville. The Jags may try to build a little playoff momentum so lets go Jags 34 Raider 17

Falcons +10.5 over CARDINALS
*Sniff sniff* What's that smell? Yep, it's the Stinker of the Week! Cardinals actually seemed like they might threaten for a playoff spot until they got hit hard with injuries. Oh well, that's life in the NFL. Cardinals 20, Falcons 10.

I got burned by the Falcons last week who I swore would rise up for Emmit Thomas. Wrong again. Can the Cardinals beat anyone by 10.5? Who cares. Cardinals 24 Falcons 10

Bucanneers -6.5 over NINERS
Bucs can still beat out Seattle for the #3 seed. Which may mean the difference between playing the Giants instead of the Vikings. Niners got a little lift by some rookie QB last week. But he wasn't playing the Tampa Bay D. Bucs 20, Niners 6.

I like the Bucs too, in fact they're my sleeper team in the playoffs. The Niners at home might get a few points, but I stll think the Bucs win by a TD. Bucs 24 Niners 13

Dolphins +21.5 over PATRIOTS
I'm not giving any more huge 20-point spreads any more this season. Not when the Pats game is so dependent on the long ball, the temperature is dropping, and there's a threat of snow every weekend. Pats 27, Fins 9.

This game isn't any different than last weeks game. Pats win, but not by 22. Pats 24 Dolphins 7

TITANS -8.5 over Jets
Titans are still alive! (Not much more to add here other than the Jets blow.) Titans 27, Jets 16.

I will add one comment: the Jets need a QB who has at least as strong an arm as St. Ides, and it ain't Chad Pennington. When Chad was a bit younger he had just enough of an arm to get by, but not anymore. I saw a good part of that Pats game and thought "this guy is a joke". Titans 24 Jets 10

Ravens +8.5 over SEAHAWKS
After last week's debacle against the Panthers and a rookie QB, the Seahawks get to face another rookie QB in former Heisman winner Troy Smith. Let's just say it only takes one horrible week to destroy any confidence I had in this team. Seahawks 24, Ravens 20.

I feel you pain brother. After watching the Panthers last night I couldn't help but wonder what the living fuck was wrong with Seattle last week? However, I'm going the other way. I like Seattle by 10. Seattle 34 Ravens 17

Redskins +6.5 over VIKINGS
This line is WAY too high. The Vikings have gotten back in the playoff hunt against crappy teams. The Redskins are not a crappy team. And with a win, I believe the Skins jump the Vikes for the final NFC Wild Card spot. YOu've got to believe there's a lot of emotion and unity on Washington right now given the whole Sean Taylor tragedy. I'll take the Skins to win fairly easily. Redskins 23, Vikings 10.

I like the Skins too. I'm not convinced they can win this game outright, but St. Ides is correct: the Skins are playing at an emotional fever pitch. I hope they can win... I like that team. Vikings 27 Redskins 24

Broncos +8.5 over CHARGERS
You would have thunk this game might mean something with regards to the AFC West division title. Or at least a wild card berth for one of the teams. It doesn't. Chargers 31, Broncos 24.

San Diego has played good football lately, I think. The truth is I really haven't followed either of these teams all that close, well except for the occasional shot of LT having a little hissy fit. That stuff torques me off. I'll take the Chargers: Chargers 31 Broncos 20

Thoughts On The Juice! (No, not OJ...)

Okay, so the steroid report came out and highlighted the names of several current and former players as users. The big names? Roger Clemens, Miguel Tejada, Barry Bonds (big surprise there), Andy Pettitte, Gary Sheffield, and Eric Gagne. I think most people will accept the findings in the report and believe that the people named did take steroids. Although the evidence from one name to another does vary to some degree. For example, some of the players left actual paper trails - cashed checks, receipts, etc. While others were fingered by verbal testimony of a single person. It was pretty detailed and convincing verbal testimony (ie, "I injected Roger Clemens in the butt with steroids cause he asked me to."), but the difference should be noted. Especially since if this were an actual trial, the word of a single person probably wouldn't be nearly enough to convict a person.

Anyways, differences in just how convincing the evidence is on a case-by-case basis, lets look at a few different things...

First of all, I know and you know that there are TONS of other players out there who used steroids who are NOT named in the report. The Player's Association totally hand-cuffed the investigation by telling the players not to cooperate at all. Only one player cooperated (Jason Giambi) and that was because the moron pretty much had admitted he used steroids, and the commissioner threatened to suspend him if he didn't answer their questions. That means the only sources they had were trainers and suppliers... Who were only squealing if they had already been busted themselves and could save their own ass.

Someone called into the Mike and the Mad Dog the other day and claimed to know one of the big-name trainer guys who was supplying information for the report. He basically said that the guy never would have named names if he hadn't been ratted out first. The way the caller explained it (and it sounded legitimate - it almost sounded like Mike and Russo had spoken to this guy before, cause they didn't question him one bit), he said that one of the players got busted by the Feds for possession and ratted out the trainer as the supplier. Once the trainer was ratted out, he was like "Eff this. If these bastards ratted me out, I'm not going to protect them," and proceeded to name names. That sort of odd "Who's willing to rat out who" merry-go-round seems to have been the source for most of the names.

Which leads me back to my first point - there's a ton of people out there who realize that you don't rat people out, no matter what the legal consequences may be. (Hell, the BALCO guy spent several months in prison because he refused to testify against Bonds.) For the dozen or so recognizable names in the report because some people decided to sing like a canary, there are dozens more who haven't been exposed because people have refused to rat them out.

It'll be interesting to see if more arrests, busts, paper trails, investigations or whatever will eventually reveal some more names. Because we know they're out there.

So now my next question.. how does this effect the Hall of Fame status of these players? I think it's pretty safe to assume that anybody who knows anything about sports would say Bonds and Clemens have had Hall of Fame careers. Tejada and Pettitte are probably borderline, but leaning more on the outside looking in at this point I think. But what about former players Rafael Palmeiro and Mark McGwire? (Palmeiro's name appears in the report. McGwire's does not.)

Some moron writer who actually has a Hall of Fame vote called in to Mike and the Mad Dog yesterday. He said that he'd still vote for Clemens and Bonds, but wouldn't vote for McGwire and Palmeiro. His explanation wasn't that he thought McGwire and Palmeiro weren't worthy based on their careers. But he said that McGwire and Palmeiro "needed the steroids more" than Clemens and Bonds. What the hell does that mean? That makes no sense. That's like he's almost trying to measure just what kind of impact the steroids had for each player, which is completely impossible. There's no way in hell you can say that McGwire hit all those home runs because of the steroids, but Bonds would have done it even without them. I can't believe he didn't get reamed for saying that. The fact of the matter is that if a baseball player used steroids, they cheated. Period. Case closed. You cannot measure how much the steroids helped them. You cannot say it helped one person more than another. That's ludicrous.

So now, what does baseball do? While the Mitchell guy recommended no punishment be taken against those named in the report, Selig said that'll be decided by him on a case-by-case basis. I don't see him suspending anybody based on this. The bottom line is that there are no failed drug tests. (Of course, that's mostly because drug tests weren't given during the period in question.) What will the Hall of Fame voters do? They punished McGwire last year by not voting him in, though there was some speculation it was just to prove a point, and he'd get in the following year. If they take the hard stance and not vote in anybody that's been linked to steroids, does that mean Bonds and Clemens never get in? Well, then what happens if someone gets in... let’s say Sammy Sosa, just to pick a random player who should get in... What happens if Sammy Sosa makes it to Cooperstown, and then 5 years later, another drug company gets raided and busted, and suddenly the feds have a stack of papers linking Sosa to steroids. Can they boot someone out of the Hall of Fame who are already in? Has that ever happened? And if not, then how can you possibly still keep Bonds and Clemens out?

The fact of the matter is we don't truly know who used steroids and who didn't. The whole era has been tainted. It needs to be recorded as such. Individual players who got unlucky enough to have their trainers snitch on them shouldn't be singled out as the only guilty parties. And, like it or not, the Hall of Fame voters need to treat everyone the same - either they all get in, or they all stay out.

Week 13 Picks! (Steroid free) (now with extra carbohydrates!)

We're into the home stretch! And the holiday season! Which means lots of food and booze, and hopefully a slow enough work environment that you'll be seeing weekly picks from here through the Pro Bowl. No promises though. (I also plan on writing a little something about the baseball steroids thing, but figured the picks were more important right now.)

With 3 weeks left, 5 of the 12 playoff spots have been clinched. Tampa Bay is looking pretty good for the NFC South. The Giants are looking pretty good for the 1st NFC Wild Card spot. The Jaguars look pretty set as an AFC Wild Card. The Steelers have a 1 game lead and the tie-breaker over the Browns for the AFC North. And the Chargers would have to totally collapse to lose the AFC West. So really, there's not a whole lot of spots left up for grabs. It's more like 10 of the 12 spots are decided. Though the spots that ARE available have a lot of teams in the hunt.

OK, we're back. OJ is under arrest, Vick is in prison, and the Packers have clinched the NFC Central. Sorry I've got to rush through these but I do have a few things to take care of...

Last Time:
St. Ides: 9-7
Samichlaus: 8-8

Overall:
St. Ides: 51-52
Samichlaus: 39-64

Bengals -8.5 over NINERS
The Bengals are showing a little bit of life. While the Niners are not. There's some bad stuff going on in San Fran, with Alex Smith accusing Mike Nolan of ruining his career and trying to undermine his rep with teammates by questioning his toughness not playing through (what's been proven to be a pretty serious) injury. At this point in the season, I think it's safe to throw the "take the home dogs" strategy out the window. In the pool me and my dad are in, we're both near the bottom of the pack with a pedestrian 29-41 record. (Though my dad has been trying to lose on purpose lately.. for the last place booby prize.. and I've still been trying to win...) Anyways, Niners blow. Bengals 27, Niners 16.

Day after day the selection of Alex Smith over Aaron Rodgers is looking like a huge mistake. Did anyone other than me notice how good Rodgers looked against the Cowboys? Anyway, I like the Bengals, but 8.5 is a lot to give so I'm taking the Niners and the points. Bengals 24 Niners 21

SAINTS -3.5 over Cardinals
Wow, this game actually has playoff ramnifications. Both teams are in the hunt for the final NFC Wild Card spot. The Saints are getting just a little hot and had a big win over the Falcons on Monday night. The Cardinals got absolutely dominated by Seattle with the NFC West at stake. To be fair, the Cardinals have been hit by injuries pretty badly, especially in their secondary. Which means Drew Brees and company should have a field day. Oh, and wouldn't it be somewhat ironic if the Saints go on a nice winning streak here and make the playoffs without Reggie Bush? Saints 31, Cardinals 20.

Yes it would. Reggie Bush is a good running back, but he's no Samkon Gado. I like the Saints to win easy... Saints 34 Cardinals 17

Seahawks -7.5 over PANTHERS
To answer Anonymous's recent question, it's Hasselbeck lately. He's looked awesome since Seattle has gone to a pass-happy attack, mostly due to an ineffective running game behind a shaking run-blocking offensive line. Hasselbeck has been making all the right decisions, has made the throws he's had to, and has been outsmarting opposing defenses by audibling very well at the line. (Including an interesting matchup against Urlacher a few weeks ago where both were exchanging audibles... I have to say, Hasselbeck came out ahead on most of those plays.) Another reason to like Hasselbeck is his personality. He's a pretty funny guy from all accounts, doesn't take himself too seriously, yet commands respect and inspires his teammates in the huddle when it matters. Here's a good clip that captures his personality perfectly. (And he talks about his days in Green Bay, so that's a reason for Samichlaus to actually watch it.)

Anyways, while Hasselbeck gets the offense going (and if he doesn't make the Pro Bowl, it'll be a travesty), the defense has been stepping up. This past weekend, underrated CB Marcus Trufant had 3 picks. The week before, Lofa Tatupu had 3. And free agent acquisition Patrick Kerney leads the league in sacks. Yes, you read that right. A Seahawk leads the league in sacks. The run defense has been solid, the pass defense has been even better. Thanks largely in part due to new assistant head coach/secondary coach Jim Mora and having two veteran safeties who know not to get beat deep. If Seattle doesn't scare the living bajeezus out of the other NFC playoff teams, they should. This team is two plays away from being 11-2. And as poorly as they played the first half of the season, is as good as they're playing now.

Okay, so I'm rambling a bit now.. As for this game... Seattle sometimes struggles getting started in 1pm games, but the Panthers offense is bad enough that it shouldn't matter. They shut down Steve Smith in the playoffs a few years ago when they had a decent QB and a running game. With neither of those going for them now, he'll have little impact. Seahawks 23, Panthers 10.

That's a great clip! There's one out there where he talks about getting drafted by Green Bay and how excited he was to go and play with Brett Favre. He ends it by saying something like "... so I figured it was time to take the poster of him hanging on my wall down". If I can find it, I'll post it. Meanwhile, what you said. Seattle 27 Panthers 13

Falcons +11.5 over BUCANNEERS
With playoff positioning at stake and a chance to wrap up the NFC South, the Bucs laid an egg last week against the Texans. Jeff Garcia has sat out two games with back problems, so that's not good. The Falcons pretty much stink, and now their head coach jumped ship before even finishing his first year. Star CB DeAngelo Hall was caught telling NO coach Sean Payton he wants to play for him DURING last week's game. Atlanta is pretty much in shambles. Which means take the points, cause nothing makes sense in the NFL. Bucs 23, Falcons 14.

The Falcons are in a state of turmoil, and the question is do they rise to the occasion and play for interim head coach Emmit Thomas? I'm going with yes. The Bucs will win, but in a close game. Bucs 24 Falcons 21

BROWNS -5.5 over Bills
Look! Another game that means something late in the season between two teams that have sucked a lot lately! I'm impressed with how resilient the Bills have been, especially since they've had some serious injuries and can't decide on a starting QB. But I've been even more impressed with the Browns and Dereck Anderson, who I think I even made a joke about in one of our first picks columns this season. Well, he's looked awesome. And now the Browns might find themselves in the same tricky situation the Chargers did a few years ago - a lower drafted QB actually playing well for them with a top draft pick QB with high expectations (and a phat contract) sitting on the bench. So far, it looks like the Chargers might have made the wrong move by letting Brees get away and keeping Rivers. Now the Browns have to figure out what to do between Derek Anderson and Brady Quinn. Good luck! (Oh, and former Wolverine Braylon Edwards has had a Pro Bowl caliber year as well.) Browns 27, Bills 20.

I think they trade Quinn to Miami for a second round pick. Unless Miami plans on choosing a QB... who's the hot QB in the draft this year anyways? Sunday's game time weather: Snow and Wind. So the question is, who can run the ball better? I'll take the Bills and Marshawn Lynch for the upset. Bills 17 Browns 10

PATRIOTS -23.5 over Jets
I think the spread is even higher now, but that's what it's listed as in my pool, which is what I usually pull these spreads from. The Revenge Bowl! Now accusations are flying back and forth that the Jets might have been caught videotaping the Pats signals last year. It's all pretty ridiculous. I'm not even going to spend time on the whole revenge thing cause you can read about it on every other website. I'll just say this is going to be ugly, and the after-game handshake should be interesting. Patriots 52, Jets 16.

I really think the Jets pride will keep this game closer than people think. But if St. Ides is right, look for Mangenius to sucker punch Belichick on the way out. Pats 37 Jets 20

Ravens -3.5 over DOLPHINS
Shouldn't the spread by higher than this? An 0-13 team against a team that almost knocked off the Pats? Yes, the Ravens got spanked last week by the Colts, but the Dolphins offense isn't exactly as explosive. And Kyle Boller actually looked like an NFL QB a couple weeks ago. I don't see the Fins winning this year... Ravens 20, Fins 10.

The great John Beck experiment is over in Miami. This team has no coach, no front office, and no players of any worth. No wonder my father in law hates the holidays. Ravens 27 Dolphins 10

CHIEFS +3.5 over Titans
Titans may have choked away their playoff hopes by blowing a decent lead against the Chargers last week and losing in OT. Chiefs aren't that bad, but Herm Edwards still blows as a coach. They're still kinda tough at home though, and Vince Young hasn't been very good for most of this year. I'm still not entirely sure how the Titans have won as many games as they have. Decent running game and defense I guess... Chiefs 20, Titans 17.

Hell, I can't figure out how the Packers have won so many games this year. Chiefs are getting 3.5... hmm, I don't know. I'm going with Tennesee. Just cause I can. Tennesee 30 Chiefs 20

Jaguars +3.5 over STEELERS
I actually think the Jaguars are a decent team. Took them awhile to convince me, but call me convinced. The Steelers are decent too. These teams could very well meet in the first round of the playoffs. I'll take the points. Steelers 23, Jags 20.

Steelers at home... they're going to get at least 3 points off of ref calls. That leaves a half a point to cover, and I just don't think it's a problem. Steelers 24 Jags 17

RAMS +9.5 over Packers
The Packers are due for a letdown game or two, right? Especially since they are pretty much locked into the #2 seed. They're 1 game behind the Cowboys for #1 (but lose the head-to-head tie-breaker, so it's really like 2 games). And 2 games ahead of Seattle (but would lose the conference record tie-breaker, so yeah, it's 2 games). Favre doesn't really have a great history in domes, and the Rams can still be frisky at times. I expect the Packers to pretty much win easily, but a doodoo time TD could keep the Rams within 10. Packers 30, Rams 24.

I agree with this analysis completely. I will say that the Packers looked real good against the Raiders, better than I expected. The D was flying all over the field, and nearly pitched a shutout. If the Packers have this game put away early, look for the second string to come in and finish. Meanwhile, Mark Bulger returns to the Rams just to make it interesting. Packers 34 Rams 27

Colts -10.5 over RAIDERS
Okay, I take back what I said towards the beginning of the season about the Raiders surprising people. They're still pretty bad. If the Colts dismantled the Ravens so easily, I'll lay the points. Colts 31, Raiders 13.

The Raiders are a joke. If the Pack can win by 31 at home, the Colts win by at least 20 on the road. Colts 31 Raiders 10


Lions +10.5 over CHARGERS
Even after choking away that game against the Cowboys, the Lions are still right in the thick of the hunt for the final NFC playoff spot. There's some trouble brewing in SD with Tomlison giving Phillip Rivers the cold shoulder last week on the sidelines while he was playing poorly. It would have been interesting to see how that developed had the Chargers not come back to win. I wouldn't be surprised to see them lose outright this week. So I'll happily take 10 points. Lions 26, Chargers 24.

I just have to say this: Tomlinson is a big wussy. I love his story, and how he made it to the NFL, but he reminds me of a guy that used to play for the Mets named Greg Jefferies. Grow the fuck up, will you? Another million dollar talent with a five cent emotional makeup. I like the Lions and the points. Chargers 34 Lions 27

Eagles +10.5 over COWBOYS
Ugh. I'm so disgusted by the Cowboys and the Romo love-fest I can't even comment on this game. Eagles 26, Cowboys 24.

Me too... but boy, that Romo is something huh? tee hee hee. The Eagles will keep it real close... Cowboys 27 Eagles 24


Redskins +4.5 over GIANTS
Does Eli Manning really scare any team going into the playoffs? I didn't think so. The Skins are still alive for the final Wild Card spot as well. Redskins 23, Giants 20.

Apply the rule of the more desperate team, and the Redskins win. The game means more to them. Eli might not scare anybody, but I'll bet Jason Campbell has nightmares about Osi Umenyiora... Skins 24 Giants 21

Bears +9.5 over VIKINGS
Just as everybody is sucking Adrian Peterson's peepee almost as much as Tony Romo's, he has 14 carries for 3 yards (a whopping 0.2 yards per carry) against the Niners last week. Of course, Chester Taylor ripped off an 84-yard TD run and the Niners suck enough that the Vikings still won and currently hold the #6 seed in the NFC if the season ended today. Whether or not the Vikes (who are pretty much one-dimensional on both sides of the ball) scare anybody going into the playoffs is debatable, but I'm thinking they'll stumble and not make it. The Bears get a big chance to play spoiler here, and their defense still has enough pride to get amped up to stop Peterson. Bears 20, Vikes 12.

I absloutely agree. The Bears will win this game by virtue of defense and special teams. I see a low scoring loss for the Vikes, who will not make the playoffs. Bears 20 Vikes 10 (Samichlaus LOVES the under @ 43)

Blizzards and Blogging

First of all, to my dear friend Anonymous who never fails to take full advantage of St. Ides and my policy of not editing user comments, we unequivically do not suck. True, our predictions are often times a bit off and yes we do lapse in our committment to this blog from time to time, but we absolutely do not suck. I poke, and St. Ides licks like a rabid lizard. And second of all, you mentioned that your sister attended Union College. Her name isn't Brianna is it? Because I swear to the good Christ if I banged your sister in '93 I'm never going to live this down.



There's a blizzard in Albany today, but I was lucky enough to catch the last flight out... to Cincinnati. So I figure this is a good time to blog about some of the things that have transpired over the last several weeks. And it has nothing to do with the fact that Anonymous called us out. No no no.

The Packers lost to the Cowboys on a Thursday night game, and make no mistake about it, the better team won. The Packers were undiciplined and unruly, played with a poor game plan, were beaten on both sides of the ball, and lost by 10. It should have been a lot worse, except for the brilliant play of Aaron Rogers who brought the Packers within one before their defense completed its self distruction. This was by far their worst game of the year... and they only lost by 10. To paraphrase Jim Carrey in "Dumb and Dumber" I'm telling you there is a chance.

The Patriots continue to roll over the league, and I have to say I actually took pleasure in their victory over the Steelers. Now, I don't think I'm alone in the sentement here but there's a team that's used to getting all the big calls. The Pats gave 'em and old fashioned ass whoopin', and a well deserved one at that. I don't even want to venture a guess as to what they're going to do to the Jets this weekend. One last thought: I saw the Ravens game. The Ravens played their asses off, and lost fair and square. Sometimes the better team just wins.

Seattle is in the playoffs. St. Ides? Are you out there?

Les Miles isn't going to coach Michigan next year... is he?

The steroid report came out today, and as I expected the New York Yankees are a bunch of juiced up losers. Roger Clemens and Andy Pettit should come as no surprise to anyone who follows the game. Both these guys had careers on the downswing and suddenly both these guys rediscovered 5 mph on their fastballs. Coincidence? My advice to them is get a Bowflex like Brett Favre did... come to think of it, he looks a bit sprity this season...

So what do I know?

So, as of 3:00 the Packers are dominating their game while the Eagles are in a friggin dogfight. That Packer pick is looking mighty good. Meawhile the Panthers just scored, and the receiver (someone named Christian Fauria) celebrated like the Cats had the lead or something. I thought that was particularly classless, but then I found out he used to play for the Patriots and it all made sense.

Week, uhh, 11? 10? Shit, who cares, at least there are some picks

If you are expecting me to put the kind of effort St. Ides does putting these picks together fuggedaboudit. I don't have the time or inclination to research how well we did two weeks ago, nor do I care to color code this. Rather, I will provide our rabid reader base with exactly what they've been clamoring for: football picks. And if you want to thank anyone, you can thank Delta Airlines who have graciously stranded me in Albany Airport. We'll do a little different format this week: Visitor listed first, with the line against the home team. That's how USA Today does it so that's how I'm doing it. Any questions?

Holy poop, I'm a slacker. I blame work, the Seahawks maddeningly inconsistent season, and Anonymous for my lack of posts. Oh, and Barry Bonds. That lying fuck.

Last Time:
Samichlaus: 8-6
St. Ides: 6-8

Overall:
St. Ides: 42-45
Samichlaus: 31-56

Let's get to it...

Arizona @ Cincinatti (-3)
I like the Bengals at home, even though the Cards have been playing well as of late. Not sure why, but I think the Bengals have played far below their potential and will finally put together a solid performance
Bengals 27 Cardinals 21

Wow, look at this. I can now get away with a simple "I agree with him." Maybe I should let him pick first more often! The Cards are long overdue for a stinker, and on the road in Cinci seems like as good a place as any. Bengals 28, Cards 20.

Carolina @ Green Bay (-10)
That's a lot of points for the young Packers, who generally win their games by depending on some last minute heroics by Brett Favre. Last week's game was one for the ages but with the short week coming up I see a pre-Thanksgiving turkey for the green and gold. They'll win, but it will be closer than it should.
Packers 24 Cats 20

I took the Vikings plus a bunch of points last week, and the Packers knocked out Adrian Peterson and shut them out. I predict more of the same against a struggling Panthers offense. And check this out.. Combined age of the QBs in this game (Favre and Vinny): 82. Combined age of the starting QBs Alex Smith, Vince Young, and Jay Cutler: 71. (I tried desperately to find some rookie QBs around age 21 so I could squeeze 4 combined in totaling under 82, but the fact is just about every young QB is at least 23 or 24... ) Packers 23, Panthers 6.

Cleveland @ Baltimore (+2)
The old "home dog". We all know how my adopted dad, the senior St. Ides feels about this, but I'm going to go against my by-proxy old man. I like this Anderson kid too much and the Ravens have dissapointed all season. I'm seeing at least a field goal separating these two. Forgive me father...
Cleveland 20 Baltimore 17

I agree on this one. And for the record, in the pool I'm in with my dad this year, he's doing pretty horrible. So while his wisdom might make sense on a lot of levels, the NFL is just too damn predictable to not be flexible on certain points. Really the Browns should have beaten the Steelers last week. And the Ravens are a lot worse than the Steelers. Browns 23, Ravens 13.

Kansas City @ Indianapolis (-14.5)
Yikes! That's a lot of points for the Colts to cover against a team that knows how to play defense. Even without Larry Johnson I think the Chiefs can cover two plus TD's. Colts win, but fail to cover.
Colts 27 Chiefs 17

The Colts are WAY banged up. I mean, they were playing some dude at WR last week from their practice squad. Their defense is beat up, their offensive line is beat up, and Vinatieri missed two chip shots last week. So yeah, that's too many points. Colts 20, Chiefs 13.

Miami @ Philadelphia (-11)
Miami has wised up and is giving John Beck a start at QB. I like this kid a lot: strong arm, smart, decent mobility, and he comes from a great family. Whopsie. He's a Brigham Young guy, so at least he comes from a strange cult. Miami will win a game before the year is up, what with Rickey Williams returning next week, but this week it's Philly in an easy one.
Philadelphia 34 Miami 17

Speaking of young QBs... while doing the aforementioned search to try and find young QBs so I could say these 4's combined age is less than Vinny and Brett, Beck was on my list to check. The dude is 26. Maybe that's cause he was sent on a Mormon mission for a few years or something? I seem to remember so other BYU dude having a similar "old rookie" issue... Anyways, yeah, Beck will have some growing pains. Eagles 27, Dolphins 13.

New Orleans @ Houston (+2)
Father forgive me. New Orleans is playing good ball again, and Houston well, isn't. The Texans are following the inevitable course set by a team that has Mike Sherman on their staff: a slow march into oblivion. I'm going against the home dog again.
New Orleans 27 Houston 20

Saints had a big letdown against the Rams last week, who sent everyone and the kitchen sink after Brees. And it worked. So which team's coaches are smarter? The Saints and the ability to correct that problem and protect Brees better? Or the Texans and the ability to take that gameplan and run with it? I'll go with the Saints. (But just barely.) Saints 23, Texans 20.

Oakland @ Minnesota (-6)
Holy Fuck. Could this be the stinker of the season? And more importantly, is Minnesota really a favorite in this game?? Something is horribly wrong here, because the last time I checked Adrian Peterson was out. I don't know what I'm missing here folks so I'm just going with my gut. Oakland 20 Minnesota 17

Yeah, that line seems strange... The Vikings have zero offense without Peterson. And it seems the Packers may have found ways to run on that defense. Low scoring stinker of a game, to be sure. Raiders 13, Vikings 6.

San Diego @ Jacksonville (-2)
After a slow start, San Diego has begun to play better ball. Meanwhile the Jags posted a surprising 2-1 record under Quinn Gray, but expect David Garrard to be back in the lineup this week. Tough game to pick, so I'll go with the home team. Jags 24 Bolts 20

I like the Jags as well. The Chargers beat the Colts last week, but no thanks to Phillip Rivers. They can thank Manning and his 6 picks and Vinatieri for doing his best Vandershank impersonation. The Chargers remain mired in a pretty bad offensive slump, and the Jags have the D to keep them there. Jags 20, Chargers 16.

Tampa Bay @ Atlanta (+3)
This is nuts. Could I possibly pick against another home dog? You betcha. Look folks, there's a reason why my picks have been off this year and maybe this is it: I've lost my mind. But I swear I don't see Tampa losing this game, nor do I see it as close as 3. I like the Bucs, and I like Jon Gruden, and you all know what I think of Atlanta.
Bucs 20 Atlanta 10

I'm gonna take the Falcons this week. The Bucs have been up and down and their running game is struggling a bit. Oh, and check out this tidbit from my good friend Peter King. When asked by a reader who the 3rd best QB in the NFC is this year (assuming Favre and Tony "Everyone is on his peepee til he sucks in December" Romo as #s 1 and 2)... here's what he said: "As of now, I'd pick Garcia, who has been the model of efficiency playing for a quarterback coach who demands it. Brees has had one spectacular month, not good enough for the Pro Bowl, even in these watered-down QB days. Hasselbeck has been more inconsistent than Garcia." Anyways, I think Garcia is about to prove that's he's not exactly Mr. Consistent Pro Bowl QB. Falcons 17, Bucs 13.

New York Giants @ Detroit (+2)
Finally! A home dog I can get behind! Don't get me wrong, I'm rooting big for the G-men to take it to Detroit, but the Lions are some Good Rats. OK, a free beer to the first one who gets the reference. Anyway, I think the Lions have some serious firepower, and although they have some serious flaws on D I like their chances against the overrated G-men
Detroit 34 New York 27

Good Rats? What's that a reference too? There's a Dropkick Murphys song by that name about a bunch of rats who run around amuck in a bar and jump into the Guinness and get drunk and drown in it. "Come on all you good rats, we'll send you up to heaven. You'll find the pearly gates in the froth and the foam. Cause in these vats you've made quite a creation. A potion that turned the Guinness to gold!" Now, I'm not sure what that means exactly, and it may very well have implications of drinking the Guinness and leaving puddles of piss behind, but it's a good song. Anyways, I'm taking the Lions. Lions 26, Giants 20.

Pittsburgh @ New York Jets (+9)
Another home dog I'll take. The Steelers have been in a few dogfights this year, and have been resilliant. I like Pittsburgh in a close one, close enough to take the Jets with the points.
Steelers 27 Jets 24

Yep. I'll take the points. Big Ben is a good for a bad game, and I envision a garbage time score or two for the Jets. It won't be a close game, but the final score might be. Steelers 23, Jets 17.

Washington @ Dallas (-11.5)
Is Dallas that much better than the rest of their division? I'm not convinced. The Redskins defense is pretty good (well, except for that one game against New England)and I see Shaun Springs giving Tony Romo enough fits to keep it close. I'll take the Skins and the points, and don't be surprised if there's an upset in the making.
Dallas 24 Washington 20

Eleven and a half? That's insane. I'll keep saying it until someone believes me - Romo is overrated. Skins 23, Cowboys 20.

St.Louis @ San Francisco (+2)
St. Louis played a solid game last week while the Niners played like a bunch of fairies. That's not a gay slur by the way, and shame on all of you for thinking that. I mean just because it's San Francisco? Hell, there are gay people everywhere, even in Schnectady. Shame on all of you, you dirty little monkeys.
St.Louis 23 San Francisco 17

Lotsa home dogs this week. And they all deserve to be. And most of them will lose bigtime. Niners are horrible. And here's some fantasy football news.. going into Monday night, I needed 20 points to win my game this week. I had Hasselbeck and Vernon Davis (former first round pick, highly talented and greatly hyped TE for the Niners) going. Hasselbeck got me 17 points. Davis got me one measly point. I lost. Their pass protection was so bad, they kept Davis (a mediocre blocker at best) in the block all game. In fact, his missed block was directly responsible for a devastating sack by Patrick Kerney. Anyways, Trent Dilfer returns to QB for the Niners, and they'll lose. Rams 26, Niners 10.

Chicago @ Seattle (-5.5)
Little Rex is back at QB, or so the Bears fans at my new company tell me. Which means bet your fucking house on Seattle. Tommie Harris is playing hurt, Brian Urlacher is playing hurt, and the Bears secondary hasen't been right since week 2. Seattle at home will score points and will be smart enough to kick the ball far away from Devon Hester.
Seattle 30 Chicago 13

God, I hope you're right. Seattle has absolutely crushed teams they should beat.. and lost to the teams that are average or better. (Though they've stuck around in every game except the Steelers loss.) Seattle lives or dies by their pass rush. They have something like 25 sacks in their 5 wins, and like 5 in their 4 losses. If they can get to Grossman, they'll win easily. I just don't have enough faith in their defensive coordinator to make that happen. Too often he's content to sit back and play Cover 2, while the front 4 get zero pressure and they get picked apart underneath. I'll take Seattle just because I'm not convinced Grossman can hit wide open receivers consistently, but I'm far from sure about this one. Seahawks 20, Bears 13.

New England @ Buffalo (+16)
The only difference between this game and the last game is Bill Belichick won't have to scramble out of town to fuck Dick Jauron's wife and kids. However, I never like betting against these gi-nourmous spreads. The Bills have been good enough to keep it with in reason,
New England 34 Buffalo 20

I think I had something clever to say about the Patriots, but with this game so far down on the list, I forgot what it was. Oh well, I'm sure it'll come to me by next week. I've been taking the Patriots and laying the massive point spreads until the Colts game. So I'll go back to that tradition, though it's tempting not to against an upcoming and hot Bills team. Pats 38, Bills 20.

Tennessee @ Denver
As much as I like Denver at home, I'm going with the road dog this time. All I can add to that is I see this as a case of the better team rising to the occasion.
Tennessee 31 Denver 24

Vince Young has been brutal lately. I'll take the Broncos at home. Broncos 26, Titans 20.

Suicide Pool analysis

So, a suicide pool is not what a Dolphins fan has in his back yard to drown himself in, nor is it a bet amongst friends to see which computer consultant throws himself off the fucking roof of his hotel because he's been assigned to a project in Schenectady. It is not a group of coworkers being driven to work by the Asian guy from IT, nor is it the programming sequence that instructed the HAL 9000 to send the pod after poor Frank. That last one was technically a "Homicide Poole". But our friend and honorary Steve, Anonymous, has posed the following question for us: no point spread, pick the winner: Packers over the Cats or Eagles over the Dolphins. Here's what I think...

In no uncertain terms I believe that both these teams will win their respective games. The Eagles showed a tremendous amount of mettle against the feisty Redskins while the Packers dominated the Vikings in every aspect of the game. But if I had to pick one for this week, I'd take the Eagles.

There are several reasons.

First, the Eagles were challenged last week and rose to the occasion. They played a spirited game and rallied behind both their beleaguered head coach and their beleaguered quarterback. There's just no way they don't beat the Dolphins at home. Meanwhile, the Packers are a young team coming off a dominating win. Success is new to them, and I'm not sure they'll know what to do with it. In addition, the Packers play 4 days later at Detroit on Thanksgiving, and are primed for a "looking ahead" upset. The better play for the Packers is three weeks from now at home against the Raiders. With a possible letdown this week against the Cats, a Thanksgiving game against Detroit, and the Cowboys at Dallas the following week, the possibilities of a two or three game losing streak is not out of the question. I pity the poor Raiders if that comes to pass...

The second best story in football.

Mike Lupica, my favorite sportswriter wrote this today in his Sunday "Shooting from the Lip" column, available at nydailynews.com: "The Giants don't earn a trip to the Super Bowl if they beat the Cowboys today. They don't even make themselves the best team in the NFC, not if Brett Favre throws another one down the field when he has to and the Packers win again. The Giants don't make themselves the story of the season in pro football if they beat the Cowboys today, because the Patriots are the story of the season, and after them comes Favre, who makes you watch him even more now, at the age of 38, than he did when he was young."

So here in lies a story about the second best story of the season

I was terrified this week, what with the Vikings coming to Lambeau field after their big win against the Chargers last week. By now every sports fan in the country knows who Adrian Peterson is, and by all accounts I honestly believed that the Packers would not be able to stop him. Remember, when these teams first met Peterson had over 100 yards rushing in the first half alone, and was stopped only by his head coach Brad Childress who refused to use the explosive Peterson in the second half. Childress, who must have an IQ somewhere in the range of Carl Childers is probably the dumbest man in football this side of former Vikings head coach Mike Tice. Which is a fortunate happenstance for Packer fans come to think of it. Today, the Packers finally put together a complete game, a game the likes of which I haven't seen since the 52-3 drubbing of the Saints that Mrs. Samichlaus and I witnessed in 2005.

This was a game where Brett Favre didn't exactly start out firing strikes. Favre, looking like a cross between Nuke Lalouche and Scott Norwood was wide right, wide left and all over the place with his rocket balls, nearly decapitating Donald Driver's fingers on one pass. Can one actually decapitate fingers? Forgive me, I forget the Latin word for "fingers". Fortunately, the Packers running game finally woke up, and they did it against the stingiest running defense in the league. Ryan Grant had 115 yards and showed tremendous poise and balance finding the gaps while outrunning Pat Williams for most of the day. Grant's performance allowed Favre to relax, and by the end of the first half Favre found his groove. Meanwhile, the Packers defense put on a show that was reminiscent of the Reggie White era. They shut down Adrian Peterson who mustered a mere 45 yards before leaving late in the third quarter with a leg injury, and shut out the Vikings, who haven't been shut out since 1991.

And I have to say, I'm starting to believe that the Packers can play with any team in the NFL.

I'll be curious to see what happens in the Dallas - Giants game today. If we did get around to predictions this week I'd have taken the Cowboys and rooted hard to be wrong. And as far as the Patriots are concerned, well maybe the Packers could play with them but I'm not saying they'd like, win or anything. But the Packers season has thus far been a great story, reminiscent of the Denver Broncos story of 1997. I've been waiting 10 years to right that 1997 season, but I guess I shouldn't complain. Patriots fans still have their tits in a twist over the 1996 season. Sometimes you'd never believe they've won all those Super Bowls.

Every week the Packers show me something new and different, and every week they seem to get a little better. Almost every week they find a way to win.

And Brett Favre is playing the best football of his career.

Week 9 Picks (We're back!)

Annnnnnd, we're back! So Anonymous can STFU. Here's part 1.

...and here's part two! It's great to be blogging about sports again, because that's what we're all about. Well that and crushing our enemys, but I digress. This is a terrific weekend for football and I can't wait to get started.

Last Time We Picked:
St. Ides: 7-6
Samichlaus: 5-8

Season:
St. Ides: 36-37
Samichlaus: 23-50

BUCANNEERS -3.5 over Cardinals
Bucs had a tough loss last week at home against the surprising Jags. I think they take out their frustration on the enigmatic Cards this week. It looks like Kurt Warner is going to tough it out and continue to play with his left elbow in a ridiculously large brace. But I've said it once, I'll say it again - get a little pressure and Warner and knock him around, and he becomes very ineffective in a hurry. Bucs 20, Cardinals 13.

I agree with St. Ides. The Bucs at home gets 'em at least 3 points, and frankly I think the Cards are going to fold on the road. Bucs 24 Cards 17

TITANS -4.5 over Panthers
The Titans and Vince Young haven't been to impressive lately, but they keep winning somehow. Meanwhile, it looks like the Panthers are going back to David Carr at QB after the Vinny Testaverde experiment. Not sure if that's good or bad.

You gotta love Vinnie. First of all, he goes by Vinnie. Second of all, he's the only QB in the league that makes Brett Favre look like a kid. I'm not sure what's wrong with the Panthers, but man has John Fox's coaching stock dropped these days. I'll take the Titans by a TD. Titans 27 Panthers 20

BILLS +0.5 over Bengals
I just don't trust this Cinci team at all right now. They seem like they're about to implode. Throw in the fact that the Bills have looked pretty good lately (including that game they shoulda won against the Cowboys), and I'll go with them. Bills 27, Bengals 26.

I usually like the Bills at home, but not this week. That line is too close and the Bills keep finding ways to lose. If Marshawn Lynch has a good day this could go there way but I'm betting he doesn't. The weather has been unseasonably fair upstate, so I'm going with the Bengals. Bengals 20 Bills 17

Redskins -3.5 over JETS
The Mangini bad karma curse continues yo! Although it seems like they're going to (finally) bench Chad Pennington and give that Clemens kid a chance. I forget his first name, is it Kelly? When was the last time we had a successful NFL QB with the first name Kelly? Anyways, Jets stink. Skins 20, Jets 10.

I dated a Kelly once, and she was very pretty. Why oh why do parents continue to give their sons chick names? I used to work with a guy whose first name was Kim and his middle name was Leslie. Its no wonder this guy had to go to China to find a drinky drink girl so he could cheat on his wife. Uh oh, there I go again... uhh, Skins 17 Jets 10

CHIEFS -2.5 over Packers
The Chiefs defense has looked pretty damn good since they got Jared Allen back. He's been a sack machine, and likely will harass Favre most of the day. I actually like the Packers chances in this game, but after winning in Denver last week, asking them to win in KC the following week is a pretty tall order. If they pull that off, a back-to-back sweep of KC and Denver in THEIR stadiums (both tough to win in), the Packers are officially the team to beat in the NFC. (Screw the Cowboys.) Chiefs 17, Packers 13.

One thing that surprised me on Monday was the Packers ability to run the ball. Then again me, Mrs. Samichlaus, St. Ides and Anonymous could probably muster a good running game against the Broncos. I always like the Chiefs at home, but the Packers are starting to believe in themselves. Another odd fact is the Packers (like myself) have become quite the road warriors under Mike McCarthy, posting a better away record than home record. I'm going to be a fan here and take the Packers for the win. Packers 15 Chiefs 10 (PS: betting tip to Anonymous: take the under.)

Chargers -7.5 over VIKING
Seems the Chargers are back on track. Let me take a moment to give a lesson in the english language. The phrase is "on track". As in "they were off the track before, so now we're getting them back on track." I've seen, heard, read, and seen some more way too many "professional" media types use the phrase "untracked". Like "the Chargers have finally gotten untracked." Wouldn't untracked be the opposite of on track? Like they got knocked off the tracks? Why has nobody done a widespread education process of this all-too-misued phrase? Jesus H. Christ, it's common sense. It almost seems at this point that it's been misused so much, that people have just given in and accepted its new meaning. And it pisses me off. Anyways, Vikings blow. Brooks Bollinger (who couldn't cut it with the QB-challenged Jets) will likely start. Chargers 26, Vikings 10.

LOL!!! This is great! Last week I heard Steve Czaban rip Peter King for refering to Favre's touchdown pass as "arching" as opposed to "arcing". He also ripped King for admitting that he "went to bed before the end of the fourth quarter". Czaban correctly pointed out that it's his job to stay awake. Anyway, I hate the Vikings, but they've got something special in Adrian Peterson and they're starting to figure it out. I like the Vikes to keep it close: Chargers 31 Vikings 27

Broncos +3.5 over LIONS
Are the Lions for real? I have no idea. Their record is decent, but they've mostly beaten up on crappy teams. Are the Broncos a crappy team? I have no idea, they might be. Anyways, I'm going to guess that the Lions are not as good as their record, and the Broncos are not as bad as theirs. Broncos 23, Lions 21.

The Lions are the only team that scares me in the NFC North. They've beaten the Bears twice and are starting to get a little confidence. The Broncos are OK, but they are not a good road team. Take the Lions and give the points: Lions 31 Broncos 20.

Niners +3.5 over FALCONS
Wow, if the Falcons are actually favorites, you know the Niners are horrible. I'll take the points in what could be the Stinker or the Week! Oh wait, I see a worse game... Hold that thought a moment... Niners 20, Falcons 18.

I'm not going to peek, so I have to say I can't imagine what could be worse than this one. I won't waste a lot of time on it, but I'll take the Niners as well Niners 17 Falcons 10

SAINTS -3.5 over Jaguars
The Jaguars have some dude at QB I've never heard of before.. Something Gray I think? Anyways, somehow he didn't blow the game last week against the Bucs. (It helped the Jags D forced like 4 turnovers.) But this week, in New Orleans, I think he's exposed against the rejuvenated Saints. Saints 23, Jags 9.

That's a bold final score. I like the Saints as well. They're playing better, they're playing at home, and they're playing against a team led by, uhh, hold on I'm gonna look this up, Quinn Gray? OK. He's led the Frankfort Galaxy to the World Bowl, attended Florida A&M, and "possesses a strong arm and an ability to make plays". Yep, Saints win: Saints 30 Jags 10

BROWNS -1.5 over Seahawks
Dereck Anderson has looked awesome. He has more TD passes than anyone in the league except for Brady. Former Wolverine Braylon Edwards has turned into a top WR and Kellen Winslow is pretty dangerous as well. Coming off the bye under Holmgren, Seattle is something like 2-6. However, those 2 wins were in the past 2 years, when the coach has given the team the whole week off during the bye week. He did it again this year. Will that trend continue? I don't trust it to. Basically, the only way Seattle has a chance is if their inconsistent but talented defense can get pressure on the QB. If not.. it's going to be a very long day for the secondary. Browns 27, Seahawks 20.

Well, I hate to say it, but I agree. Seattle will hit stride in the second half but it's going to be too late. The Browns will jump on the rusty Seahawks early and will have enough points to hold them off. I'll take the browns by 4 Clevland 24 Seattle 20

COLTS +4.5 over Patriots
The undefeated defending Super Bowl champs getting points at home? That's pretty frickin crazy. I'm having a tough time deciding if I should Tivo the Seattle game and watch this one or not. That's what I would do IF there were a way to avoid knowing the Seattle score. Which of course with all the gamebreaks and tickers and updates and whatnot, is frickin impossible. So I'll probably watch the Seattle game and Tivo this one. And if the game turns out to be the classic some people think it can be, I'll watch it instead of the Cowboys-Eagles later that night. Good plan, no? Oh, I didn't talk about the actual game at all, did I? The Colts offense should be able to move the ball. It's really a question if the Colts defense can contain the Patriots enough. They have enough film and stuff now to work with at this point in the season, and I think Moss can be frustrated if knocked around and shut down early. And if any "role player" is going to go for Brady's knees, wouldn't it make sense to be someone on the Colts? Not only are the Patriots the biggest challenge to them repeating as Super Bowl champs, but Brady is seriously threatening Manning's TD record right now. Vinatieri with the game winning boot. Colts 32, Patriots 30.

The Colts have held the upper hand for the last three seasons in this rivalry, but I have little doubt that New England will win this game easily. Although both teams are undefeated, I honestly can't remember a team as good as this group from New England. First of all, no one lays a hand on Tom Brady. I mean, what have they given up, like 7 sacks? Second of all, the Colts haven't steamrolled teams the way the Patriots have. What the Pats did to the Redskins was almost unfathomable. That's a good football team in DC and the Patriots treated them like a high school squad. Maybe the crowd noise will keep it close, but in the end the Pats will win by 10. Pats 30 Colts 20

RAIDERS -2.5 over Texans
Ah yes, here it is, I promised you.. the Stinker of the Week! Sage Rosenfals (who couldn't win the job in QB-starved Miami) gets the start for the suddenly unimpressive Texans. Speaking of unimpressive, just as I was gloating about how I had said the Raiders aren't as bad as people think they are, they took a nose-dive and started proving me wrong. Anyways, the only reason this game is getting any attention is because it's preventing people in Houston and Oakland from seeing the Pats-Colts game. Raiders 19, Texans 13.

Oh. BTW, in case anyone missed it, the Texans released ex Packer wunderkind Samkon Gado last week, who was quickly picked up by the worst team in the NFL, the Miami Dolphins. I hope he enjoys the weather while he's there, because the next stop for the Nigerian Nightmare is Canada. Meanwhile I'll go with the Raiders at home, just cause St. Ides says so. Raiders 23 Texans 17

EAGLES +3.5 over Cowboys
I'll keep this short and sweet. Romo and the Cowboys are overrated. Romo has been hanging out with Britney Spears and crew. This is a divisional matchup. It's in Philly. And McNabb's knee has looked better as of late. Eagles 26, Cowboys 23.

TONY ROMO AND BRITNEY SPEARS? Dear God, what in the name of Redneck Jesus is going on here? That's a baaaaad sign, what with the new contract and Britney to spend it all. Jesus. OK, back to football, I'm going to go with the Cowboys. The 'boys have easily handled everyone they've played, well except for that loss to New England, and the Eagles are too inconsistant. I won't mind being wrong about this game: Cowboys 37 Eagles 27

Ravens +9.5 over STEELERS
The Steelers have looked good at times. That's just way too many points to give in a divisional rivalry against a defense as good as Baltimore. They're not as dominating as past years, but they're still above average. Steelers 17, Ravens 13.

Agreed. If the Ravens can shut down Willie Parker this game will close, and I'm betting they can Take the Ravens and the points: Steelers 20 Ravens 17

Cheeseheads, Chowderheads, and Dresden circa mid February 1945

I have a new job that takes me to a place called Schenectady New York every week. It's a good paying job for a seemingly good consulting company, and the client is chock full of really nice people. But Schenectady? Why? No sooner did I take this job, a former co-worker approached me about doing work in Europe, traveling all over Germany, Italy, Holland and all sorts of wonderful places I never would have the chance to visit in the foreseeable lifetime. I told her about my new job, and how in a strange way Schenectady reminded me a little of Europe. And then I added: "think Dresden, circa mid February 1945"...


Its a great time to be Packer fan. There are Packer fans all over the country and wherever I go I run into them, even here in Schenectady. The hotel I'm staying in has a media room with a 60" TV and surround sound, and it was there I watched the Packer game with some guy who happened to be from Green Bay. Nice fellow, but he was confused by me because I wasn't drinking. He kept asking me if I wanted a beer and I kept saying "not yet". Most Wisconsinites really don't get people who don't drink, especially fellow bald fat Packer fans, but eventually I said "OK, grab me a Coors light". If Wisconsinites don't understand people who don't drink, they really don't understand people who drink Coors light. "How can you drink that stuff" he asked. Since the Packers were playing were playing the Broncos in Denver I replied "I figure we'll beat their football team and drink their beer in the process". He understood that.

The best part of Monday's game for me though was the second half and the overtime. Oh, not for the obvious reasons that you might be thinking, but rather for the fact that Mrs. Samichlaus watched the game with me while we were on the phone together. As you are all painfully aware by now, Mrs. Samichlaus and I have been a little distracted by a whale of a situation that I dealt with in a previous post. As a result we haven't really watched the games together, but this week we found a way. Mrs. Samichlaus was going on and on about how every time she watches the Packers this season they don't play well. I kept saying "aww shit, it doesn't work that way" but the more I watched the game the more I started to believe that there might have been something to this. When Denver kicked the field goal to tie the game I blurted out "turn the game off, will ya" but quickly said "Wait, I'm only kidding". Truth be told I was half kidding, but I would never tell my wife that. Thank God she never reads my blog... Anyway, the Packers win the coin toss and start on their 18. And then Favre hits Jennings and the two of us start screaming. I'm in my hotel room at 11:45 at night yelling "GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!!!" while my wife is on the other end of the phone yelling "IT'S OVER! IT'S OVER!!!" The magic was back, the questions about Brett's arm strenght were answered, and all was right in the Samichlaus household...

The only collective group of people in a happier place right now than the Cheeseheads are the Chowderheads. Schenectady is in Upstate New York and there are as many people who identify with New England as they do with New York. As a result I have been bombarded with "Red Sox Nation" and "Patriots Nation" since I've got here, and frankly these obnoxious fuckers have a lot to crow about. I have to say that as a Mets fan and a Yankees hater this puts me in the unenviable position of rooting for the Sawks from time to time. Not that there's anything wrong with that, history teaches us that the Red Sox have been kind to the Mets in the past. I swear if they ever build a "Monument Park" at the new Mets ballpark the first monument they stick in should be Bill Buckner. Calvin Shiraldi might get one as well. So I don't mind rooting for the Sawks, its getting lumped in with the damn chowderheads that freaks me out. Chowderheads are like Eagles fans with a goofy accent. Except that Eagles fans run the risk of getting tossed into jail at their own stadium. There doesn't seem to be any law up here for the Chowderheads, and they are free to roam the streets without fear of repercussion.

What the Sawks did to the Rockies was delightfully criminal. The Rockies didn't know what hit them, and Boston simply beat them in every aspect of the game. It wasn't even close. I suspect the Patriots will do the same to the Colts. The Colts are a young team and although they are undefeated, they are not in the same league as the Pats. If we get around to our predictions this week I'll break it down a little further but really, this game isn't going to be close. For now, the Chowderheads are reveling a deserved revel. The Cheesheads remain cautiously optimistic, and I can't wait to get home to my wife...

NFL Divisional Power Rankings

So someone suggested this on another board I visit, and I took them up on the offer. Kind of hard to rank entire divisions, but here goes!

1. AFC South - Colts, Jags, and Titans should all challenge for a playoff spot, and the Texans are improved.

2. NFC East - Cowboys and Giants seem like the real deal. Even the Skins defense keeps them in games. And the inconsistent Eagles can still probably win quite a few games.

3. AFC North - Steelers and Ravens should battle it out to the end, but the surprising Browns give this division a better overall look.

4. NFC North - Packers look very good, Lions and Bears are somewhere between 9-7 and 7-9 I'd say, which is better than most divisions will have.

5. NFC South - Panthers and Bucs are decent, and Saints could be coming on after 2 wins in a row.

6. NFC West - Sehawks and Cardinals look a bit up and down, but have talent. Niners can be dangerous if they get healthy. Rams are beat up.

7. AFC West - Does anybody want to win this division? Broncos are losing games at home (a very bad sign), the Raiders are the Raiders, the Chargers got off to that awful start, and the Chiefs running game looks worse than Seattle's.

8. AFC East - Forget about the records of everybody in this division besides the Patriots for a second, just consider their talent and what they're going to accomplish this year. You've got 2 of the bottom 3 teams in the league in this division (Jets and Fins), and throw in the Bills, that's like 3 of the worst 10 teams in the league. Yeah, they win.

Let's clear this up right now.

Words are powerful things. Sometimes they can be frightening…

In my vitriolic fervor last week I wrote these words: “I hope I meet him some day, because once upon a time on the PWP Forum he said that my wife looked “frightening”. I don’t think he knows the meaning of the word frightening, but he will after he meets me.”

My intent was to convey that compared to my wife I am the frightening looking one. And anyone who has ever met us can attest to the fact that (to quote Lou Gehrig) I am the luckiest man on the face of the earth. Take a look at the picture. I’m the frightening looking one wearing the PWP tee shirt. (The handsome fellow draped on my wife is Dennis, a very cool photographer in Chi-town)

Let me state unequivocally that I have no ill will, nor do I intend any ill will towards the gentleman in question. I deeply regret this misunderstanding, and sincerely apologize for the angst my poor choice of words caused.

I will make my personal apology to him, and will not discuss this matter further.

Bye Week

For those of you expecting our usual weekly picks, it is with sadness that I must inform you that the Steves are taking a bye week. This decision sort of came about on Friday, when I sent St. Ides an email saying my picks were going to be late...

Look, I had a legitimate excuse: my flight to Richmond on Thursday was rerouted, so by the time I got home, got caught up with Mrs. Samichlaus, and went to sleep it was sometime close to 2 AM. Friday was a recovery day, spent staggering around waiting for my cold medicine to wear off, and really I was in no shape to do much of anything.

Meanwhile, poor St. Ides was swamped at work, and had little time for socializing. That, along with a deep depression about the Seahawks season didn't provide much motivation for blogging about football for the I-genius, and I don't blame him

However today I'm in a good mood. It's about 72 and sunny here in the Capital of the Confederacy, perfect weather to tool around in my convertible, and goodness knows these beautiful days are dwindling...

Next week we'll be back at full strength, providing our unique insights into the world of professional football and all sorts of sports, as well as the occasional foray into the dark side of human nature...

What a day for Sports Blog Steves!

Wow! This has been by far the most heavily trafficed day here at Sports Blog Steves! Over 100 unique IP addresses stopped by today to read my instant classic, "The Silence of the Lambs". Thanks for your overwhealming support!

While you're here let me introduce you to Sports Blog Steves. This is a site where me and one of my IT buddies from New York (who happens to think the world of Wedding Photographers) chat about sports. We share our opinions with Mrs. Samichlaus, who as you probaly know by now is the love of my life, and our faithful reader Anonymous, a die hard chowderhead Patriots fan with a wicked sense of humor and a lot of sports smarts.

To get acclimated to our writing (which occurs mostly during the NFL season) I'd like to share some of my favorite blogs...

My all time favorite blog, about Mrs. Samichlaus's unforunate, well, past judgement is here.
My second all time favorite, about our experiences in China is here
Sometimes we brilliantly deduce the truth about a person years before they self destruct, as we did with Michael Vick.
Steve St. Ides, my brilliant partner in crime, can get a bit over analytical. But he's an Application Developer. Sometimes I don't know what makes that cat tick.
A lot of time we try our hand at humor, like we did here and here.
And sometimes we deal with serious issues like racisim and sexisim.
Sometimes we talk about baseball and the drunks who call the games.
Once, even Karen Simmons had something nice to say to me.

So check us out and come back soon. I'll promise to write more sports stuff...

The Silence of the Lambs

To our regular SBS readers: this is not a typical post about sports. It's a post of a highly personal nature. Karen Simmons, my wife's business partner, has stolen (from our calculations) about $15,000.00 of our money. This is not something I am proud to admit, because it is indicative of my own stupidity to allow my family to be bamboozled by this con artist. For those who care about such things, Karen Simmons is a wedding photographer in Atlanta, and the truth about what she did will come out in the courts. I intended to post the following on my wife's blog (kikimarcus.com) but decided it was better suited to appear here, so that there would be no doubt in anyone's mind who was making this post...

A lot of you must be wondering where I’ve been while this whole mess has gone down between Karen Simmons and my family. I’ve been wondering this myself.

The last time Karen stayed at my house, I heard her raise her voice to my wife. It was over the disabling of an account on PWP, some whiney loser whose name I can't recall. I hope I meet him some day, because once upon a time on the PWP Forum he said that my wife looked “frightening”. I don’t think he knows the meaning of the word frightening, but he will after he meets me. Karen Simmons objected to my wife disabling the account and yelled (and I mean yelled) NO NO NO NO NO.

In my house. To my wife.

And I said nothing. But I seethed.

It wouldn’t be the last time Karen Simmons would scream at my wife that weekend, but it was the last time she did it in front of me. And I’m writing this because I am so disappointed in myself. I should have thrown her out of my house on her fat ass right then and there, but I didn’t. Why? My wife was in business with this disgusting ill mannered woman and out of respect to my wife, I kept silent. That was wrong of me.

Three weeks prior to that, I kept silent in Florida at a business meeting between Karen Simmons and my wife because I didn’t feel it was my place to participate. Karen is a terrible business woman, and we were heavily invested with her. I wanted to say something to warn my wife but I didn’t. When I finally muttered something, it was in a way that only upset my wife further. It was cowardly on my part. I was wrong about that too.

On that trip, when it seemed as though all of Karen Simmons’s friends were throwing her under the proverbial bus, I sat with her. I told her she was family. I told her that her friends were not true friends, and that we would stick by her. I told her this because I wanted to believe her. I showed her love and compassion. Except I was wrong about that as well.

So, I’m not going to be silent anymore.

Every rumor, every suggestion, every innuendo, every negative story you have heard about Karen Simmons is 100% true. She is a self centered, no talented ox. She is a criminal. She is immoral. And she has hurt my family. And that was her mistake.

And now I’m pursuing legal remedy. Not because I’m angry or upset, but because it is right and good to warn people about Karen Simmons. It’s a chance for me to right some wrongs, some of mine and all of hers. Someone has to stop this adulterous criminal, before she hurts another good hearted person.

You fat filthy fuck: I know you’re reading this blog. I’m a pretty smart guy, a lot smarter than you. I’m going pursue every legal means to recover what you took from my family, and if you happen to lose everything along the way then so be it. You have brought this upon yourself. I don’t care about you or your family, the pig you’re fucking, or his family.

Oh, hi there. I imagine you’re reading this as well.

And I don’t like you.

Week 6 Picks (Part One) (and Part Two!!)

Holy crap, I think Samichlaus only got 1 right last week.. Let me double-check that, please hold.... Yep, the only winner he picked was the Patriots. Ouch. That'll be a rough hole to get out of.. Maybe now is a good time to break out the "drop your worst week and pretend it never happened" rule for our overall scores...

Wowsers! I was right! That was my worst week ever! The good news is my picks should start improving significantly, because I am officially employed! It's obvious that while I wasn't working I had waaayyyy too much time on my hands to analyze football picks, thus leading to the debacle that was week 5.

On a personal note, Friday was our 5th wedding anniversary, and Mrs. Samichlaus and I enjoyed a fabulous night on the town here in the windy city. We dined at Signatures, a restaurant that sits atop the John Hancock tower, enjoyed a fireworks display at the Navy Pier, and headed back to our hotel for some special husband and wife time that frankly put the Navy Pier display to shame...


Last Week:
St. Ides: 5-9
Samichlaus: 1-13

Season:
St. Ides: 29-31
Samichlaus: 18-42

Texans +6.5 over JAGUARS
The Texans got off to a good start... and have pretty much collapsed lately. You're going to hear me saying "I don't trust" quite a bit this year, as just about 90% of the teams in this league have glaring weaknesses that cause more than a little uneasy when picking them. Hell, what the heck, let's see if I can work the phrase into every single pick. Call it a cheap gimmick, but whatever. So let's get this party started: I don't trust David Garrard or the Jags receivers. Texans 23, Jaguars 20.

I don't trust my own damn judgment any more. However I am under contract to provide my insight. The Texans are getting healthy, enough to keep this game close. They don't have the horsepower to win, but I like the cover. Jags 24 Texans 20

Rams +9.5 over RAVENS
I don't trust the Ravens D. I don't trust Steve McNair. And I don't trust the Ravens to blow out anybody. Ravens 19, Rams 13.

Like St. Ides, I too have little faith in the Ravens. But McNair is questionable, and Kyle Boller if given the opportunity will shine against the Rams. Meanwhile the Rams are seriously f-'d up. Their injury report reads like a casualty list from Antietam. I'm going the other way on this one: Ravens 31 Rams 20


BROWNS -4.5 over Dolphins
I don't trust Cleo Lemon. I don't trust the Dolphins defense to return its usual self. And I actually like what I've seen from the Browns offense lately. Interesting subplot: Dolphins loudmouth LB Joey Porter is talking smack about Browns TE Kellen Winslow. Apparently the smack talking goes back to the Browns-Steelers rivalry. Including calling Winslow a fag last year. Porter this week said something like, "He's not a tight end. He's a wide receiver. He can't block nobody." And Winslow replied, "Man, why is he so angry all the time? I think he needs a hug." Hahah. I enjoyed that comeback. Browns 26, Dolphins 20.

Sadly, the Dolphins are a joke. I was checking their website earlier this week (I TOLD you I was putting too much time into this) and the propaganda was "Cam Cameron is still adjusting the roster to find the right chemistry" For cripes sake, it's week 6. Cleo Lemon brings his 53.6 QB rating to the table, and that's just wrong. Don't be surprised if John Beck doesn't finish this one. Browns 27 Dolphins 10

CHIEFS +2.5 over Bengals
I don't trust Herm Edwards. I don't trust the Bengals defense. And I don't trust the Bengals defense on the road in KC. If Larry Johnson is ever going to get it going this year, this is the game to do it. Although if the Bengals offense gets going, it might be tough for the Chiefs to keep up, even against this defense. Bengals 28, Chiefs 27.

I hate picking against the home dog, but here it is: The Bengals are just better than the Chiefs. I've lost faith in Herm Edwards, and honestly the Bengals can light it up. Even at Arrowhead. Bengals win, and easy. Bengals 34 Chiefs 20

BUCANNEERS -2.5 over Titans
I don't trust the Titans on the road against a good team coming off a tough divisional loss. Like I said in my Power Rankings, I'm starting to buy into the idea that Jeff Garcia is a slightly above average QB who can win games. This should be a pretty good test for Vince Young, and if he pulls this game out, maybe it's time to start taking the Titans a bit more seriously. Bucs 20, Titans 17.

I still don't buy into the Bucs. Garcia is a good QB, but Vince Young is a stud. The Bucs are good at home and will be fired up this week, but in the end (insert Jeff Garcia joke here) Vince Young and the Titans will prevail. Titans 27 Bucs 24

PACKERS -3.5 over Redskins
I'm tempted to take the Skins and the points, but I'll go with the idea that the Packers are legit and they bounce back nicely from last week's loss. Plus, I don't trust Jason Campbell as a full-time starting QB in the NFL. Packers 27, Skins 20.

I'm not very confident after the second half stinker I witnessed last week. The Skins play that same cover 2 that the Bears play, and the Pack had no answer for the Bears adjustments. My head is still spinning over that one. However, I'm sticking with my boys. They need a dominating home game as they head into the bye week, and Favre & Co will deliver exactly that. Packers 31 Skins 10

Eagles -2.5 over JETS
I don't trust Donovan McNabb. At all. I also don't trust Chad Pennington and the bad mojo Mangini brought down upon the Jets. Could it be... could it... let's see here, let me peek at the rest of the games... Yep! It's two 2006 Playoff teams in the Stinker of the Week! Eagles 24, Jets 20.

Absolutely the stinker of the week. The Eagles at least have shown some potential, and the Jets really haven't. I'll bet Giants Stadium is going to be a disaster area, with Eagle fans making the trek up to the Meadowlands. The beer fights will be starting early, and the Eagles will win the game: Eagles 24 Jets 17

Vikings +5.5 over BEARS
Wow, tough call on this one. I don't trust either offense or QB. I guess I'll take the points, even though I think the Vikings absolutely stink. Speaking of which, former Wolverine and Seahawk (and current St. Ides All-Hated Team member) Steve Hutchinson has been described as "clumsy" looking this season. In fact, let's quote SI's Dr. Z (who I generally can't stand): "Right side of the O-line is a disaster. Left side was supposed to be the money side, but Bryant McKinnie gives up sacks and all-world Steve Hutchinson is effective at times, clumsy at other times." Maybe sometime soon people will realize he only looked so dope in Seattle cause he was next to Walter Jones, and they'll stop voting him to the Pro Bowl on rep alone. Bears 17, Vikings 13.

Quoting Dr. Z? Talk about "the enemy of my enemy is my friend"... The Bears big win in Green Bay has really got Chi-town fired up. That was the kind of win that turns around a franchise. Meanwhile the Vikes are still coached by Brad Childress who is an idiot. I never thought I'd say this but they were better off with Mike Tice. I'll go with da Bears: Bears 20 Vikings 10


CARDINALS -3.5 over Panthers
Holy crap, can the Cardinals be for real? Someone double-check the calendar and make sure it's not the 1999, cause the starting QBs in this game could very well be Kurt Warner and Vinny Testaverde. I don't trust QBs over the age of 40, unless their name is Favre. Arizona needs to win this game to be taken seriously as a playoff contender in the NFC. Cardinals 23, Panthers 17.

Hey, this is so cool! Vinny Testaverde's middle name is Frank! That's two of my older brothers names: Vinny and Frank! But I digress. Testaverde has been struggling to learn the playbook this week, making them easy pickings for the suddenly real Cardinals. I like the Cards too. Cardinals 24 Panthers 17

Raiders +10.5 over CHARGERS
That's a lot of points for a 2-3 team to be giving a 2-2 divisional rival. I don't trust Phillip Rivers, I don't trust the Chargers coaching staff, and I don't trust their unjuiced defense. Chargers should win, but won't cover. The Raiders defense is actually pretty good, better than some of the other defenses that have shut down Tomlinson so far this year. Chargers 24, Raiders 23.

I don 't think it will be as close as St. Ides thinks, but I do think he's got the pick right. The Bolts have been disappointing to say the least while the Raiders have been surprising. I think this game will be close enough to take the Raiders and the points: Chargers 27 Raiders 20


Patriots -4.5 over COWBOYS
I don't trust Tony Romo in a big game against a good defense. I don't trust the stone hands of TO. I don't trust the Cowboys secondary. See my previous posts about what I told Anonymous about this game. The summary: Pats have got nothing to worry about. Patriots 38, Cowboys 20.

The Cowboys barely beat the Bills last week, if not for the ineptitude of a team that can't cover an onside kick. I like New England too, a team that has shown no weakness and an ability to dominate even when they're not at their best. New England 37 Dallas 24

Saints +6.5 over SEAHAWKS
I don't trust Matt Hasselbeck right now. I don't trust the offensive line's run-blocking, or Shaun Alexander's tap-dancing running style. I don't trust Seattle to put away a desperate Saints team who's better than their record. And I don't trust I'll be able to keep writing football pieces if Seattle keeps letting me down. Saints 20, Seahawks 13.

LOL! Please keep writing football pieces! You're the one bringing legitimacy to this blog! Seahawks at home against a Saints team that has shown nothing. I'm sensing a Seattle win, and I'm hoping it a big one. But it won't be. The Saints lose, but cover: Seahawks 27 Saints 24


FALCONS +3.5 over Giants
I don't trust that the Giants defense is really as good as they've looked in some games. I don't trust Eli Manning on the road. And I don't trust the Michael Vick jinx against the Falcons. (They've already broken it by wining one game, no?) Giants 31, Falcons 30.

My lord, haven't the poor Falcons suffered enough? At least this week and arbitrator ruled that they can recover 20 million dollars of Vick's signing bonus. That's the surest sign that the curse may have been short lived. I see a Falcons win: Falcons 27 Giants 24

The 5/17ths Season Power Rankings!

It's a special Wednesday treat! We're 29% done with the season, so let's have a little bit of Power Ranking fun, shall we? This is basically how I think the teams rank right now, and my final little section about who I think the playoff teams will be when the season ends doesn't necessarily match up. Like if a team looks like they suck right now, but I think they'll come around, they'll be rated low-ish, but still might show up on the playoff team list. (Like the Lions.) Likewise, if a team is playing pretty good right now, but I expect to collapse, they probably won't make the playoff list. (Like the Cardinals.)

32. Rams
Decimated offensive line. Bulger and Steven Jackson out. Holt still a little gimpy after knee surgery. And their defense still stinks.

31. Vikings
No QB. Decent running game. No QB. Decent run defense. Not so great pass defense. Questionable coaching. No WRs worth mentioning. (Bobby Wade is their #1 WR?!) And absolutely, positively, no QB.

30. Falcons
The players are already starting to give the first year coach problems. Hall and Crumpler are both complaining. They have Joey Harrington and Byron Leftwich as QB options. Their defense might be halfway decent, but good luck winning more than 5.

29. Dolphins
Ladies and gentleman, presenting your starting QB, Cleo Lemon! (And if you were wondering, he's black. With a name like that, it was a toss-up.)

28. Jets
If Pennington finally gets benched, they might move up a few slots. But like I said, Mangini has some bad mojo going after ratting out the Pats.

27. Chiefs
Herm Edwards is a bad coach. Sometimes bad coaches win a few games.

26. Saints
Wow, they look bad. The happy story of post-Katrina success is over. Brees can't hit the broad side of a barn, and their D stinks. And Sean Payton is resorting to weird voodoo-like rituals to try and conjure some luck. Of course, that means they'll probably beat Seattle this week.

25. Bills
They're decimated by injuries, although the rookie QB has looked decent at times. Oh look. 3 of the 4 AFC East teams are in the bottom 8. Their records? 1-4, 1-4, 0-5. That's 6 easy wins for the quickly-becoming-disliked Patriots.

24. Niners
Their offense has been horrible and that was before Alex Smith went down and was replaced by Trent Dilfer. Their defense is decent, but with their offensive line stinking and their QB/WRs even worse, they're not going to outscore people.

23. Bears
Maybe Brian Griese and the Bears are going to get rolling after the come-from-behind win in Green Bay? I doubt it.

22. Eagles
Aside from the game where they lit up the Lions for like 50+ points, they've been horrible. I said it once, and I'll say it again - McNabb doesn't look like his old self. That leg injury has changed him, and not for the better. Their defense hasn't lived up to expectations either.

21. Broncos
The Jay Cutler era began last year with a loss in Denver to the injured Seahawks. Since them, he still hasn't really found his groove. If he was a bigger name playing for a more popular team, the "bust" label would be flying around all over the place right now. Oh, and starting RB Travis Henry will be suspended for the season for smoking doobies.

20. Raiders
Replacing Art Shell is worth at least 4-5 more wins. Their defense is actually pretty good. And they've gotten their running game going lately. Once teams shut down the run, their passing game will be exposed as pretty bad, but the AFC West is suddenly pretty mediocre.

19. Bengals
Explosive offense. Non-existent defense. And several convicts. I still think Carson Palmer is a pretty good QB, and his weapons are among the best in the league. They'll have a rough time making the playoffs, but they'll win a few games against good teams.

18. Browns
Pretty nice surprise here considering their opening day QB played all of 1 quarter and was sent packing before Week 2. (By the way, word out of Seattle is that Charlie Frye is doing a nice job learning the offense, and Holmgren feels more comfortable using versatile backup QB Seneca Wallace in more roles now.) Anyways, the AFC North is pretty much a toss-up after the Steelers, and I think the Browns will be in the mix.

17. Texans
Got off to a good start, but have fallen to earth since then. A big part of that is losing Pro Bowl WR Andre Johnson. Once he's back to near full strength, they should win around 8 games or so I think.

16. Chargers
Tomlinson crying after a loss isn't going to win him any fans. Their coaching staff stinks. And, like I said, Shawn Merriman isn't nearly as dangerous now that he's off the juice. They could get hot, but their slow start has them playing catch-up.

15. Giants
Not sure what to think of them. Their defense played horrible for 2 games, then suddenly pulled it all together? Eli Manning is playing fairly well? I dunno. I just don't trust them.

14. Lions
They have a nice array of receiving threats, and Kitna has looked good at times. But they have no running game. And if Kitna were really that good a QB, would Holmgren have jettisoned him for Hasselbeck so quickly?

13. Redskins
Their defense has played well. But I haven't quite bought into the Jason Campbell QB situation yet. They get the nod over the Lions only cause they beat them last week.

12. Seahawks
Banged up receivers. Pro Bowl FB Mack String has retired. The run blocking has sucked, and Shaun Alexander's little dancing around in the backfield leads to more losses than gains. Hasselbeck looked awful last week. And while they could be among the top 5 in another 2-3 weeks, right now they don't deserve to be any higher than this. I don't trust them at all.

11. Titans
It's the Vince Young show! I don't know a whole lot about the Titans beyond Vince Young, Lendale White, and Pacman Jones, but every time I look up they're keeping the score close against everyone they play and Vince Young is making a play.

10. Jaguars
It's only a matter of time before David Garrard and their butter-fingered receivers start o cost the Jaguars games. In the meantime, they've played fairly well within their division and their defense has been serviceable.

9. Cardinals
The beat the Seahawks and Steelers, and really should have beaten the Niners. 2 of their wins were by a field goal, as were 2 of their losses. They could be anywhere from 4-1 to 1-4 right now. They're in between at 3-2. And with Leinart hurt, Kurt Warner takes over full-time. Will he be rejuvenated? Probably not once people remember that he gets rattled once you knock him around a bit.

8. Panthers
They should probably be lower than this, but I can't justify putting anybody above them. David Carr is their QB. Steve Smith has been quiet. Yet somehow they're 3-2 and lead the NFC South.

7. Bucanneers
I like what Jeff Garcia brings to this team on offense. (And I don't mean his secret recipe for fabulous Cosmopolitans.) Though their defense was exposed by the Colts... who isn't? They should have a pretty good chance to win the wide open NFC South as long as they don't get hit with too many injuries.

6. Ravens
Not sold on them. But again, who do I put higher? This parity bullshit is starting to get old. Really, everybody from 3 to 12 or so could be easily interchanged. McNair is old. So is Ray Lewis. Their defense is getting by on reputation now, not actual play.

5. Cowboys
Here's what I just sent Anonymous when he expressed some nervousness cause the Pats are only a 4 and a half point favorite over the Cowboys this week: "Repeat after me: Romo is overrated. The only reason he gets so much hype is because he plays for the Cowboys and dates an American Idol. He threw 5 picks against an awful defense decimated by injuries. When they did the in-game defensive introduction last night for the Bills, I only recognized 2 names (Schobel and Whitner). They've beaten up on the Giants (before the Giants learned how to play D again), Miami (0-5), Chicago (with Grossman in), the Rams (0-5), and Buffalo (1-4). And in the playoff game last year, Romo couldn't get it done AGAINST A FRICKIN REAL ESTATE AGENT playing CB for Seattle.
Brady and Moss are going to have a FIELD DAY against the Dallas safeties who cannot cover whatsoever. (Notice the only decent QB they've faced so far is Eli Manning, who hung 35 points on them.)"

4. Packers
I'd have them at #3 if they beat the Bears this past week. But they just couldn't finish them off. Which isn't a good sign. But it's not a real bad sign either, considering how frickin bad the whole league is. They actually established a run game, which is nice. I'd be shocked if they don't make the playoffs.

3. Steelers
Ouch. They dismantled the Seahawks. Without Polamolu, Hines Ward, their #2 WR, and their Pro Bowl NT. Big Ben actually made good decisions and was accurate. Where the hell did that come from? The Steelers defense is very good. They knew what they were doing to let bigmouth Joey Porter walk. They should win the AFC North fairly easily.

2. Patriots
Some more quotes I sent to Anonymous: "Oh and repeat after me again: "I am a Patriots fan, I am spoiled by success, and I can expect ZERO sympathy from the Steves this season. None whatsoever." Also, did you see the Browns accusing Vrabel of going for the knees? Between that and Wilfork, there's some bad karma building up. You've been warned." While they're enjoying running up the score against everybody as a big "F You" to those who might think their video-taping shennanigans, what goes around comes around. The Football Gods have not finished with this scenario yet. And while Tom Brady gets allllllll my love, he's about due for a torn ACL, isn't he? I mean, if Patriots players are going for opposing QBs' knees, (something they absolutely do not need to do to win), it's just a matter of time before someone gives them a taste of their own medicine.

1. Colts
Even with Marvin Harrison and Joseph Addai out, they put up 33 points on a pretty good Tampa Bay defense. Really, the Patriots should be #1, but it's close enough that the aforementioned pending bad karma gives the nod to the Colts. Although... I think Peyton Manning is about due for a catastrophic injury as well....

Playoff Teams:

AFC: Colts, Patriots, Steelers, Titans, Ravens, Raiders (someone has to win the AFC West, right?)
NFC: Packers, Cowboys, Bucs, Seahawks, Lions, Giants